Somewhere between being half asleep and awake…I laid listening when something so impacting caught my attention.  I was forced to turn over and pick up my son’s laptop to see who was talking.

Taking up my broken glasses and trying as best as I could to fix them upon my nose…I glared into the monitor screen of the laptop.

I have heard many conversations on being gay…involved in the homosexual lifestyle…but none as touching or as honest as Tonex’s  discussion with Lexi. 

Now, for those of you who do not know who Tonex is…well he is a young gospel recording artist…now turned pastor and gospel artist.   And Lexi is a gospel recording artist with a talk show on the Word Network…a black religious television channel…which I catch by viewing it over the internet.

This season Lexi has set about making her show more sustance  filled…hitting hot topics and talking to people in the black religious world talking about hot and usually taboo issues within the black church.

So, I was awaken and drawn into the discussion wondering who I was listening to talk about having been abused as a very young child at the age of 3 then again at 6.  But who was careful to clarify that the choices he had made in his life were his choices… and that he did not want to put them off upon the circumstances of sexual abuse as a child.  And that is what made me really start listening to the program.

Oftentimes, people go about playing out their lives and doing things which they want to blame because of past things in their lives.  It is easy to say-

“I did it because of what I had experienced as a child.”

Imagine what kind of world we would be living in if we all set about doing things because of  something in our past.

We have all experienced things.  Things that we may or may not have shared with anyone else or  even our parents.  My 2 experiences as a very young child, I never spoke a word of it to my parents…or anyone else for that matter.   For what reason I do not know. 

I believe as children we feel that certain acts against us are wrong…or that something was not right about it.  Our little minds as a child had no way of quite understanding the acts.  For the most parts we were not even participants…though the act was perpetrated against us.  We felt it…went throught it…but could not wrap our little minds around it (what had happened).

Some became marked by it early…and started acting out sexually.  But others went on…all the while trying to deal with that hidden secret.  And carried it through their lives…and it marked every experience…every relationship…and every thought that they have had.

What struck me as interesting was how honestly Tonex was able to articulate some very true and highly mis-understood things.  Many outside of the life have no understanding at all of  anything gay…except some mis-concepts that they have developed on the subject.

They fail to understand that not just straight people can develop deep and loving relationships with one another.  And that these relationships can run as deep as any of  those of any person.

But these relationships though the people involved may feel  is right…but yes…it is out of  alignment with the word of God.  The feelings…attractions…etc…are not really real.  It is a spirit.  And this spirit is just as strong as any spirit that can attach itself  to anyone.

And unless God brings you…or them out…they continue to linger in the feeling that what they are doing is alright.  What many do not understand is…is this…that it is through God’s grace and mercy that we are all save.   People say that they believe this… and that they know this.  But they don’t… not really.

It is through His love that we who have come out…have emerged from the lives that we once lived (be it drug abuse, adultery, fornication, lying, stealing, lesbanism, homosexuality etc…).  Because without Him none of us would have come out of anything.

I admire people who are honest.  That whole on the DL thing…on down-low thang…distrubs me.  Because it is littered with lies…and deception.  It thrives based upon falsehoods…and may times denial.

I like honest people.  People who know they are battling with something and are looking toward God for deliverance. 

I can see the work that God is going to do in the life of  Tonex…because he is what God loves.   Tonex is someone  who is not afraid to be honest…yet loves  the Lord…and wants Him to do a work in him.  And not ashamed to say-

“I am waiting on Him to do it while I battle living in this thing.”

What a great program that Lexi had with Tonex.  Both she and Tonex through that show did a glorious work.  I am sure that someone fighting to find themself emotionally and sexually…and perhaps has turned against the church for having turned against them…found strenght in that show.  And confirmation of the fact that God is important even in their life…as they continue to battle with the demons that dwell within them. 

But God shall truly give them the victory…if they continue to trust and believe.  And not grow weary.

Love you, Tonex.  Your honesty will fall upon the hearts of many.  And I look forward to continue to see the great works that God is going to truly do through your life and through your honesty.  Many may not understand it…but it is not for the many.  But for those whom God intends to hear it…it shall reach them.  And it will do a work in their hearts.

Married for 4 years, Tonex fought with the demons.  But found that the draw was too great…and eventually came out of his marriage. 

He battled over his singing career though having won many awards…while trying to deal with the demons drawing him.  And for a while turned away from performing and recording.

The demons…the demons.  We fight them everyday.   We all do no matter what they may be…but we fight them.   There are times when we have all submitted ourselves to them.   And if  it had not been for the Lord…we would still all be in them.

It is a subject rarely proached by the black church except as thing of a joke.  But  there is nothing funny about it.   And the problem is in the black church as much as it is everywhere else. ..for the devil has many captives everywhere and in all kinds of  snares.

Though I admire Tonex’s honesty regarding his sexual issues.   A Pastor, however, is suppose to be without spot or blemish.  Though I know that there are many Pastors who fall far short from being spotless.   The office, however, calls for those who are truly lead by the Lord…that they should not themselves be confused…or  be living in confusion.  But God, I am sure…will press this upon his mind and heart. 

Recently, I had to stop going to our usual church because of the Pastor.  He began to start to get too friendly…and believe me it was not my imagination…far from it.    Though I had heard stories about him…I had felt that all the problems in his home had turned him around.  It seemed that God had stricken nearly everybody in his family…wife…children…etc…with something.  And still  he  hadn’t gotten the message.

Since I couldn’t get out to do anything that I really wanted to do today…I stayed home.  Sat out on the porch reading my Bible and then decided to take a nap as I didn’t go to sleep last night until some time after 5 AM this morning as I busy writing another blog…the one before this one.   So, I am a bit tired. 

Hope you had a beautiful day.    

Well, God bless… and enjoy the rest of your evening.

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…”  www.bsmith101.wordpress.com  ©2009

I have been thinking about the below video since I first saw it.  I found it a bit troubling…perhaps many of you won’t understand this blog at all…but those who are under the blood of  Jesus Christ will.  So, if you do not…it is okay.   It’s alright.

But what has me wondering about the below video?

Well…at first was why in the world was Juanita Bynum wasting her time to produce a video about  Valentine’s Day????

For a self-proclaimed prophet…(now turned actor etc…etc..)…and woman of  letters (a doctor of  ministry???)… why would she be celebrating something which has nothing at all to do with anything Biblical?

And want to make a video about her celebrating it?

Then the other thing that troubled me about the below video was this…

Now, I am not a drug person…and I know very little about drugs.  But one day someone was talking to me about a possible job…and another person who was already working for my family was present with me while the other person talked to me regarding the possibility of  being hired.     Well, following after that person had left, the other person who was with me…who already worked for our family… turned to me and said-

“Did you see how she was acting?”

I had no idea what she  was talking about…as I had noticed nothing.  But the other woman went on to say-

“You didn’t see how she kept on moving and didn’t stop?”

I said, “No.”

But once she had said it…I did note in the back of mind how much the woman while she was talking to me had kept moving her arms restlessly about…but it had not meant anything to me at the time.  But it had to the other woman who had been standing there near me looking on as the other woman talked with me.  She then commenced to begin to tell me that  the woman had to be on drugs.  She said-

“Only drug addicts act like that.”

And while I watched the below video of  Juanita Bynum that is what struck me…how she continuously keeps on moving.  Her movements seem erratic.   The working of her arms…hands… head… facial expressions… and body.

And I also noticed how seductive and cute-sie her movements appeared to be.  Almost like a clamous woman in a bar.  Now, I have seen 1 or 2  of  those  in my life time.  Never been one…but have seen them.  But on Dr.  Bynum’s part in the below video they seemed to be quite purposeful…as if  she wanted to entice someone.

However, I found it odd behavior all the way around.   And as I watched the video again…I noticed how she passed her hand across her nose (her new nose) …as I had once or twice seen people do who sniff cocaine (see that move in movies alot)…and she sniffles at least a few times in the below video.   Signs which had been pointed out to me by people who were familiar with such things…consistant signs of  someone  who sniffs cocaine.  

I may not know that much about drugs but clearly the odd behavior only heightened  by Juanita Bynum’s high level of  gaiety  in the below  video is questionable at best…not to mention the total subject matter about Valentine’s Day…and how she was going to celebrate it…etc…etc…  

It was everything but  godly?

Which prompted me to wonder why would a woman of  God want to produce such a video? 

And particularly about a holiday which clearly is not…for the most part godly.  But  created for lovers…and/or  want to be’s.

Clearly, the below video was not intended for anyone but her ex-husband.   Why else would anyone make such a fool of  themself  concerning  Valentine’s Day and their plans on celebrating it?

But he it seems has moved on.  The same advice I would give to  Juanita Bynum.

He recently purchased a warehouse in Atlanta and turned it into his new church and video/internet production house. 

And what did Juanita do?

She went back down to Atlanta and  is renting or purchased  her own warehouse…where she currently holds services.   And dubbed it  ‘The Warehouse’…and officially launched her leadership as a pastor over her own church.   But it is a far cry from the ex’s.  Obiviously his family indulges him…highly…as he is a third generation preacher…and his wife-to-be comes from a line of preachers too.    That  mixed with a little elbow-grease from his membership…lots of  elbow-grease by the video…they have really put together something.   CLICK BELOW until the video comes up…and ignore the text…if you want to see his new house of  worship.

Weeks’ new wife-to-be  looks very young though…but can’t find anything on her age.  And they seem to be seeking their fame and fortune over the internet.  When they marry it will be his 3rd marriage and her second.  And Juanita Bynum’s marriage to him was her 2nd.

http://www.news-record.com/content/2009/07/17/article/would_be_reality_star_finds_love_in_greensboro

To view the BELOW video just CLICK  the  SCREEN a FEW TIMES and  just  ignore the text.

I also have to admit to question much about  Juanita Bynum lately…as I am not familiar with her past history as a woman of God.  But I found it quite odd when she decided to put her wedding gown back on…and wheel that  very large diamond encrusted sword…proclaiming herself  to be ‘Juanita Bynum for the second time’…Juanita Bynum II.   It seemed more to me like she was marrying herself.  It was an odd ceremony.

The Bible says…then went in the man with 7  more spirits, and the latter state of that man was worst than his 1st.   And Peter said  it like this-

“It is better for a man to have not known him than to have known him and then return back to sin…like a dog to his own vomit.”

There is something out of sync here.

I am actually sadden by it…and hope that I am incorrect.   As  I really do hate to see people warring within themselves…and loosing the battle to things of  this world.

http://photos.essence.com/galleries/juanita_bynums_50th_birthday#95522

Update (September 1, 2009):  The date has been set…November 17th will be the wedding day for Bishop Week’s 3rd marriage…of  which he managed somehow to find his new bride over the internet…(what a joke…and crime against God). 

When he failed to get a TV deal for his bride-finding reality show (little wonder why following his wife abuse charges).   Then decided to air his hunt over the internet…hence, his new bride.  

I think his plan is to try to make her bigger than Juanita Bynum…since Bishop Week’s claims that he made Juanita Bynum.  And he is indeed trying hard.

Is Juanita big??????   

http://www.christinaglenn.com/

Little wonder their marriage didn’t last…it was highly fawled…and so were they.  And the real tragedy was that they taught their mess to people who believed what they were preaching.  False teaching.

Today I messed up my book trailer and I am so upset.  Now, I will have to go back into the lab and re-work it.  It had been coming along so well… until I decided to rush things…and there in went the cause of  my problem.   Now everything looks like I’m rushing through it from frame to frame.   Which is exactly what I did do…because before I had thought that all the clips were a bit  too slow.   And now they are the reverse.  

Oh, well…I will learn.  That is the thing about me I sometimes find myself re-learning old lessons…and it always costs me time.   

So yes…I’m still working on my book trailer  and plugging to officially start plugging  my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE.     But it is just about ready for youtube.    Then I will be back to completing my radio spot…and finally finish up with the pages for my web site.  Soon and very soon…   It  is coming.

 Well, enjoy your day tomorrow.   And my  hot flashes are still going strong.   Oh, well… 

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

Happened to come across this on youtube and it touched me.

You’re pretty for a black girl???

In this the 21st Century…I would have hoped that we were far from the backward thinking of yesterday…all of  us.  But particularly black folk…or so called black folk.   You know when we walked around trying not to be black…afraid to show our napps and kinks.

You do remember yesterday?  

You know the time when …when if  you were white  you were alright.  Light and you could  just get by…or wasn’t as dark as the brown paper bag…and your hair wasn’t too short…too kinky…or your lips too big.

After all these years…and throughout history we have yet to get over not loving who we are.  And what makes it so really bad…we can’t even see that the rest of world wishes they were us.

If  the truth be known…for better or for worst…we set the fashion trends…style…language patterns… music…dance… and almost everything.   And not only here in this country…but around the world as well.

Western Culture…is definitely highly rooted in the black culture of this country.

So, then why do we feed in to this…I hate me…or can’t find a good black man… or can’t  find a good black woman lie?

It is a lie…because I am a good black woman…and I know I’m not all by myself. And I also believe that there are just as many good and decent black man.

I will never buy into the hype that the reason so many black men and women are preferring to date outside of our race…is because they can’t find someone good in it.  That is a lie.  

I would really like to know just where they have been looking?

The bars…and  prison?

If you seek out junk…then you will find junk.

And if  you seek junk…don’t expect it to step up…to being anything else.   But junk.

I know someone…a black woman…a bit younger than myself…who I used to think of as being smart.  Until one day she said to me that she was  involved with someone who is an addict…and he has been this way for years.

Now, she has her own business… is in the church…but.   She says she loves the guy….that he is a good person.    She says…she is willing to wait on him with the hope that he will straighten out his life.  

And with God’s help…that could happen.

But has anybody ever heard of  being  unevenly yoked?

What if  he never gets his life straight?

And there you are…sitting around all these years…hoping and praying…and sexing it up with somebody who may never be able to be anything real in your life…outside of what he already is.   An addict. 

I don’t know if this is still true or not…but when this whole thug culture was being hyped up…I could not believe the number of decent women…and who I thought were intelligent black woman… talking about they wanted a thug.

“I want me a thug.”

What????

Were they crazy?

A what???

A thug?

I guess that is what Vivica Fox wanted when she hooked up with half-a-dollar.

It got even worstt when I went to hear Nikki Giovanni…and she flashed her tatoo…a large…very large…marking…a tattoo on the inside of  one of  her arms reading….”THUG LIFE.”    At 60 something years of age…I felt she had lost her mind talking about celebrating that lifestyle.  Of what...men beating their women…neglecting their children…etc…  And having sex with anything moving…and dis-respecting women with a bunch of  misogynistic lyrics…loaded with the N-word from start to finish…and a bunch of  other filth.

What is there to celebrate about someone playing like he’s a thug?

“Ahhh…come on now, Nikki.”

In the above video Oprah says that 70% of  black women are not married because “there are not just as many black men out there.”  Meaning that the earth is populated with more black women than black men.   I debate this highly…simply because it is not true.  Since we were created by God…and He is and has always been a God of  balance.  He would never have created more of one sex over another.  And particularly since He…Himself  said-

“Be fruitful and multiply.”

And He would not have said that…to go against His own laws against adultery and fornication…by creating a shortage of any one sex to the other. 

All through nature there is balance between the sexes.  Why would it be any different for man?

I think that people make all kind of excuses to accommodate their choices.  In the earlier days of  black stars in this country (of which most of them had white husbands or wives)…they claimed that it was that they could not find anyone black equal to who they were…being that great singer or actor or actress… or musicans etc.  that they were.   Today they  certainly could not make the same claim since many African-American people excel in all areas from business to sports to entertainment to entrepreneurship…and ministry too.  

In churches all across this country today there are plenty of  black millionaires lining church pews and pulpits…and not  just in the church.   (But doesn’t Pearl Bailey and Queen Latifah look very much alike?)

So, nobody can tell me that there are not enough good or decent black folk around…of both sexes to go around.  Just a couple of weeks ago I was at a very large church convention called AIM in Tampa, Fl…and I never once saw an im-balance between the black men and women…or teens…and children that were there of   either sex.  And they packed the Tampa Bay area coming from everywhere across this country and outside of  it.

I think that media is to blame for starting the rumor that women out number  men.  Since in the beginning…media like most of everything else was male dominated.   Men love to justify certain behavior.    So, why not create a lie like saying-

“Women out number us.  So, therefore we are allowed to have as many of them as we would like.”

All through history you see women being used as sexual objects…and with men having multiple wives…or harems.   Yet, when you see pictures of those times, art, and readings from early times…they do not reflex a lesser number of  men to women.  If anything…it seemed as though the opposite were true. 

So, shows like the above  segment on the Oprah Winfrey Show only legitimized that lie for many people.  Vast number of people have always believed  it.  But now because Oprah said it…that makes it true.  Not so.  

It is very much the same as saying that there is a ‘gay gene’ …therefore, gay people can’t help being gay.  That too is a lie.  There is no ‘gay gene.’   Gay people are not a freak of  nature.  But there are some scientist who claim that this is true…and falsely want to lay claim to this based upon some bogus laboratory discovery.

What it rally all gets down to… is  what do you want to believe?

You can choose to believe lies…falsehoods…or choose to believe the truth. 

But no matter what…black is beautiful…even for a black girl.

CLICK the LINK BELOW to see the video…it is sad to the level of  self-hate due to their dark conplexion.

http://www.mwza.com/tyra-banks-show-black-women-their-children-bleaching-their-skin/

It is amazing the number of women, men and children is this country and abroad…from the Caribbean Islands to Europe…and Africa…who are running to blench their skin.  Many without any knowledge of the vast risk to their health or  life…not to mention that  the chemicals in the blenching creams are toxic and can destroy the person’s face and body over a period of time.

It is a mystery how many of  us would have loved to have been born darker…and those darker…some of  them least ways…and I guess many…since the blenching cream market has grown so big.  It is truly a shame that  so many would want so badly to be lighter.   And would destroy their beautiful natural complexions trying to undo what God has  so richly and generously blessed them with. 

In listening to the videos above…it all mostly stemmed from feelings that they felt that lighter skin meant better treatment…better jobs…status etc…   All of  which really stems…from lack of respect of  yourself… your capabilities… and how you preceive yourself.   Preception of  one’s self  is a great thing…it can hinder you …or sky rocket you into excelling high levels in life…whether others believed you could…or not.

Personally…I have never felt that anything was more beautiful than being black.  I may have never liked what I personally looked like (in terms of my facial stuff)…or my size…but I have always liked being black…and black features.

Beauty…is us…in all of  our  varying shades.   It’s really what makes us so much more interesting than all the other group of people in the world.  We’ve got variety, baby…and lots of it…and in all kinds of ways.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/aug/08/celebrity.race?gusrc=rss&feed=worldnews

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/talking_point/africa_have_your_say/8095882.stm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7244374.stm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/8148719.stm

They say a picture says a 1,000 words.  If  this picture could speak what would it say?

I think…it would say-

“I’m not happy.”

In comparing this picture with some of  Michael’s earlier pictures before any of the surgery… you can see that he not only hated his skin color…but his lips…hair… nose…chin… and I guess just about everything else about himself.    How very sad.   And even worst…what he did to himself  thinking he could improve upon what  God had already blessed him with.

Thank you so much, Aisha for posting your video on youtube.  You are not only pretty…but fasinatingly beautiful…and a highly intelligent young black woman.  Your husband must marvel every time he looks…at his queen.  I know you must be an equally wonderful mother…because you possess all the right tools to having a beautiful and  successful loving family.

Take a peak at Ethiopian Sara Nuru…Germany’s next top model…and perhaps the world.

And yes…I’m still plugging  my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE.    In fact…I better get some sleep now…so I can get up early in the morning and get out to go work on my book trailer some more…which I will post here as well as on youtube.  Soon and very soon…   It  is coming.

 Well, enjoy your day tomorrow.  Finally…some sun…but  lots of  humidity too.  Plus I have hot flashes…oh, well… 

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

Finally, I am up and out.

We just flew back in from Tampa on Sunday afternoon, and I have been drained of  any energy every since.  I have barely eaten a thing.   All I have wanted was sleep…and more sleep.  But finally today I decided that maybe I needed to get out and get some fresh air to clear out the cob-webs from all that compressed air I was forced to breath in during our flight down and back from Florida.  And maybe…just maybe…I was right.

I feel better already.

Florida was beautiful.  It rained most of the time while we were down there.  But I loved every minute of it anyway. 

My plan was to write my blogs during the evening while laying around in the hotel…as we were in Tampa for the AIM conference with our church.   But our hotel did not have a business room where I could access a computer for free.   Instead they had an UPS store with computers that could be rented at a rate of  59¢ per minute.  Needless to say, I was livid.  And my son had failed to bring our lap-top computer on the trip. 

So, it meant that during this whole Michael Jackson thing…and Palin resignation…and the whole of the 4th of July weekend…I had been computerless.  And unable to voice any opinions on anything to anyone accept to the walls of  my hotel room…how boring.

So, alas…I am happy for this opportunity to be able to once again feel the rugged curves of  the keys of my keyboard.  And now able to voice my voice…but I have forgotten what it was that I had wanted to say.

Though through the whole week last week…I had much to voice…I now, however, find that maybe I am just too tired to say anything.  Though I did think that Palin has committed political suicide…not to mention that there most be something bigger behind her quick decision to resign at this time.   And then… frankly, I believe Michael may have been murdered.

If  Michael was in the mental state that those around him claimed that he was in…then any contract signed by him for 50 concert dates would be null and void…as he was not mentally competent to sign anything.  My other point to this is…is this.   When an artist signs a contract…and particularly an performing artist like a Michael Jackson…the promoters would have insured him.

I am curious just how much the owners of the Staple Center in LA had Michael insured for…as they were the ones promoting the 50 concerts in England.

My second point…is this.  No talent in their right mind would have ever signed a contract for 50 consecutive concert dates.  Most entertainers can barely make it though a couple weeks of  performing without becoming exhausted. 

At 50 years of  age there was no way that any out of shape performer who had not been on the road or on stage for at lease 8 to 10 years…such as Michael… could have possibly pulled off  the 50 concerts that Michael Jackson was said to have been booked for.  Not without battling complete exhaustion and/or possibly killing himself  by dropping dead on stage while attempting to do it.  

It was simply an impossible fete that even the King of Pop would not have been able to pull off.

Had Michael died during the time of  his rehersals for his 50 concert gig…it would have meant a big pay day for the promoters of his supposed 50 concert dates.   Had he died while on the road or any time during his 50 concerts…also meant a big pay day for his promoters.  And having died while under contract…which Michael was…also meant a tremendous pay day for the concert promoters of his 50 concerts.

But had Michael gotten up on the stage and not been able to fulfil his concert dates…for reasons due to exhaustion…burn-out…fatigue…drugs…etc.    This would have meant financial disaster for the promoters…and demands for rememburstments for all tickets of the shows which had to be cancelled.  Something which no promoters wishes to ever face.

http://www.michaeljacksonlive.com/memory.php

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29676050

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/29676991#29676991

Michael Jackson’s untimely demise has left many questions.  And among them are questions as to whether or not Michael superseded the law in the aquisition of  his children?

In perhaps, the biggest baby-mama drama ever…if  Michael had aquired the first 2 children, Price Michael and Paris, legally…then why had they not been legally adopted by him?

No legitimate lawyer would have allowed that to get pass him or her.   He or she would have counseled Michael on the merits of  legalizing those children as being his.  And it would have had to have gone through Probate Court.

Then there is the issue of  Blanket.  

What happened to his mother?

Why is she not named on the birth certificate for the child?

Was this legal?

Since Blanket had to have come from some woman…or girl…somewhere…who was she…and what happened to her?   As  Blanket did not  just materialized out of the  air and just came to be.  Why was his mother’s name omitted from her son’s birth certificate?

I have never heard of any such a thing before…and the matter really sounds quite fishy to me.

The lawyer…or lawyers involved in Michael’s acquisition of  his children really should be questioned…because it seems to me that they…or he…or she…overstepped some boundries of the law.   Even though California laws vary so much from other states…perhaps it was all legal and aboard board.   But I think not.

Having money you get whatever you want.  And I think that Michael Jackson having money managed to find the right people who for a nickle or a dime would deliver to him whatever he wanted. 

And in the end…it is those very people who you cannot ever trust.

So, it is not a mystery to me…that papa Joseph is crying foulplay in the untimely death of  his son, Michael Jackson.  It is sad and becomes highly unsafe for anyone who becomes worth more dead than alive.

We await the autopsy.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1196332/Michael-Jackson-Debbie-Rowe-biological-parents-of-children.html

Hope that you are enjoying this weather.

I got up early this morning to read my Bible on my mother’s very large front porch.  The sound of the birds chirping and feel of the early morning breezy on a beautiful sunny summer morning…made it an absolutely beautiful experience.  Just me…my Bible…and the beauty of the Lord.

Enjoy your day.

I am still twiddling my tumbs waiting on the publishers to finish…but the hold up this time is kind of my fault…in that because of the money I had already put out to publish my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE.  You know when I gave over 2 grand to Xulon Press…which I go into more in-depth in another blog…and got nothing back in return.  So, when I finally decided upon another company…I had to do it on a payment plan because I just did not have all the money to pay for the printing of  my book all at once.  Which was really one of the main reasons I chose the company that I finally decided upon. 

Four payments in the amount of $175 for the package that I chose…which with a special they were running gave me 20 advance copies of my book for free.  And they should have given me something out of the deal…as I had done all the work for my book including designing  my cover and the layout of my interior pages…plus the editing of the my text, as well…which what has been the hold up. 

I just keep finding another error…and I am such a perfectionist.  It would kill me not to put out a work that is not quality.  So, please continue to bare with me.  THE BISHOP’S WIFE will soon be out and available for your purchase soon.    the time when my book will soon be made available for sale.  God is good…I am so happy to finally  have gotten it done and out…and into the final stage of the process…besides getting out to aid in selling it.

And I am still working hard on my book trailer for ‘youtube’ too…and my radio promo.  All of  which I shall premiere right here on my blog site first.

 Well, enjoy the rest of your day and I have so much more to tell you.  It’s coming. 

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

I was hoping to go to bed early tonight.  Didn’t get in until after 2 AM last night.  Had the opportunity to go into New York for the 2nd night of the funeral of the God Father of  Gospel Music, Rev. Timothy Wright.   And what an event it was.  I am still happy that we decided to go. 

It was a musical program celebrating the music and musical legacy and influence of  Dr. Timothy Wright.  So, some of everybody in gospel music was there and performed including a combined choir of 23 choirs…comprising 1,200 voices.  So, if you can imagine that…then you have a clue of  the kind of evening we had last night…and it was free and open to public.  On top of  it…it was very well organized…and had a super sound system which wasn’t anything outside of what that church already had.   And was like being in the Appollo Theater…it had to have been a converted movie theater.

So, from Ty Tribbett, to Rev. Milton Biggham, Myrna Summers, Timoney Figueroa, Hezekiah Walker & Love Fellowship Choir, Vershawn Mitchell,  Keith Wonder Boy, Maurette Brown, Judieth McAllister…and many manyothers performed…a host of them.  And it was fabulous…each and everyone of  them.  I am still glowing from that service in honor of  the God Father of  Gospel Music, Rev. Timothy Wright…a man I really feel was not given the real honor that his music deserved…during the course of  his life.  But he never complained…he continued writing… producing… performing and preaching to the glory of God.   Truly, a fabulous man…and a real lover of  his church…and God.   Faithful…

It shocked me the Saturday, last July when we woke up to a bunch of text messages saying Rev. Timothy Wright had met with a tragic automobile accident which took the life of  his wife and only grand son…leaving him paralyzed and mostly hospitalized until he passed just recently.  From one moment to the next…we never know what is going to happen in our life.

Earlier that evening I had stopped by Rev. Wright’s booth at AIM, in Detroit…he had just been down a few booths and to the opposite of the aisle from  Vicki Winans’   booth.   He was autographing his book while cheerfully beaconing  passerbyers to stop at his booth.

I will not forget how I had stood there telling him how great he looked…and how happy I was to see that he was doing so well healthwise…as the last time I had seen him was when I had booked him to performed at my summer outreach program called, Ministry Under the Tent.  He was not feeling well at all…but yet he travelled from New York to perform before the people here who are still talking about that show…and weekend.

Because I could see that that he was not feeling well that day…as he was dietetic…I said to him-

“If you only sing one song I’ll be okay with that.”

That’s what I told him.

But when he hit that stage with his 30 choir members…you would not have been able to tell how he had been suffering prior to performing.  And he kept on going like the Energized Bunny.  They really performed…and sounded just like the CD’s.

So, it was good to see him in Detroit doing so well health-wise…and I just kept saying it over and over…and the following morning…

To tell you seriously I felt guilty…as though I had caused that accident myself…having  raved so much about how good  Rev. Wright  had looked that Saturday afternoon.  But a car coming up onto the inter-state highway travelling in the wrong direction ran right into his car…head-on… and Rev. Timothy Wright’s life was forever changed that night.

I was shocked…his life had been turned upside down in the flash of a moment.  He had just finished performing in a large gospel concert with Mary Mary, the Clark Sisters, Ricky Dillard etc…and in a quick flash of a moment…his career had come to a end.   He lost his wife and grand son…and very nearly lost his own life in less than 6 hours since the time I had spoken with both him and his wife as they worked their booth with their grand son. 

D.U.I…driving under the influence of alcohol or anything else…is a serious problem…and it is highly dangerous and deadly to us all.  The same roadway that that accident occured was the exact highway we had to travel on later in order for us to get back home from Detroit too.  Any one of us could have met up with that driver.  It should not take until something happens to one of  us that we rally to do something about drivers who continue to  get behind the wheel knowing that they are incapable of  doing so properly or safely. 

It is sad to think about what ended up happening to Rev. Timothy Wright and his family due a driver driving under the influence…who also ended up killing himself…by not only traveling in the wrong direction.   But also travelling at a  very high speed.

Needless to say…I was happy to hear that he was no longer suffering…and trying to deal with his loses.  Yes, I was happy that he was no longer suffering from the loses in his personal life…and his physical being.

He was so gracious and so kind…when I called him…he never even asked me to sign a contract…didn’t  have to wire him any up-front money…which is highly out of  the norm.   But that is what he did…just said have the money ready when he got there.  And I did…and all cash.  I have done many shows…and never had anyone been so trusting. 

I  have been involved in both concert promotions and other large events as a promoter for both R&B  and religious concerts and events…but never had 1 entertainer… agent… manager… or other person that I  booked for an event  of any type…not  require me to sign a contract and to send some money in advance…which is typically the way that it is done.   And I am sure that through his many years in the industry…I am sure that Rev. Wright has probably had his share of  problems with promoters…yet  he did not require me to sign or forward him anything…for some reason.  Though I asked him…and he said-

“No,  just have it ready when I get there.”

I marvel at that even to this day.   And I made sure that everything for him was set and ready for him when the bus I had hired for them pulled into town and they poured off of it. 

And I cannot thank enough the Chamblee Bus Company out of  Newark, New Jersey…who at 1 AM in the morning the night before Rev.  Wright was to perform… they got me a bus and a driver…after the initial bus company I had hired for the job…to pick up Rev. Wright and his choir in Brooklyn…called me to say that they were not coming.   I marvel at that too…God worked it out in the wee hours of  the morn.   And all ended up being  just  fine…better than fine.

As I sat there listening to all those performers and expeditors…and listened to the new group of  radio gospel announcers in New York City now…my mind drifted back to all the years that I have played his music…and still do…and how he had come to perform here at Ministry Under the Tent…and I couldn’t help but cry a bit from time to time.

Following all the singing…Pastor Hubert Powell was allowed a few seconds to speak…and wow did he deliver.  I wish I could write it like he said it…but I can’t.  But he and the God Father of  Gospel Music, Rev. Timothy Wright, had been friends for over 50 years.  And I do not think…and would find it very hard to believe…that anybody who ever met him…didn’t meet somebody who they did ot like and love in the person of  Rev. Timothy Wright.  He was truly a man of  God…who got his start up under the Father of Gospel Music…James Cleveland.  

As I stated…I had decided not to write anything tonight.  I could barely keep my eyes open earlier…but while checking on some things over the internet…I came across a couple of stories which really motivated me to begin to write this blog.

The first was a story on Jesse Jackson.  I find him to be so disappointing.   Not atall the person I thought him to be.  I guess it is hard to accept when people do not meet  your expectations of  who you believe them to be…based upon your media knowledge of  them…meaning news items that you read.  

Throughout all the years all the information on Jesse Jackson had been positive…up until the story of  the illegitimate baby…and that open mic story hit the news…where Jesse…  Well, you know the story (wrote about it in 2 other blogs if  you to read that story)…how Jesse said he wanted to cut off  Obama’s…  Well…you know the story.   Until that point my preception of  Rev. Jesse Jackson had been one of  him being what he actively projected…and that is what it was a “projection”...that he was a dedicated black leader…who sincerely loved and cared for his people.

Now, reading this story further adds to my ever decreasing opinion of  Jesse Jackson.  Currently, he is being sued for $100,000 by the AEI Speakers Bureau for failing to show up at a speaking engagement in Trinidad…after…now check this out… after he had the conference promoters  charter him a private jet to transporthim from Chicago to Trinidad for the speaking engagement…and demanding a fee of $75,000 to come and speak at the event.  And I thought  Aretha Franklin’s $65,000 fee plus a portion of the gate was excessive.  Well,  it was a bit too rich for my blood…but at least she was worth the money.  I just couldn’t afford it.

Can you imagine that?

Seventy-five thousand dollars to have Jesse Jackson come to speak at a conference engagement.  And an engagement in a poor country…run by black people?

And then force them to book  him a private chartered jet?

Can you imagine the type of  hotel accommodations Jesse must have requested…5 star plus…no doubt.

They deserve to sue him.  And I hope they get every dime.  What a ridiculously greedy man.    He is definitely too full of   himself.

For the same event Rev.  Al Sharpton and Martin L. King the third were also  booked to participate…both of  whom who flew regular commercial fligts into Trinidad.

I have to admit to having read years ago while in New York…that Jesse’s Wall Street Summit was nothing but one big corporate shake-down…in the name of  black people. 

Can you imagine  Jesse Jackson getting rich on our backs?

Playing all these years…like something he has never been.  Really interested in black people…and the social injustices surrounding them.  And trying to get to get them irraticated.  When in fact…he has always been out for Jesse…at the pretense of  aiding the plight of  black people in this country. 

The Bible says…what is done in the dark will come to light.  Meaning anything that is not true…will in time be unveiled…revealed.   Jesse Jackson can truly speak to the words of  this scripture…as more and more is being revealed about him.

Now…on to Michael Steele, the chairman of  the Republican National commitee…another foolish black man…along the vain of a Clarence Thomas. 

It is sad really.

We are living in a season now…   Oh, well…come on lets grow up.    We do not have go running around and cow-tauing and bowing down to everybody.   Give me a break.   I hate ignorance…and particularly from those who want to pretend that are above others…in terms of  their intellect…place in life…etc…etc…  But they don’t know who they are…or they forget where they come from…or how to love what is their’s…namely their own people while trying to pretend to be somebody else.   And also loose their dignity by acting and talking foolishly.

Every group loves their own people…that is only natural.  And anybody who doesn’t…then something is wrong with them. 

Loving your own group doesn’t  mean that you have feel that your group is superior…smarter…or better than any other group…or have ideas of  bigotry.  No, it  just means you are proud in who you are. 

But that group called the Republicans…particularly that group of  ignorant and narrow minded black folk in that party…like Clarence Thomas, Alan Kayes…and now this Michael Steele.  This Mike Steele recently, while sitting in of  radio program chatting with a caller who had called in to discuss Barack Obama…Michael Steele made  the statement that media created Barack Obama.

What kind of dumb statement was that?

Media did not create Barack Obama…as if  he was the figment of  someone’s imagination.   Media definitely did not create Barack Obama…they chased Barack Obama because he was the story that people were interested in.  And that is what media does…they make their living tracking down stories that people want to hear and read.   That is the name of  the  business…or if  you will…the game.

Barack Obama is not a splash in a pan…he was not created by a bunch of  handlers…any more than Solomon or David was.  Media did not create  Tiger Woods…or  Michael Jordan…or  Muhammad Ali…or  Jack Nicolas…Princess Diana…or even Dr. Martin L. King, Jr…or Bobby Kennedy or Jack Kennedy, his older brother also known as  President John F. Kennedy.   Destiny did…and their talents did.

So, how foolish is it  for a supposed black man to try to down rate another black man by saying-

“Oh, he wouldn’t be nothing  if media hadn’t created him.”

Because that is exactly what Steele said…though he may not have said it in those exact words.  But  it spoke every bit of  envy.

Media did not create Barack Obama…but it could said that it assist  in informing people about him.  But the same could be said for any movie star…singing star…atlete…or anyone or anything of  interest to the masses.   That is what media does… it  informs.

Too bad Mr. Steele, an ex-governor,  is not the kind of  Republican that Col. Colin Powell is.     Col. Powell is capable of  celebrating and appreciating the abilities and achievements…and excellence of those  inside, as well as, outside of  his own party affiliation and race…and so too Obama. 

Too bad the former governor lacks their skills.

I am beginning to wonder if the excitement of the moment is starting to ware off for the Obama’s.  Living your life in a bubble cannot be fun.  Everything you do…say or wear…gets questions. 

Who would like that?

I personally do not understand all the questions about the dog…Michelle clothes…her sneakers…etc… 

I am not really a sneaker person…but in New York they are rave…and I guess everywhere else too.  But with most sneakers ranging far above Pro-Keds back in the day…which were $10…I feel that all sneakers are seriously over priced.  And as far as I can see most of them if you want a good pair are over $100.

So, then I do not understand the problem with the cost of  Michelle’s sneakers costing over $500 as most sneakers cost $200 and more.  Or maybe…the fuss was just over Michelle wearing those sneakers to some charity event…but men wear Stacy Adams shoes…and other people wear a bunch of  expensive footware today…and nobody is calling to question their shoes…or  sneakers.

In looking at the pictures of  their date night…to think that was the first walk that they have taken together free of  anybody being right up on them.  I don’t know…but I find that rather sad.   The joy of  life seems to be stolen from them.  It is the cost of fame I guess…and certainly the cost of  becoming the President, First Lady and First Family of  the United States. 

I would take my life over  their’s anyday.   But it is a sacrifice that they willingly went  into…because they felt that they could offer their service to help make this a better country.  And for that I applaud them…and feel for them. 

Nobody ever questioned the price tag of everything or anything that  Jackie Kennedy wore.   In fact, the rich never talk about price.  They have this saying-

“If  you have to ask the price then you really can’t afford it.”

Oh, I know what it is.  

Jackie “O”  never wore sneakers…only terribly expensive clothes…jewelry…and shoes.    And there were no questions about them or their price tags.

http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.jsp?articleId=281474977673088&grpId=3659174697241980&nav=Groupspace

http://blog.georgetownvoice.com/2009/05/03/obamas-have-date-night-at-citronelle-in-georgetown/

http://news.aol.com/article/obama-date-night/459991

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30548300/

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/30548045#30548045

Well, since it is now 2 AM again…and I was hoping to try to catch up on my sleep as I am trying to put the finishing touches on my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE,  promo for youtube…and I am becoming frustrated with my new book publishers.  It seems that they can’t get my errors corrected properly for some reason. 

Since my book had been back and forth to my former publisher…I did not have many errors this time around.  But as few as they have been…I have received the galley back  4 times with almost the same errors not having been corrected.  And I mean glearing errors that leap out at you…but evidently they do not to the person who is suppose to be setting my type and making these corrects.

I am beginning to come of a mind…that this whole self-publishing thing is for the birds.  That it probably doesn’t matter who you get…there will be problems.

Well,  I’ll keep you posted.  I really have to get some sleep now.  I’ve got to get up and out early…a lot of work yet to be done.   And the clock is ticking.

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

Well, we  are just getting back in from our weekend little road trip.  The weather was beautiful all the way down and back…90’s, baby…and felt like it.

One of my nephews preached his first sermon in his very own church this past Sunday…and we all went down to be with him for his opening ceremony…a monumental Christian event…in a place where I could see he was much needed.  In Wilmington, DE…which is a much bigger place than I ever expected and has a very sizable amount of  black folk.

While there I could not help but marvel at most of the homes…which were mostly made of stone and brick.  They looked very historic…and I remembered that Delaware was an old State that has a very long and rich history due to George Washington having travelled and stayed there.  And I could see that many of those homes dated back to that period in history…and had been well kept up and cared for through their long history…and still are.

But Wilmington reminded me of  Detroit except for one distinct difference…there were no boarded up homes or boarded up businesses there…as far as I could see.   Very much to the contrary was it to the situation in Detroit…in which as I stated in an earlier blog on Detroit…every other building and house was boarded up there due to foreclosures, down-sizing and massive job losses.   Detroit was consumed by boarded up and vacated buildings and homes due to the shutting down of  many of the factory jobs of  its chief industry and job producers…the Big 3…the motor industry.  And it looked every bit of  it.

But contrary to Detroit…it seemed to me that Wilmington’s future was bright…the city that sits back off of  I-95…but not too far off…just far enough off the main North Eastern throughway so you can’t see it.

But who knew that was really back there…down that short stretch of road where the signs lead you over to.

Little had and is ever said about Wilmington, DE.  But then I remembered as I glanced across and looked at the old beautiful mansions that our Vice President, Joe Biden and his family,  also lives here…in that quiet little place which isn’t really all that little…and certainly not little at all compared to where I come from.  Just 20 minutes South of Philly and not far from Baltimore…Wilmington really struck me as a great place to invest in…if you could find property to buy.

It has all the pluses… Wilmington… including sitting on the banks of the Delaware River...you do remember that great picture they had in your history book of  Washington standing on that boat looking very regal and General-like as he crossed the Delaware.  It is funny the things you will remember years later from when you were a little grade school child sitting in various classes at school…of which none of  it meant anything to you at the time.  You just had to rememorize it because of the test tomorrow…and that was the only reason you placed it somewhere in your memory bank.   Who knew 20-30-40-50-60 years later you would still be able to pull up and access that information stored somewhere in your brain?

This is why education is so important.  Nothing in school ever seemed important to me.  Teachers failed to be able to show the true value of why you should learn something.  For some reason they cannot link anything that you do in school with real living.  And then later in life you find out that it was all relevant to your everyday living.  Like learning how to get up and go to school.   Relevance: Getting up and going to work.   If you never learned how to get up and get out to school on time you will certainly have problems at getting up and getting out to work on time.   Therefore, it is relevant to real everyday living.

(2) Math…this is a big one (well, learning to get up and go to school was big too…)   Relevance: Being able to keep track of your money…count your change…add up your groceries before you get into line…monitor your daily spending and align it with your budget and your pay check etc…   I told you it was big.   But for some reason teachers cannot appropriately inform students of the real value of learning math.  There is not one kid…or child…or teen in school who doesn’t like money…and if  they realized that math had something to do with money there would not be one student failing math.

Well, I guess you can tell that I am really tired from our trip to Delaware the place where George…oh, never mind…I’ve already said it…how he crossed that river and made history right there in that little…well…not so little town.   Yeah…I am real tired.

When we were through in Delaware…my son and I hit Philly.   I could not get so close and not drop by and visit with the true matriarch of our family…my mother’s Aunt Kate.

Having talked often with Aunt Kate…it was not hard for me to tell when I first realized her mind was not as sharp as usual.  You used to could say a name and she filled in all the blanks.  I loved talking with her…and each time I learned more and more about our family.  Her mother…was my grand-mother’s mother.  She was a woman who had somehow ended up owning a very large portion of  land…and I do mean very large.  It ran along the shores and back a ways off from Lake Okeechobee, the 2nd largest lake in the United States…2nd only to Lake Michigan.

I found this out once during one of our last annual summer trips to Florida…when suddenly my mother began crying saying-

“You see this land it all belonged to my grand-mother.”

I was surprised…as my mother rarely became so emotional over such things…and certainly not out of the blue as she had that day.  As many times as we had passed through that little town and across that bridge heading over to where I was born and where my grand-mother at the time stilled lived…my mother had never before said anything regarding the size or proportion of any of  that land.

That day she told us that as far as we could see and as far back as we had just come…how it had all belonged to our  great grand-mother.  I had not realized until that moment that seeing where this town now absorbed all of what had been our family’s property…nor had I  realized that seeing it as we drove pass it sadden my mother so until that day…as she sobbed loudly over her grand-mother’s property.  She had spoken of  it before but never had I any idea of  the vast amount of property that was involved.

It is from that moment that I started paying more attention to those programs that I saw on PBS about black families going back through city records and trying to regain property which had been stolen away from their families during the mid-40’s through the 50’s…which included very large farm lands…by various people in those towns who simply just re-wrote the deeds to those black people’s property…giving themselves ownership over it without even bothering to purchase the property from any of the black families.

Very little has ever been said about my great grand-mother except for how extremely religious of a woman she was.  But Aunt Kate had began sharing with me more about her.  She told me of her giving nature…and how she had owned a restaurant.   She told me that there had been people during the course of my great grand-mother’s restaurant business who could not afford to pay for the food…but she fed them anyway.  She had even opened up the doors to her home and raised a child or 2 which was not her own…because they had been homeless.

“One little boy,” Aunt Kate said was a friend of one her brothers…whom they had found out that when they thought he would leave to go home…that he was actually sleeping down under their house.

Aunt Kate said, “Well, mother, wasn’t going to let him stay down there.”

She raised him along with her own children.  He became another brother to our Aunt Kate and my grand-mother along with their other siblings.

Back in those days the houses in those areas of Florida were built raised up off the ground and sat upon concrete blocks.   This was how they built all the houses back then down in Florida…raised up off the ground because of flooding.   If the waters came up over the banks of Lake Okeechobee…it was hoped that they would not rise above the height of the concrete blocks.

Because Zora Neale Huston stayed in my great grand-mother’s area once upon a time…in fact, her book “Their Eyes Were Watching God”…takes place in a little town sitting on Lake Okeechobee.  Imagine my great grand-mother being the great land Baroness that she was…and owner of  the black folk’s only restaurant in that town…and just based on how folks lived down there…and still do…I imagine that they…my great grand-mother and Zora Neale Hurston may have known each another.  Nobody lives in any of those little towns without knowing everybody…so much so…that they all become very much like family…caring and knowing everything about everyone and everything about them.

But Aunt Kate now being the last of all her sibling…out of 10 of them…was my source for much family history…which seemed to just pour out of her.  I never had to ask any questions of her or try to coax her into sharing it with me…very unlike my own grand mother…who always seemed suspicious if  you asked anything about  our family history.  Why I do not know…but it was something that I accepted thinking that perhaps there was something which I should not know.

But upon seeing Aunt Kate for the first time in years…I was somewhat surprised.  She was much smaller now…though she had never been a big woman as she always kept herself up, as they say…meaning she always kept herself  looking good and in good condition.  But she wasn’t looking so good yesterday…most of her hair had thinned out…and she had this large black…what looked like smut smudge straight across her forehead.  She had on no shoes or slippers on…of which I had never seen her walk  around barefooted before…as Aunt Kate was quite prime and proper.    And her feet were terribly ashy…meaning…well…you can look that one up…as I do not want nor wish to continue talking about my aunt in such a way.

But it was her mind…the thing most recently I had noticed in the last few phone calls we had had…her mind was slipping.   She was not getting lost…but she had started forgetting things…and who such and such was…when she had always been so sharp about such things.

Aunt Kate was now in her 90’s…and though throughout all of these years age had somehow managed to not show up on her…yesterday was different.  She seemed older than her 90 in fact…and she was now walking with a cane.  That strong little woman was now…an aged shadow of  what she had been…and though I smiled and was happy to see and talk with her and my cousins…it was hard for me not to notice the vast difference in our Aunt Kate yesterday…from the Aunt Kate I had last seen just about 3 years ago and throughout all the prior years.

I often think of  the little church mothers in our church…woman who proudly proclaim their ages with such glee…because none of them looks anything near the age that they truly are.  They are strong and fit…able to get onto and off  buses…walk around their blocks…run errands on their own.   There is a distinct difference between them and women who are not in the church.  And it is very recognizable.

Though her mother had been an extremely religious woman…Aunt Kate may have been…and may still be quasi-religious.   Until a few years ago…Atlantic City had become her friend.  She had gotten bitten by that bug…called gambling.   And if someone had not stolen some money from her…she still might be going…as it had become a weekly habit for her.

I really do believe that there is something about being in the church…and living a life separate from the ways of the world that will make a difference in your life…as witnessed by the many mothers who are in various churches around the world.  There is just something about trusting and living your life as God intends you to live it…that will make a difference.

Yes, I am tired…but I am so thankful that God gave me the opportunity yesterday to finally go and visit with my very kind and loving Aunt Kate…through all the years this has never changed about her.  I suspect that it comes from her mother.

There is little wonder that Obama’s approval rating for his first 100 days has been and is high…as he is actively pursuing to achieve exactly what he went into the White House knowing what he had and needed…and said he would do.  Handle the business of the American people…and try to undo and dark mark the Bush Administration had put upon this country.  And thus far…as my father would say…he has been doing  just fine.  But what I really like is the fact that the dynamic duo which we put into the White House are both getting high marks.

I always knew that Michelle was going to show herself to be simply wonderful as both First-Mom, First Lady…friend and confident to the man that sits in the top seat and wears the heavy crown…or in this country…heavy hat…President Barack Obama.

I really like reading all this good press about them.  He was media darling prior to entering the race…media darling after entering the race…and still media darling after having won the race.

I like people who are consistent…don’t you?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/arianna-huffington/obamas-first-100-days-the_b_191831.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/27/the-secret-to-michelle-ob_n_191677.html

As you know…I do not watch much television.  But often while sitting around in a hotel room…I find little  else to do.  So, this is how I happened to hear about the ‘Swine Flu.” As far as I can tell…it is very much like most of the other flu’s…causing diarrhea, vomiting, fevers, headaches…etc.   But thus far it has killed 81 people in New Mexico…and a series of people…up to 40 cases have been diagnosed here in other parts of the United States.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8021384.stm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8022437.stm

To protect yourself they say that you should continuously wash your hands…and when out in public keep your hands out of your mouth and eyes.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/04/27/swine.flu/index.html

http://www.floridatoday.com/article/20090427/BREAKINGNEWS/90427003&referrer=FRONTPAGECAROUSEL

http://www.webmd.com/cold-and-flu/news/20090428/swine-flu-and-travel-what-should-you-do

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/med_swine_flu

http://www.trinidadexpress.com/index.pl/article_news?id=161469997

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=3906861&cl=13188442&ch=4226723&src=news

http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Swine-Flu/ss/events/hl/042409swineflu#photoViewer=/090428/ids_photos_wl/r3827649806.jpg

Could not resist this story…CLICK the LINK BELOW to read it and see the video.

It is about a southern preacher who believes that having ‘good sex’…or as this pastor puts it “great sex’…is something which the body of Christ should be preaching about.

I know you do not want to hear my opinion on that…because you probably already know it…if you have read any of these blogs at all with any degree or level of understanding.

But it just goes to prove…just how overboard this whole sexual revolution has become.   And I am not shocked…as it seems to me that there are some in the church…or seemingly of the church…who have great interest in the subject and are doing everything they can to spread that interest.

Though, I have to admit that my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE… certainly touches upon the subject.   It is…I guess important…but not something which should be preached or for that matter…needed to be taught in church…any more than sex education in school.

http://www.floridatoday.com/article/20090427/NEWS01/904250314/1086

Speaking about my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE…between it and counting down the days to when it is ready for sell…launching my website…blogging…and hitting the road to promote my book…and menopause…it is wonder that I am anything but tired.

Now, I think I am going to get some much more needed sleep, thank you.   Being on the road somehow drains me these days.  I love it…but it tires me.   I think it throws my whole internal clock off…as I usually am the one driving through the night…and most of the day.  But I love the road, baby.   Ain\’t nothing like it.

So, if you will excuse me…I am going to rest now.   Good-night.

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends…

\”pass it on…\” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

It is clear that our First Lady and her dashing husband, our President, Barack…and Michelle Obama  have been making a huge success in Europe since arriving there last week.   They are without a doubt the king and queen of the ball at ever affair and event that they gone to thus far.

What beautiful and fine representation America now has in the President of American and his wife.  So much so that even the Queen of England was so taken by our First Lady that she dashed protocol to the wind. 

In the following 2 paragraphs you get a hint of what was being said about the First Family during their time in merry old England.  You can CLICK on the first LINK BELOW to read the full story.

Mrs. Obama clearly made an impression with the 82-year-old monarch — so much that the smiling queen strayed slightly from protocol and briefly wrapped her arm around the first lady in a rare public show of affection.

A Buckingham Palace spokesman who asked not to be identified because of palace policy said he could not remember the last time the queen had displayed such public affection with a first lady or dignitary.

 

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30017148/?gt1=43001

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/30008409#30008409

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/30019399#30019399

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26315908/vp/30038333#30038333

http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1889051_1865161,00.html

http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1888971_1864557,00.html

http://blogs.wsj.com/economics/2009/04/01/obama-wades-into-murky-waters-of-diplomatic-protocol/

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/first100days/2009/04/01/obama-presents-queen-england-personalized-ipod/

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3036789/#30028003

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/30008409#30019115

The crowds always anxious to meet them, the President and his wife were well greeted and welcomed from state to state during their travels in Europe last week.  

It is good to see that America is finally on the road to restoring… rebuilding… and rekindling  relationships with her allies that had been so badly freyed during the Bush Administration. 

http://www.comcast.net/slideshow/news-obamaeurotrip/1/

Well, as we prepare for the Easter holiday…I was awaken early this morning by one of sisters who decided to go into New York to do some Easter shopping.  It made me think of all the Easters that my mother used to shuttle us around from one shop after another making purchases that even the Queen would have to nod her head in approval of. 

My mother dressed us as children…in beautiful spring colors of light green, pinks, and light airy yellows many times laced with white trim…or white trimmed in pink or light yellow.  We looked like spring all fluffed up in our new Easter clothes and shoes…and freshly done hair-do’s.   And we would be all new…from head to toe…everything brand new for Easter.

You rarely see this today…as people have gotten away from spending so much money buying new clothes for Easter…but back then Easter was the big day…and everybody… saints and sinners got dressed for it.

Folks who rarely went to church…or who only went to church one day per year…found themselves there.  There in church…on Easter Sunday.

And the men all had suits.  Some in bright colors…but there would be an array of various ‘fresh from the package’ starchy shirts with new neckties.  Some had hats while their ladies…wives and children sported Easter bonnets.

And my brothers too…all fresh in their brand new Easter suites and shoes.  With their hair freshly cut and bow ties neatly sitting just below their chins. 

Those were the years.  They were great years…and they were years when folks reverenced the Lord.

 Well, it is just about Easter…tomorrow is Palm Sunday.  Hope you have a beautiful day.  I am on my way to the hairdresser.   It is time for me to start readying myself  for my Easter.    

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends…

“pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

Got up very early again this morning…but I was not nearly as productive as I had been on Saturday.  In fact, I got up going to the bathroom and then stopped to read a chapter in my Bible…and then returned to bed.

I spent the past couple of nights sweating out my cold…of course, I can  certainly see a vast difference.  Been drinking plenty of fluids too…and also been making sure I take my iron tablets.  Got to thicken up my blood…which is why I am also enjoying my Cream of Wheat.  I am working on my 2nd box of it now…and still enjoying every minute of it.  And as I do…it makes me think of how my father used to make it for us as children. 

Mondays was our father’s day to care for us.  As he was a barber…Sundays and Mondays were his 2 days off.    I do not know how they worked out their schedules…but my mother and father did have it worked out as we were never left in the care of other people.

Daddy worked days and mommy worked nights.  She worked at a state institution as a nurse supervisor…as I had previously stated in another one of my blogs…my mother had been the first black nurse in the little southern town where I was born.

Everything my parents did centered around us…their children.  When they bought their first house…it was less than a block away from the little grade school that most of us went to…there was a bakery at the corner…a drug store…a small corner grocery store and deli…a bus stop…and we were only three houses in from the corner of a main roadway.  Not to mention as I see by the city records today…they had bought the largest parcel of land of any 2 family house within our block.  They were wise.  And on top of all of that…there is a college right across the street.

So, when I eat Cream of Wheat it takes me back to those days…when daddy used to make it for us on cold mornings just as were going off to school.  Some mornings he would fry us this thing called festival by some Jamaicans…or fried dumplings.  He could really make those things…no matter what you call them.  And we loved them…we filled them up hot out of the pan with plenty of butter and jelly…or some times with lots of syrup and butter…but they were good…always.   But daddy was a great cook…and for that matter…so was our mother.

I am watching the snow fall down…and it is steady.  It had been rain.  It had rained straight through the night…and hard.   Had all that rain been snow we would have been buried up under it right now.  And that rain had been steady right up to the time it just turned to snow not so long ago.  Now it is just a steady flow of un-yielding snow.  I will soon have to go out and start shoveling…cold or no cold.  But I am not going to complain…it is still beautiful.

I remember my friend in New York…the elderly woman, the church mother, who used to go to our church who passed this past August.  You know I had never realized until some time later that she had passed on my mother’s birth date.  And last night as I was thinking of her…my friend…it also dawned on me that when I had gone to the hospital to visit her…that the floor I had to switch from elevator to elevator on…had the same name as our street…the street that my parent’s house in on. 

It is not a common name…and you do not see it everywhere.  I thought that to be divine providence…you know…God’s working in the matter.  I was very blessed to have had her…to have met her…and that she counted me as a friend.  Her guidance to me shall forever be treasured.

In reading the article on religion…it is odd to me that a country founded on the freedom to practice religious beliefs would today be shifting away from having religion at all.  But these days were bound to come.

When you reflect back on the years following 1962 when the push began to remove prayer from public schools…then anything bearing the word “God”…the challenge to remove the 10 Commandments from court houses and so forth…then this really should be of  no surprise.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090309/ap_on_re/rel_religious_america

http://atheism.about.com/od/churchstatemyths/a/ohairprayer.htm

I don’t know…perhaps it is just me.  But where were all those anti-gay marriage people…and anti-abortion people when all of this was going on?

Droves of anti-gay marriage people come out picketing and marching…and demonstrating…against something which does not affect them…and will never affect them.   But when something like taking prayer out the public school system…removal of the 10 Commandments from the court houses and other federal buildings…removing the words “In God we trust” off  of our U.S. currency…comes up…where are these people?

Prayer was taken out of our school and replaced by sex education…and condoms.  The kids today in school learn less about their A-B-C’s, Math, Sciences etc…than they are about condoms and the ‘birds and the bees.’ 

Kids do not need to learn anything about sex.  Nature through all her infinite wisdom and years of expertise in that department has not needed any help…from the day that Adam and Eve ate that fruit from that tree.  There does not seem to be one time in history that men and women did not know how to get together to procreate.  And now it seems…little kids too.  And I won’t blame it all on sex-education…because that would be foolish and quite absurb of me.  But I do not see where educating kids about sex…does one thing to prepare them for their future in life.

But if they wanted to really to teach them something in regard to youth parenting…then maybe like those ‘Scared Straight’ programs they used to have years ago…perhaps they should take them to a welfare office where they get to meet and talk to some teenage mothers and see for themselves the pitfalls of pregnancy at young ages.   There is nothing like a little one-on-one in reality in order to get the whole picture. 

Or maybe…have them go do work study hours in places like a welfare office or WIC office aiding in in-take service…and they would truly learn a lot that just might give them a reason to pause and to think twice about the consequences of childhood pregnancy.

As I sit here watching the snow…I have been thinking about this guy…this man.  I had met him at an event that I gave a few years ago.  So, whenever he sees me…he likes to greet me. 

Which is fine…I have no problem with that.  It is something I became accustom to through my years in radio.  Everybody wants to grab you…hug you…kiss you on the cheek.  Okay…so, allow it.  It is part of the territory…it goes with the turf when you become popular.

But this guy one day while I was in the library computer lab at school saw me…and he came greeting me…kissing me on the top of my head.  Okay…fine.  I did not say anything about it…but it was on my mind.

But the other day while I was waiting in a bank line…he happened to be passing by and saw me.  My back was to the bank door…and he came up behind me.  He said something to me grinning…and then kissed me to the back of my neck.  I thought nothing of it at first…but later as I got into my son’s truck…in which sat a friend of his whom I was giving a ride to…that is when it hit me. 

That guy had kissed me to the back of  my neck.

I am very picky.  Peculiar…you might even say.  I really do not like people getting too familiar with me…and particularly people who I do not really know.  And besides…he was not even good-looking.  And even if he was…he still out of order…and  I am still picky.

After all, this guy started out by sort of hugging me.  Then he moved on to greeting me with a light kiss to a cheek…then to the top of my head.  And I really should have stopped him then.  So, I put it in my mind that the next time I saw that guy I would have to tell him that he could not touch me again. 

That time came shortly…while I was once again in the library computer lab.  As he approached me…he bent with his arms open ready to embrace me…and I guess kiss me again.  But I happened to catch him…right on time…and drew away from him.

I stopped him saying-

“Listen, shake my hand if you want to greet me.  But do not kiss me.”

He looked at me oddly.

So, I began to remind him about that day in the bank when he had come in and kissed me on my neck.  I told him that anyone seeing that would have thought that we had a relationship and were involved with each other.  Then I asked him what he would have thought if he had been standing off somewhere in the distance and happened to see a man kiss me on my neck.

And you know what he said?

“I would have thought that you were involved with each other too.”

Case close.

I said-

“Look, I am a woman of God.  I cannot just have people walking up to me and kissing me all over the place like that.  Plus that is disrespectful of me for you to do that.  You should have more respect of me to even do anything like that.”

Wow, I have truly grown.  I am a woman.

Gone are the days when I was a child…and people could do anything to me…or with me.

I have control over me.

And I am not having it.

You will respect me.

Wow…  I am woman.

That guy apologized to me…and thanked me for correcting him.  I appreciated him accepting my correction.  Yet…I felt within myself that it should not have been warranted that I should have had to do such a thing.  But men have a way…of taking things for granted…and particularly women.

I felt that many times while working in radio.  I hated when my bosses called me ’sweetheart,’ and ‘dear.’   It was very demeaning to me…while they never greeted each other in such a way…or spoke to each other in such familiar terms.  Consciously , sub-consciously or unconsciously…such things historically have been designed to keep women in their place.

When I was a child…I was powerless.  When I worked in radio…I had limited power.  Today I am my own boss…I wheel power as I may…but yet…I measure it.  As I know I can be highly intimidating to some.

But this may come as a surprise to some of you.  But I have never been kissed.  Not by the male species. 

I know I have a son…but that does not mean that I allowed that man to kiss me.  And I know that I said in my other blog…that Willis Kattrell…well, he kissed me.  And he did.  But I think my head was in motion when he did it…so he only caught  a portion of my lips.  To the side really…of my mouth.

So, I have never been kissed.  Not really…though yes many women have kissed me…and I them.  But the male species…no. 

I never had a boyfriend…and have never dated men.

I am different…   Not like most people.   And my experiences have been different.

Yet, I am a mother.  And I have a fantastically wonderful son.  I treasure and love him very much.  He too is…different.

This is how I know of generational curses.  It was in my mother’s family.  And I do realize…that generational curses can be broken.  I bear witness to it.

I love the change in my life and look forward to my tomorrow.  Perhaps…my husband.  I now wish I had had other children.  My son often had spoken of it…and still does.

There is this funny thing about me.  After having been sexually abused at a very early age…perhaps before or by the age of 10…only twice and by 2 different  men…but sometime thereafter, I decided that I wanted to save myself for my husband.  I thought I wanted to live in a big house with a white picket fence…with a 2 car gargage…and have all the children that I could have.  So, that is what I did…I decided to save myself…and that is what I did. 

From the point of whatever age it was…10 maybe less…the last time someone had taken sexual advantage of me…I never became engaged again sexually until some time when I was 25 years of age.  At this point…I was only interested in woman.  And not just any woman.  Gay women…women like me.  Women who were upper-wardly mobile and doing something with their lives…professional women mostly in media…though some were doctors, accountants etc…but talented…beautiful…well educated women…who looked and acted womanly. 

Not all women who are gay…look it.  In fact…many do not.  The same is true of men…though the reverse thinking about gays is the myth.

I have no idea as to why I have begun to disclose so much to you…about myself.  I shall have to pounder it.

Ahhh…yes…  The point. 

So, I decided to save myself.  Well, at that point I could no longer save certain things as they had been stripped from me.  My innocence had been stolen from me.  But somehow throughout all the years one thing has remained…my kisses.  So, since I have never kissed the male species…or allowed anyone of that species to kiss me directly on the lips…I decided to save it. 

I am saving it for my husband…it is the least that I can give him.  Unpolluted…un-tampered with…safe within my power…to give…or not to give. So, I am saving it for him.  So, no I am not going to let somebody just walk up to me…or sneak up from behind me…and think that he can just come and steal it away from me…not that too.  Except for…of course…er, uhm…if his name is Willis Kattrell.  (you have just got to read that blog)

And let me just say…that I am still scrubbing my neck today…everytime I step into the shower…I am trying to remove the memory of that man’s lips to the back of my neck.

Well, the snow is slowing up now.   And the kids are on their way home from school.  I better get out and start shoveling.  Enjoy the rest of your day.

http://www.stylelist.com/celebrity-style/style-evolution/michelle-obama

http://www.blackvoices.com/life-style/black-style-beauty/michelle-obama-fashion-photos

Didn’t like the VOGUE cover of  Michelle Obama at all…just goes to prove that nobody can do us better than us.   Thank God for Essence, Ebony, Jet, VIB, Right-On, Black Enterprise…and everything
else we have today.

God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on “  www.bsmith101.wordpress.com   ©2009

It is definitely clear that something needs to be done with the present health care system that we have here in America.  I don’t know maybe it is just me…but the system we used to have the one long ago sure seemed alot better than anything they have now.

A long time ago you used to go to the doctor…mostly general practitioners then.  Many of them did not even work out of a hospital or within some kind of medical facility.

No, they worked out of their house which they converted the downstairs into an office space, examining rooms and even had a waiting room…and they usually lived a few blocks away somewhere in the neighborhood.

But one thing about them though…you only had to tell them a symptom or 2…and those doctors…who were known back then as general practitioners…they knew right away what was wrong with you.

Now, today they have specialist after specialist…and  nobody knows anything.  Nobody can tell you anything.  They all say-

“I don’t know.  But lets run some tests.”

Now, how come the little old private practitioner could tell you exactly what was wrong…and all these big time fancy surgeons and specialist can’t tell you a thing?

What don’t they teach anything in medical school anymore?

Besides…how to make money?

There they sit in their big plush medical facilities…or hospitals…or whatever in white crispy starched shirts with their smocks on looking all official…but they don’t know nothing.  Except how to keep you running back and forth while milking you out of every dime your medical plan will pay them.

The other thing about things as they are today in the medical field that gets me…is REFERRALS.

Hate ‘em.

I can’t stand the way the present system is set up.  You can’t go anywhere or see anybody unless some doctor gives you a referral.  And then you can only go where they will allow you.  Or you have to beg and beg  just to be referred with the hopes that somebody else can tell you what is wrong with you.

So, yes…this system is in dire need of correction.

I had been experiencing excruciating pain in my right arm a while back…and I truly mean excruciating.  I had no idea what it was but it was constant severe pain 24/7…and it grew measure by measure.  Finally, I realized that the pain was not going and I could no longer bear it…so, I got out and went to see a doctor.

The doctor asked if I had shoveled any snow.  And I told him no.

Then he asked me had had I lifted anything heavy.  And I told him no.

Then he asked me-

“Well, have you done anything which could have caused the pain?”

Well, if I knew that I wouldn’t have gone to see him.

Finally, he said well go home and if it persists come back and see me.

And I did…a whole week later…where he again sent me on my merry little way after asking a few questions.

Have you ever watched the second hand on a clock ticking the time down?

That’s how my money was going.  Tick…tick…tick…visit after visit and my arm pain by now had grown way beyond unbearable.

It was like the 4th visit and still the doctor had not done one thing to help me or my pain…but take my money…or my plan’s money…which is my money.  As he was about to send me once again on my merry little way…I had a fit in that office.  And I mean…I HAD A FIT.   I started yelling and demanding.  The pain was too much for me to bear and my temperament was far beyond allowing me to continue in the state that I was in.

Now, I am a person who hates it when people tell me that I am yelling when I am not yelling.   Sometimes I may raise my voice a bit…but I may be a long way from  yelling.   I often have to caution people when they tell me that by saying-

“Oh, I haven’t started yelling yet.  But when I do you will certainly know the difference.”

But I started yelling in that doctor’s office…and mean I yelled.

I demanded a referral right then and there…to see a special…and told him that no I was not coming back again so he could continue to take my money while that pain was killing me…and for him to keep telling me the same thing.  I told him to give me that referral…and  give it to me now.

That doctor could not give me a referral quick enough.  And if he hadn’t…    Well, I was in so much pain I was prepared to start turning things over and throwing a few things in that office (I will have to tell at some other time about this restaurant where I did just that…and it was warranted).

I was in dire pain…and I do mean dire.  And I had had enough of this doctor and all of that going back and forth for him to have not done anything to help me.

The next week I was in to see an orthopedic.  Come to find out I had a torn rotary  cuff.   And I had to have surgery done to my shoulder…and that was scheduled a couple of weeks later.   But it took my getting upset in order to get it done.  And this is what people go through day after day upon visiting doctors today…continual trips to the doctor’s office without relief.

The real problem with the medical system is the ‘referral plan.’   It plays against the plan holders.  Doctors somehow seem to believe that they have the upper hand.  They do want they want and when they feel like it…because we have no control over the plans…and we need a piece of paper from a doctor to seek out any form of treatment from anyone else.

The plans control us…and doctors buy into the various plans knowing that they have a free and clear playing field…a cash cow as soon as you hand them your medical card.   Before when the doctor didn’t do what you thought was best…or if you thought that you weren’t getting proper care or service…you just got up and found yourself  another doctor.   But not so any more…those medical plans cut all of that out.

Also, before if you heard from a friend or someone…that this doctor over there was better…you just got up and switched…no referral…no nothing.  But you can’t do that any more either.  These plans have you locked into certain doctors…certain medications etc…etc…

So, there is little wonder why you can’t find a good doctor anymore these days.  Because they do not have to be…because you are not going nowhere no matter how they treat you…or not.  Because they won’t let you.  And this is what is really wrong what today’s system here in America.

Now, none of them need to be any good any more…because we do not have the right or the freedom to go see any other doctor who is better…all because of some stupid medical plan that has us all roped in to them which guarantees these doctors business no matter how bad they are.

So, yeah…Obama-

“Re-vamp the medical system.”

In my opinion the entire system needs a major overhaul.  And it is just too bad that nobody has thought of returning back to the system we used to have years ago where we were not treated like mindless little children.  Where we have freedom of will and could seek out the best care for ourselves.  Believe me…they would get their acts back together then…or starve.

I truly believe what somebody said a long time ago-

“If  it is not broken…don’t fix it.”

That is the principle which should have been applied years ago…then maybe now we would not be in the predicament that we are in today with all these large medical plans and pharmaceutical companies dictating things to us.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/03/06/us/politics/06web-health.html?_r=1&hp

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=3906861&cl=12341496&ch=4226713&src=news

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=3906861&d=12336205&ch=422676720&src=news

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090305/ap_on_go_pr_wh/health_care_overhaul

I was just thinking about the NFL football players, Corey Smith, Marquis Cooper and other man, who were lost at sea this past week.  For some reason my mind keeps telling me that the search team should have looked east of where they were searching.

I feel for them…and their families…and I have yet to give up hope for them.

The families were disenchanted when the coast guard called off their search of the missing parties the other day.  I could not help but think…that rather than waiting on the shorelines their families should have been out on those waters looking too.

It was not like those football players didn’t have money.  Sometimes you have got to mobilize your own efforts rather than leaving everything up to everyone else.  When you love and care for someone…who can be more determine or seek them out or more fervent in finding them than you?

Their boat flipped over casting the 4 boat members into the sea.  Last week one lone party of the boat was found siting a top of the flipped over boat.  It all happened in the Tampa Bay area…in the city of Clearwater which is an island sitting with one part of it in the Atlantic Ocean…and the other side in the Gulf of Mexico.  So, you can imagine the amount of territory that would they had to cover in their attempts in trying to find the 4 men.

http://nbcsports.msnbc.com/id/29454121/

http://news.aol.com/article/missing-nfl-players/363480

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/sports/football/sfl-flspboaters03sbmar03,0,6839198.story

Well, it seems that the families and friends must have read my mind…but they should have gotten out there searching from the very beginning.  But you can read more on that by CLICK the LINK below.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090304/ap_on_re_us/missing_boaters_nfl

There is this woman in the Church of God in Christ, by the name of Betty Nelson, who tells this story of her daughter.  She tells how her daughter had taken to a wayward turn in her young life.  She started hanging out and got caught up in drugs and things.

Her mother tried dealing with the situation as much and best as she could…but her daughter grew worst.  Harder to control and was totally out of order because the drugs and the wayward life had taken her over.  Eventually Betty Nelson said that her daughter ceased coming home.  And over this her mother shed many tears…and many long nights and days praying to God that her daughter would come out of the life she had fallen into.

Finally, Betty Nelson says that she decided that she was not going to let her daughter be lost to the streets.   She says she called out saying-

“Devil, you can’t have my daughter.  I don’t care what I have to do.  But I’m going to find my daughter.  And I’m taking her back…out of the drugs…out of the prostitution…out of…”

She says she hit the streets searching for daughter.  Searching and searching until she came to some crack house.  She says the place was run down…with people’s children laying everywhere all strung out on drugs…but she did not let fear overtake her.  She walked into that old broken down crack house and began searching through it looking for her daughter.  And in the midst of that house she found her daughter…all drugged out…and out of her head.  But she says she took her daughter out of there.  And she says that she dared anybody to try to stop her.

It is funny about a mother…with a made up mind.  She cannot be swayed when it comes to her child.

Today, Betty Nelson’s daughter is free from her addiction and is a living testimony of a mother’s love for her child…and how sometimes we as parents have to be willing to do the unthinkable…and the seemingly impossible in order to save our children from themselves.

I am a believer of  ‘tough love.’ But sometimes being too tough can prove to be worst…and have more dire consequences.   There must be a balance.  Be tough if it is required…but never unloving…or uncaring.

Gandhi Items Sold for $1.8 Million

It was an auction of  items once owned by Mohandas K. Gandhi, including a pocket watch and spectacles, which has touched off outrage in India as its government continues to talk with the items’ owner.

It seems that when you are dead everybody wants a piece of  you.

Had those items meant so much to the government of India it would seem to me that it would have tried to acquire them before the auction.

http://cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/03/05/india-rejects-owners-proposal-on-gandhi-items/?hp

Well, the Obama’s are working hard to ensure that their daughters do not miss one moment of enjoying their childhood…and rightly so.  The girls, Malia and Sasha were pleasantly surprised last week by a new addition in their new back yard.   And it looks like so much fun.  http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/local/politics/ny-usswing0306,0,7640326.story

Well, the dignitaries are starting to come ‘a visiting.’  On yesterday, Gordon Brown the Prime Ministry of England came a courting.  It would be interesting to know exactly what they discussed.

The one good thing about Obama…and there are many good things about him.  But this I like best of all.  He is not a chump.  He walks, talks and carries himself like a man…and he is not afraid of speak up.  And another thing…that I like about him.  He is not a game player.   Not a person who relies upon lies and deceit to get over on us…the voters of America.

I guess that is what we all saw in him…and that is why he is now President of the United States.

I am so glad for a breath of fresh air…that breath of fresh air called Barack Obama.  I was beginning to suffocate.

Well, at last it stopped snowing and now we have mounds of it all over the place again.  But…yes…I LOVE IT.

Last night I made up my mind that I do not care how hot it gets this summer…I am not going to complain.  I will merely pull the fan a little closer…and remember this winter…all the snow…the cold…and furnace being blown.

So, yes…I love looking at the beauty of winter…but I will sure be happy when summer comes.  And weather like today’s…makes me long for it all the more.

Well, God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

CLICK the ABOVE video a COUPLE of TIMES and just ignore the text.

Sometimes I just become so overjoyed that I can’t keep it to myself.  And this is one of those times.  I am suppose to be working on launching my website…which should be up this week.  But I just couldn’t not before writing this blog…to tell you just how good God is to me.

I know that many many many people are currently facing foreclosure and until I started taking care of my parent’s property it really never mattered much to me.  But following the passing of my father the 2 mortgage companies which had mortgages against our property put us into foreclosure.  But not being on the mortgages the companies refused to tell me anything…and I was the only out of my 7 other siblings who felt our parent’s property was worth fighting for and eventually paying off. 

But because my name is not on the loans for the mortgage (which of course it would not be…since the house belonged to my parents and it was their loan).  So, the mortgage companies legally did not have to give me any information regarding my parent’s account…and for the most part that is what they did.  They refused to share any information on their account with me…even though they knew that my parents were now both deceased.  And the kind of information I wanted was a copy of the payment history of the entire loan and all other information concerning it…the whole history of mortgages.

Finally, CitiMortgage, one of the mortgage companies…the one with the highest balance and most difficult company to deal with…they sent me a copy of my parent’s mortgage.   After going over the documents it showed that supposedly that mortgage had been refinanced in 1999.  But my father by that time had been diagnosed as having Alzheimer’s.  Besides his left hand shook badly…which meant that his signature would have been severely affected when he wrote.  But that copy of the supposed mortgage refinanced by him showed no signs of a wobbly hand.  And even if it had my father’s mental capacity being what it supposedly was at the time…he was not legally competent to enter into any such contractual agreement.

So, I filed papers disputing the foreclosure by CitiMortgage against my parent’s property based upon it being a false document…and as being such CitiMortgage’s foreclosure was being based upon a fraudulent document which would nullify that contract and halt their foreclosure based on the amount outstanding due to that document.

Well, after I don’t know how many months…and after receiving information from CitiFinancial that they were in possession of my parent’s property.  I went back to court.  Because CitiMortgage/CitiFinancial had failed to answer my complaint against them.  So, I entered a default against them.  Today, I received my notification that my default had been granted.

I cannot tell you how overjoyed I am.  Through the grace and mercy of God…I had won.  This decision totally knocks out a mortgage which added over  a hundred thousand additional dollars onto my parent’s prior loan. 

I knew in my heart that my father would have never placed an additional $100,000 of debt upon our property.  That money was supposedly against a loan of nearly $30,000 at an interest rate of over $60,000 making CitiMortgage a mighty big winner in that contract.   My father would have never done…and particularly since he had already had more money than the alleged near $30,000 the loan approved for…as he had more than that already in at least one of his several bank accounts.  So, I went into court Pro-se as a heir to the estate of my father…and went to fight.  But God fought that battle for me.  And I cannot thank Him enough.

I wrote this blog because I know that many people are going through much of the same.  It is very difficult trying to go to bed night after night…and not know whether or not tomorrow you will be deposed and kicked out into the streets…because some bank or mortgage company took over your home.

One of the biggest frauds going…happens when people in mortgage companies find out that there is a dispute among family members following the death of someone of whom they hold a loan against their property.  This opens the door for all kinds of things to happen if the people or a person within the mortgage company is a distrustful crook…that might shock some.   But it is very true…and not just with mortgage companies but lawyers also…anyone sitting in a position they see where they can take advantage of. 

Anybody sitting in a position who can take advantage of  such a situation many times does.  Because they seize upon the family members lack of communication with one another and their inner turmoils and conflicts to keep the family members too busy at each other’s throat…and it allows the cheats the freedom to do whatever they will.   It is for this reason that I asked to see the complete history of my parent’s mortgage from the initial mortgage on.  For which I never got because they refused to release to me.  Nor did any notices of court dates come to house regarding the foreclosure hearings. 

By not getting those notices…the notices regarding the foreclosure hearings…I could not appear in court to defend my parent’s property.  And since none of my other siblings cared…they didn’t go either.  This meant that that by default the mortgage company won their foreclosure because nobody showed up on our side of the table…or who represented us in court.

I tell people all the time…the worst thing you can do in a court case…is not show up.  By failing to show up the other side automatically wins.  Give yourself a fighting chance.  Show up and tell the judge your side of the story…you may be pleasantly surprised by the outcome.  It could make a difference.

If you have been reading these blogs then you also know that I had entered a case in the Appellate Court. 

Perhaps you are familiar with this…and are guilty of the same.  Though I must say as a rule I am not a procrastinator…but for a couple of weeks I had been walking around with the letter from the Appellate Court unopened.  I get tons of mail…and there are some pieces that I put off opening simply because I don’t want to think about it…and I am afraid of what it might be informing me of.  This was the case regarding my default notification from the court and this letter from the Appellate Court…both of which I finally decided I couldn’t put it off any longer.   So, I opened them up this morning.

It turned out I had been dreading good news from both courts.  The notice I got from the Appellate Court was to inform me that I would not have argue orally our case before the judges.  Though I had requested to do so…I really didn’t want to do it.  But from where I stand nobody can better present my case than me…and particularly since when my son had gotten a lawyer…the lawyer told him to settle for $1,800.   Our car had been totaled, my son suffered back injury (which still plagues him today)…and on top of that the repairs that the insurer of the other vehicle (the one that caused the accident) authorized were not sufficient considering the amount damage sustained to our vehicle. 

So, I filed the papers myself…when you do this it is called “Pro-Se.”  But it was not because of any of the reasons I have already listed that drove me to file suit.  No, I filed because they had returned to my son a faulty automobile which could have killed him…and they didn’t care.  The car shook…the bumper would fall off while he was driving…and at the time of the accident my son was away at college in a town which had no public transportation…not even cab service…which is why I had to buy him a car in the first place.

So, I filed suit in conjunction with my son against Allstate Insurance.  And today I heard from the Appellate Court…because if you recall, also in a prior blog, I explained how my son had really won the case…but how the whole thing had been a set-up and ended up in front of a judge who was friendly with the other side.  Don’t act shock to hear this…it happens everyday…watch LAW & ORDER.  It is regular practice for lawyers to call the clerk’s office to find out which judge is in what court and when. And try to schedule their hearing before judges who are very lenient or favorable to them.

Had we lost our case in court fairly…I would have accepted that decision.  But I could not knowing that we had not been unjustly treated and all our evidence and testimonies had been overlooked.  So, I filed a Notice of Appeal…and to the Appeals Court we were a going. 

One of the most involved documents I have ever had to put together was the legal brief that was required of the Appeals Courts.  It was over 100 pages in length and required many hours of research in a local law library and several days of typing…but I did it.  By the time our case finally got heard…following all the hearings for the various pre-hearing court dates for…Motions to be entered…and Mediation…etc..and all our travelling back and forth…many times when we barely had the money to go and come back.  But we did it any ways by faith…over 900 miles each time.

Now, the notice from the Appeals Court today informed me that we would not have to present our case orally before the Appellate Court.  I had covered everything so completely in that brief…and in great detail…including the court transcript to back up my statements.  I am so happy that we do not have to go down and stand before them.  Standing before several judges dressed in black robes…would have been a bit un-nerving for me.  But if I had to…I would have done it.  I had prepared myself to do it.  Because from the on-set…I had not filed the papers to lose our court case.  And I always knew it was just a matter of how much…because we had all the documentations, receipts, invoices, pictures etc. to prove our case.  Many times in court just having truth on yourself is not enough…you must have hard evidence…and we had both truth and hard evidence.  Then they next thing is to be capable of delivering that evidence before in a logical and as near legal manner as you can master.

I tell you this…because I do believe that if more people sued for wrongs and injustices…maybe some of us others would not have to.  We live in an area where they want to make you feel guilty for having to sue.  But believe me…many times a law suit is necessary to resolve many matters.  The problem is most lawyers won’t take any cases that they believe they won’t make any money on…or that may tie them up for too long.  This leaves those who can’t go into court for themselves with no choice but to drop the matter.  And even I have had to decide whether or not something was a battle to fight or not. 

I have not sued everybody…though my son and most of friends believe I have.  But I have not.  Some of them I have left for God to deal with.  He can do things to them that I cannot.

This reminds me of a time when I was in grade school.  While in the cafeteria one day just as I was about to sit down…this girl took her foot and snatched the stool from up under me.  I fell flat…and everybody laughed at me. 

I was so mad that I began praying to God to do something to the girl.  And a couple of years later I realized he had.  The girl is very unattractive…and I have always thought God did that to her because of me.  Truly, I have.  From that point on I have never prayed to God to take care of anybody else for me.  I thought His punishment to her was a bit too harsh. 

So, for the cases I decided not to pursue…I have just left it up to His discretion if He wants to do something about it or not.  The Bible says…He rights every wrong.

But I will keep you posted on the Appellate Court decision. 

The reason behind this blog is to encourage those of you who are facing foreclosure…or any other problem…legal or otherwise.  Do not give up.  Go back through your paperwork…there may be something in it which can turn your situation around.  You may find a loop hole…lawyers use them all the time.  But if they can so can you.

Always remember that God has the final word in all situations.  And that He is faithful.

My parent’s property is still in foreclosure but now all the  money paid on the property from the date of that refinance date that I disputed to present will have to be reverted to the old mortgage…and with interest. 

The Bible is true…God is always working it out for our good.  I am just so happy.

God is good.  And I am so happy that he is a friend of mind.

It is still Black History Month…Ida B. Wells…W.B. DeBois…Billie Holiday……Marion Anderson...Sweet Honey in the Rock…

http://mirroronamerica.blogspot.com/2009_02_01_archive.html

As I have said in my other Black History Month posts…the reason I have not given you any information on the people that I list is so that you will be motivated to research who they are.  This will prove to far more helpful to you…and to your ability to remember their accomplishments.

Well, God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

Out for 9 months and the game just has not been the same.  First who has been showing to watch the tournaments since Tiger Woods has been out due to knee surgery?  And during his recovery his wife gave birth to a new baby too. 

Now, the proud father of 2, a daughter and son…Tiger hit the green this past Wednesday in his big return to  the PGA at the WGC-Accenture Match Play Championship. 

I did watch as he played his last tournament prior to the surgery…and how even through the pain of the injury Tiger pulled it off.  He just refused to give up…or in.  That is the same way most athletes approach their sports.

In fact, I happened to come across this clip of Serena Williams who had gone out to play while fighting with a stomach virus.  Watch this youtube clip below…and you will understand the amount of commitment professional athletes have for their game.

All I can say is that we have all been hit with it one time or another.  

But if I had…had a stomach virus…they wouldn’t have seen me.  It is hard to get away from the toilet with a stomach virus.  But I guess you have to…when you know that thousands of people have come out to see you win…or get beat…or just because they love the sport.

Before Tiger hit the pro golf circuit…I have to admit that I never watched golf at all…that was near the beginning period when I started to watch less and less television.   One of the reasons for which I have kind of kicked television to the curve is because of something my father would always say to me.

He would say-

“They have theirs and you’ve got to get yours.”

I used to hate hearing that.  I would hear it after my mother would go to school for Open House and come back telling my father all the things the teacher had to say about me. You know…how I wasn’t doing this or I wasn’t doing that…or how I needed to improve in this or that…and how much Imay not have been paying attention while in class.  Which often led to my getting a whipping. 

When I would try to explain to daddy that the teacher had said all of those things because she really didn’t like me.  But before I could open my mouth and get half of that out…daddy would usually cut me off saying-

“The teacher got hers.”

And he would say that sternly…and then he would start whipping.

And I am definitely all for parents whipping their kids.  I whipped mine.  But it is because of whipping…that I refused to do many things that others I knew didn’t hesitate to do.  I will never forget when I decided to try my hand at smoking.

In Junior High School the girls during lunch period would gang into the girl’s bathroom down by the cafeteria smoking after lunch. One day, I had bought a pack of cigarettes and after eating lunch headed for the ladie’s room.  Just as we were just getting started passing around the cigarettes and lighting up in came the vice principle of the school.  We all went running scattering like a bunch of I don’t know what out through another door.  I dashed back into the cafeteria took a seat at a table and started pretending as though I had been their the whole time.

The vice principle had caught one of the girls…and as he marched her through the cafeteria she pointed at me and said-

“She was there too.”

And I guess she pointed out a few others.  And we all ended up in the principle’s office.

One by one the principle, Mr. Romano, called us into his office and began calling our parents.  He left his door open so I could clearly see him and hear him on the phone.  As I took a seat outside of the his office awaiting my turn to be called inside…I started crying.  I was just a boo-whooing…and I do mean boo-whooing the whole time.  I was crying and sobbing my poor little self to death…because I knew that my parents were going to kill me.  I was the last one that the principle called into his office…and to my surprise he counseled me and warned me…and then sent me back to class.  He had not called my parents.  And from that day to this I have never touched another cigarette either.  And have never been tempted to do so again.

So, yeah…I believe in whipping the child.  Not in anger but out of love.  I hated whipping my son…some times I even would go to him and just wrap my arms around him after.  But I loved him…and prefered that I taught him rather than a bunch of police who would have no compassion for him…if they found themselves whipping him later.  It is something I have never had to worry about…outside of the fact of him a young black male in America.   Because he has never had a brush with the law…though I had had my share of going back and forth to school about him…like my parents did for me.  And I have had to sit in the back of some of his classes…but by the time he got to the 10th grade he told me-

“Ma, I’m too old for you to still be sitting in the back of my classes.”

And he was right.  Sometimes, parents just hate to let go.  But the kids have to grow up.  They have to be allowed to become their own people…but that doesn’t mean we stop parenting them.  They will always be the children…and we will always be the parent.

Their can be no denying the privotal roles that both Earl Woods and Richard Williams…as well as, Joe Jackson (father of the Jacksons)…played in the lives of their children.  Without whom their children lives may have been very very different…and they certainly may not have become the people we now recognize them to be. 

Investing time in your children can really pay off…and as you see by the examples of Joe Jackson, Earl Jones and Richard Williams.  Many times it can also put your children on their path.

Going back to why I really do not watch much television…well, besides my schedule and really not having ever been a big television person except for when I was child.  Then I stayed up under the TV…but not now…and not for years.  Besides there’s not really much on TV but a bunch of junk.  How many different shows can you watch of someone trying to win a million dollars?  After a while you have to get bored.  And I have to say that it is because of my father and what he would always say to me-

“They got theirs already. You’ve got to get yours.”

Meaning the teacher had a job already and was making a living…and that I had to work to get mine.  This meant I had to learn something…pay  attention in school…get my school work done etc.  And that I didn’t have the leisure of wasting any time in order to work towards learning what I needed to learn in order to make something out of myself. 

Daddy would say the same thing about television just as he was about to cut it off and tell us to go study.  

“They got theirs.” 

Meaning I wasn’t learning nothing sitting in front of the TV…and those people had already learned what they needed to know…because they were now making their living.

And so…I hear those words still today as I sit and work…whether it be on class work, or writing screenplays or even this blog.  Or even while working on my books.  I am always working towards my goals.

Talking about my books…I hope you have not forgotten about “THE BISHOP’S WIFE.”  The date is nearing for when you can get your copy.  And I am sure you will enjoy it…it is probably not anything else you have ever read because it is a bit radical.  But you will love the storyline…it will keep you reading I am sure. 

So much for my station break…now, back to what I began writing this blog about.

Already the top grossing athlete of all times, Tiger Woods by  September of 2007 had already earned over $86 million on the golf course.  He is widely recognized as the first athlete who will exceed the billion dollar mark before his career is over.  And that $86 million…mind you was only in tournament money…not inclusive of all those little added perks called endorsements and things like that which he also has.  I known you have seen Tiger in all those television commercials…e.g.  American Express…Nike…and what is that?  Buick…or whatever it is…you know those automobile commercials.  So, yes…Tiger is raking it in. 

But since Tiger’s absence off the golf circuit for the past 9 months the golf world has been hurting.  Their number one drawer had been sidelined…and the tickets and interest in the golf plummeted.  I must admit that I myself never watched the game one day in my life until a little young man decided to end his college days and step out into the pro-golf world.  Thus was the beginning of my interest in the sport of golf.  Though I will also admit that prior to Tiger Woods ever hitting my television screen…I always wondered why they bothered to show golf on TV.  When they took those long shots following the ball into the air…I never saw one thing.  But that was before Tiger…I can see those balls clearly now, baby.

 http://www.sportsbusinessradio.com/node/1312

http://sports.espn.go.com/golf/columns/story?columnist=harig_bob&id=3920284&campaign=rss&source=GOLFHeadlines

http://sports.espn.go.com/golf/tigerwoods

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/flash/zoomGallery?section=gen&photoGalleryId=3443525

http://sports.espn.go.com/golf/news/story?id=3914982

http://sports.espn.go.com/stations/player?id=3922207

http://sports.espn.go.com/golf/news/story?id=3921802&campaign=rss&source=ESPNHeadlines

Sent almost my entire day in bed and I am not ashamed to say it.  And I have enjoyed every minute of it.  Though I did get up to wash some clothes and to mop the kitchen and bathroom floors…and oh, cooked me a little something.  But that was it.   And I plan to do the same thing tomorrow minus the washing of clothes and the mopping of the floors, of course.

And oh, yes…it is still Black History Month.  But I included so many photos already in this blog…I will save my Black History stuff for my next blog.  Definitely hope you are learning something…or trying to find out more on the people whom I have already placed into my other blogs this month. 

And one more thing…   Daddy had only a 7th grade education and could barely read yet he owned his own business…put us all through school…Princeton, Moorehouse, University of Alabama, University of Kentucky , Brandesis University etc.  He and my mother both believed strongly in education.  He was a highly successful businessman, as we lived very well, who never paid a bill when it due but always as soon as he got one.  He never tried to cheat anybody or do anything illegal…and he never owned one charge card.  Yet, he owned his business, had 2 houses…and paid for everything that we needed as he was definitely the head of our house…though my mother was the boss (smile).  They made a great team.

My mother was always taking classes.  She had graduated from nursing school and was the first black nurse in the little town down South that I was born in.  Having graduated from nursing school down there at that time in history…and being the only one…I can’t imagine what my mother must have had to go through.  She, however, took great pleasure in studying…she loved it…and these were classes she took many years while we were growing up.  She took typing classes, accounting classes…and I can’t remember what else.  But she even had a lady come to our house who taught us piano…and gave her voice lessons. 

My parents were something else.  I have to admit though that though we (meaning their kids) thought we were rich…we never really knew that we were rich until years later as we looked back over our life with our parents compared to those who lived around us.  We were the riches people on our street.  The riches people in our church…and the riches people most places we went.  We never walked anywhere except to church on Sunday mornings to Sunday school as young children as my parents always had a car…and didn’t drive junk.  Not that they flaunted anything either…that was not their nature.  But they had moved North to ensure a better life for their children.  And that they did…even for their grand children they did it…and they did it marvelously well.

Our riches were far greater than anything financially my parents may or may not have had.  It was something that cannot be purchased for a price…and worth more than rubies.  They gave us love.

Well, God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009

Today I woke up to the most interesting phone call.  It was from a daughter of a friend of mine.  I had been thinking of her since I had not heard from her for a few weeks and we usually try to touch bases with each other at least once a week, if we can.  But that just does not always happen.

So, yesterday evening while waiting on my son, I decided to give her a call and received no answer.  So, it was a pleasant surprise to see her number pop up on my cell phone when she buzzed me back this morning.

The good part was that she had not been sick…well…   She hadn’t had to go to the hospital this week.  Yes, I did say this week. 

Very early on she had begun having to deal with a series of health issues.  Many of which most people would have just given up and gone and crawled into a corner…but she didn’t. 

It has been a fight for her…weekly…and I have no doubt daily.  But she has remained strong through it.  And that is really the best part about speaking with her because through it all she has managed to smile and laugh her way through it…every single episode.  She always continues to see a brighter side.

I could not imagine myself having to deal with heavy health issues which have invaded her body since she reached womanhood.  For one thing she has what Bernie Mack had Sarcoidosis.  I don’t really know what that is…but it can cause sudden death and is considered a mysterious medical disorder.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/lifestyle/health/chi-sarcoidosisaug12,0,5966562.story

But Vee, and I don’t often call names, also lives in Chi-town…that is Chicago for those of you who do not know what that means…just like Bernie Mack had.   She started off our conversation telling me how she has been fighting the severe Chicago cold and the frosty wind blowing in off of Lake Michigan.  And then she began to tell me about her ex-husband and how he was recently put into a hospice.

This was a guy whom when she was a high school teenager every other word that proceeded out of her mouth was his name.  It was his name and his name only.  I thought it interesting after years of having lost contact with her family…and upon finally becoming reconnected with them due to the death of her uncle, Tyrone Davis…whom if you are old enough know him by his hits…such as “Can I Change My Mind” and “In the Mood”…I thought it interesting that she had married him.

It was clearly a bad and most severe case of  ‘puppy love’…and Vee had it bad.  She adored that boy.  And it was interesting that someone whom she had adored so much she did eventually marry.  But through the years it had not worked out and eventually they got divorced only to find out that they liked each other well enough to be friends.  And it is nice when people can do that.  Break up but yet be able to pull and salvage something out those years together…and they did…and it was especially good because they had a child together.

Vee told me that he was now placed in this hospice suffering from having cancerous tumors all through his body.

http://www.aboutcancer.info/

http://www.medicinenet.com/cancer/article.htm

Warning signs are so important…but nothing beats a regular check up.  Even I am guilty of not always wanting to go to the doctors on a regular basis.   As I never get sick…but never getting sick doesn’t mean you don’t need to ensure a healthy you.

At the end of last semester when I was just finishing up with all my classes…after carrying 18 credits for the semester…one morning my right hand began shaking uncontrollably.  Since, I had to do a presentation in a few hours…I just thought I was becoming nervous or something.  

But near the beginning of my second class on that day…my right hand began to freeze up on me.  It would lock up and I could not open it…nor could I do anything with it.  By this time I knew it was something more than just possible nerves bothering me..and I began to think I was near to having a stroke or either a heart attack.  So, I immediately knew I needed to leave class to get to a hospital.

Have you ever had any warning signs?

Did you take heed…and realize that your body was trying to tell you something?

It is true…our bodies are like fine tuned automobiles…and when you start to hear some noise…well…in our case something starts to act up you better go and get it checked out.  I understand being fearful of hearing bad news. 

But what is worst?

Hearing the bad news while something can still be done…or hearing the bad news when it is too late to do anything about it?

I will never forget Mrs. Ripperton, Minnie Ripperton’s mother, who used to be a member of 6th Grace United Presbyterian Church in Chicago…down on Cottage Grove and 35th Street.  She would talk to me sometimes about Minnie and how much pain Minnie had been in before her death.  (Minnie’s daughter currently stars on Saturday Night Live…Maya Rudolph…who obviously has both of her grandparents sense of humor.  That Mr. Ripperton was so so funny…and Mrs. Ripperton called him ‘Rip.’  They were a great couple.  Wonderful family…Elaine and all of them.   I remember them all well.)

One day Mrs. Ripperton held out her arm and said-

“You see this…Minnie could take her arm and beat it against the table and not feel anything.  That’s how hard her arm had become and how filled up  it was with all the pain.”

http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Minnie-Riperton-Biography/AC559ACE33FEC41248256A16001F13AB

I had known nothing about cancer…but that day Mrs. Ripperton told me something about it that has stuck with me through the years.  And I knew from that day that cancer was something I would never want to get.  But illness is hard no matter what it is that people have…and by hard here…I mean difficult to deal with.

So, it was interesting to me that Vee would have called me giving me the information on how she had been staying up talking to her ex-husband over the phone…praying with him and reading the Bible to him.  Though she said he really didn’t want to hear it…but she would read it to him anyway.

Many people say that they don’t want to hear it…that they do not want to have anybody telling them anything about the Bible or any more people coming to in to pray over them.  I have heard it…but when nothing else can help…you’ve got to learn how to call upon the name of the Lord.

A friend of mine in New York became very ill.  I had not seen her for a while.  So, one day I decided to run by her house which was only a couple blocks up and just around the corner from me. 

When her mother answered the door she told me that Jackie wasn’t feeling well…yet, another name that I have mentioned in this blog…but this blog is filled with so many people if I didn’t I call a name or 2…or 3…you would become confused.  When I went up stairs and her mother opened Jackie’s bedroom door to allow me in…I was horrified.  I was looking at death and I knew it. 

Jackie was not even a shell of herself…her lips were a bright red…her complexion was very very dark…all her weight was gone…she was curled up in the fetus position…and when I approached her…I said immediately-

“Let me go get Shirley so she can pray for you.”

Jackie refused speaking in a very low and slow voice saying-

“I have had a enough praying for me.  I don’t want any more prayers.”

But I kept begging…I was afraid for her and the only thing I knew to do was to go get somebody who get a prayer through to God.   I was not saved…but I knew the power of finding someone who truly could get to God’s ear.  Finally, Jackie consented.

I ran down the street and through the door open to Shirley’s real estate office and said-

“Shirley, you’ve got to come.  You’ve got to come and pray for Jackie.  You’ve got to come.”

Shirley got up and rushed out of her office leaving her secretary to handle her clients.  And we both rushed back up the street and around the corner.

Shirley had brought with her…her oil…and as she went into the room she began praying and anointing Jackie’s body with the oil.  I stood rubbing Jackie’s feet trying to pray as much as I could in agreement with Shirley as tears ran down my cheeks.  I cried for my friend…and I prayed for God to spare her life.

Shirley soon left but I continued to rub Jackie’s limbs…and before I left some time later… first I saw a toe move and then she stretch out one of her legs slightly.  Jackie was coming out of that fetal position.  And I could see strength coming back into her body.  Thank God for Shirley and the power of prayer. 

Today, Jackie is doing just fine…and I have no doubt that she will never doubt the power of prayer ever again.    It truly does changes things.

But I understood Vee’s ex-husband being bitter and angry over his illness.  He is young yet and a death sentence has been pronounced over his head.  That has to be harder than hard to deal with.  And then to be placed in a hospice…the ultimate declaration of death upon him.

But even in that state God is able to turn his situation around.

Which brings me to another story…since when I had tried to reach Vee last night and couldn’t…I decided to buzz someone else.  Tanya…and again I rarely called people’s names in these blogs…but sometimes I just can’t help it.  When you come upon outstanding people…it is worth calling out their names.

At first I thought I was awaking her from her sleep as her voice sounded funny…but she told me no.  She had just gotten out of the hospital…and she informed me that she had been there for an entire week.  Her lungs had filled with fluid and she had suffered a bad asthma attack…but while in the hospital she had shared a room with a woman whom she told me had been very ill.

But it is the treatment of the woman by her doctor that Tanya really shared with me.  Tanya said that the doctor had been so coarse with the woman who was…laying on her death bed.   He told her that they had  the papers from her health proxy to not resuscitate.  Tanya said the doctor was not kind or caring at all in his words…and that when he left the woman felt even worst.

But Tanya told me how she encouraged the woman by saying-

“Don’t worry, ma’am.  He doesn’t know.  You might not need to be resuscitated at all.  Can’t no doctor tell you when you are going to die.  You might even out live him.”

Because of the various medical plans that people now have to have in order to be treated…most medical facilities feel they no longer have to treat you with any type of respect, dignity or courtesy.   After all once you give them your card number they already have your money…it is as good as in the bank.   And this is a sad commentary but true. 

The medical field has gone to the dogs and pit-bulls…private companies have gone into the medical business as ‘for profit entities’…much like many prisons have also done.   They care nothing about trying to save people or making them better.  They would  have you come back and forth a hundred times…while pretending they are checking on this or checking on that.  While all the while they are just eating up your medical benefits.  It is sad…quite sad.  

But t is funny how God puts people in the right place at the right time.  Every now and then we all need someone in the right place…at the right time to encourage us when we are going through a rough time in our life.  And oftentimes…these people know and have not just a sense of who God is…but a true  relationship with Him as well.

One morning a couple of years ago, I woke up with a pain to my lower back area.  It was a very severe pain…so much so that whenever I moved I would scream out in pain.  As the day progressed the pain progressed…it got worst.  I could barely stand, walk, turn or lay down without that severe excruciating pain getting the best of me.  I, however, prefer to suffer pain rather than to take any type of medication.  So, I endure things until they pass…if they pass.  Thus far God has blessed me usually…they pass.  But this problem kept on growing worst.  And it inhibited me…I could not make the slightest move without screaming out.  

I had to push myself through this pain and it was very hard.  But I decided to drive into New York and to go to church.   While in the car the pain was bad but I didn’t let it stop me…and the funny thing about it was this.  When I got to the church and walked inside the pain was gone.  As if  it had never been.  It was gone throughout almost  the entire church service and I thought it had left me entirely.  And it had…up until the time the service ended.  And slowly the pain began to resume.

That night I decided to stay over in New York with mother.  Yes, the one I have written about in several of these blogs who recently passed near the latter part of last year.  Mother enjoyed my company.  And I…well, I enjoyed hers as well.  She was a very funny and witty woman…but she also loved the Lord and she possessed much wisdom.   I loved talking with her as she was well versed on everything from politics to the latest news topics of interest…as well as, the Bible.

She would often ask me to stay or come into New York to spend some time with her after I had left the city to return home to take care of some family matters.  But most of the time I would not…I did not want to infringe upon her or our friendship…though I knew that she did not mind.  But occasional I would stay over…and this was one of those times.

By the time we had reached mother’s apartment…my pain was almost totally back and occasionally I would screech out in pain.  But by morning it had gotten far worst…I barely got up off the bed…and when I did I knew I would not be able to lay back down.  So, I could not lay down and nor could I stand.  It was terrible…and I was at mother’s house to make it even worst.

Not wanting to worry mother over my condition, I decided I better go to the hospital.  Mother and I had lived around the corner from each other…and the hospital was right across the street from her apartment.  So, I made my way out the door…into the elevator…across the street and into the hospital where I told them upon stepping up to the reception window-

“I can’t stand and I can’t sit…I think you need to lay me down somewhere.”

And they immediately admitted me into emergency and they sent a person around to me to take all my information once I finally was able to get into a laying position.

A fairly good-looking doctor came and began servicing me…and eventually he told me my problem.  I had a slipped disc.  When I asked him about how I could get it fix…he told me I couldn’t.  He said that the disc has to slip back into place on its own.  I was in such pain…that I was willing to go up under the knife to never have to find myself back in this state again.  And that was rare…because I usually say no to such things…to operations if I felt I could live without them.  But every time I moved I was screaming out in pain that is how severe the pain was.  And I could do nothing.   So, yes…there are times when even I start to sing a different tune…and this was one of them.

The doctor had an ‘i-v’ hooked up to me and they began to feed me muscle relaxers and pain killers to cause the pain to subside.  And while laying there down there in a stall in the emergency room one of our church’s prayer warriors came in.  It was Sister Capers…this blog is filled with names today.   But she too has since passed…and I am sure she would not mind me calling her name as I celebrate her.   (though I doubt that calling any of the names in the related blogs would have bother any of my friends…but I just prefer not to)

Sister Capers had a long badge around her neck and said that the hospital allowed her full access to walk around to talk and pray for people.  She touched me and began to pray for me.  But it was the sight of seeing her…a friend come into that emergency room and stepped into my curtained off area that meant so much to me.   It was something I had not expected at all.

The pain killers and muscle relaxers began to work too…and after a few hours they released me giving me a couple of prescriptions…which I did go and get filled immediately.  And this time I took some of that medication…a couple of times in fact.  But I found it to be exceedingly strong.  And after taking it…yes, it helped the pain in my back…but I was left feeling sick to my stomach…in fact my stomach would be cramping. 

So, I stop taking the medicatjon.  Some medication today will correct one problem…but leave with something else to deal with.  If  that be the case…you should seriously weigh your options. 

What good would it have been for me to relieve by back pain (a temporary condition)…only to have burned a hole through my stomach?

Finally, the pain left…or rather I guess I should say….my disc slipped back into place.  But without having been at mother’s house I probably would not have gone to the hospital…nor would have known exactly what my problem was…and Sister Capers would not have been able to pay me a surprise visit and then pray for me.   I am happy that I elected to stay the night in New York.

So, you see in this blog that I have some friends who are going through some trying life circumstances themselves…yet because of their walk and faith in the Lord…they are bigger than what they are going through. They have managed to turn what many would say should have been their tears into smiles.   And in the process they have not been too pre-occupied with their own health issues to not be able to reach out and comfort others in their time of need.  I think that this is wonderful…and I thoroughly enjoyed talking with them as they shared their stories with me. 

I do know some phenomenal  people…they are special in every possible way.

I just could not let this day go by without sharing with you something about them.

After looking at these videos of the Whispers…I now regret having not gone through and done that ‘Headlights’ Concert which I had booked them for.  But when the tickets didn’t start moving…and the venue called  telling me that if I didn’t rush in there with the advance ticket money and bring in all the tickets that we had put out there in the various locations…that they were going to cancel the show. I felt was left with no choice.

So, as much as I didn’t want to make that call to L.A…I did.  I actually dredded calling L.A to have a conversation about cancelling the show…2 days before it was to take place.  But I did it.  I called the Whisper’s manager and told him that I was forced to cancel the show.    And this is what he said to me in response-

“What do you mean you are being forced to cancel the show?  It’s your show…your money. They can’t force you to cancel your own show.”

And you know what he was right…it was my show.  It was my money…not that large auditorium but my money that was on the line for that show.  The venue hadn’t bought the radio time for the spots…or placed any newspaper ads announcing my concert.  I was the one.

No, I was the only one invested in that concert…and I was the only one who stood to loose anything any kind of way it went.  Because I was the one responsible for paying everybody…including the venue…though I had already paid them a portion of it…that was not going to come back to me even after the cancellation.

But it was too bad I called the Whispers last…I had already pulled all the tickets…cancelled the remainder of the radio ads and then had the radio stations to start announcing that-

“Tomorrow night’s concert featuring the Whisper’s Headlights Tour is cancelled.”

That is when I realized I had had a slave mentality.  I had let that white man who booked the events at the auditorium dictate to me the lost of a very very large sum of money.  Something which will never ever happen to me again.  It was a life experience…and life experiences are made for us to learn from.

There are times when we can block our own success…by failing to believe in ourselves or what we are attempting to do.  But if you start a thing…you should be big enough to see it through.  Don’t try to second guess yourself.  Either do it…or don’t do it.  But do not kid yourself  by starting something that you are afraid of seeing through.

Monday is President’s  Day…so if you are one of those fortunate ones…I know when I worked in radio there no such thing as a holiday…particularly if you were at the low end of the totem pole.  But if you by chance you are one of those who does have the day off enjoy it. 

Isn’t  it wonderful…we now get to really celebrate that day.  I mean not that there were not other presidents who were great…but mostly they became great by being thrust into some difficult situations that forced them  to make during their times some very hard decisions.  But isn’t it interesting how being forced to make hard decisions can often work out for the good…when the right choices are made.  And make you great…as opposed to being  ‘just one of.’   Washington, Lincoln, Roosevelt, Kennedy and Johnson may all be considered to be great Presidents because of the times and the decisions they were forced to make…and Washington simply because he was the first.

Abraham Lincoln did not have a great love for the freedom of slaves but he recognized the danger it caused to the union of all of the then 13 states of the United States of America coming together.  Slavery was the thing which tore them apart…so it made sense that slavery was the thing that had to end in order for this country to be able to move forward in order to be able to tackle the other events and things that a growing America would come to face as a nation.

It’s Black History Month…and I certainly salute it and celebrate it.  There are so many great people…inventors, doctors, lawyers, writers, news journalists, actors, orators, wise people, civic leaders, religious people, hard working desent black people who were purposely left out of the history books of this country.  I think it is time to right that error as well.

The road was not easy but they carried the torches anyhow… knowing that one day a change was going to come.

http://www.howard.edu/library/Reference/Guides/Hamer/default.htm

http://www.sweetsandbody.com/new_africa/newafrica.html

http://www.notablebiographies.com/Br-Ca/Brooks-Gwendolyn.html

http://www.csu.edu/gwendolynbrooks/

http://web.co.wake.nc.us/lee/vf/cr/demo/19600319nsin/10600319nsin.htm

Well, God bless…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com  ©2009