Posts filed under: ‘Parenting‘
Well, it is Black History Month. And I really can’t remember when this actually took place… the year when a young 15 year old youth went south to Mississippi from Chicago, to spend the summer with relatives in the south.
In looking back at a newspaper article on the story, I see where it took place in 1955. The summer Emmett Till went to spend what was to be his lastsummer visiting those cousins, and an aunt and uncle down south. Because somewhere during that visit in August 1955 it was said
that Emmett took certainly liberties with some white woman. He got out of place… he crossed that divide that colored and white were not to cross… because he was just being a young innocent kid… unaware of the do’s and the don’t of the then… and maybe still in some parts of the south.
Supposedly young Emmett while in this woman’s family store had told the white woman how he had dated a woman just like her up in Chicago. And upon leaving the store it was said that young Emmett Till gave that woman 1 of those big long whistles, that men did back in that time when they thought a woman was beautiful… somewhat of a wolf call or something.
It was that story of Emmett Till which always colored me and my thoughts about how when you leave home… if you lived north of the Mason/Dixon Line… how you should behave very differently if you were to go down south.
Something like how you had to remember when you crossed that line …that Mason/Dixon Line going into the south, that you were no longer in the north… or in your little Northern town or big city, like Chicago or Detroit. And how remembering this… that this ‘black and white thang’ could possibly save your life.
I recall once just we had crossed that line 1 summer on 1 our many drives south to visit my grand mother in the south, that once we pulled up to a motel where my mother sent me out to go inside and ask how much it would cost to get a room?
An occasional stop at a motel to freshen up used to be a habit of my family sometimes while we were making the more that 20 hour trip down south to Florida. But this particular day as I almost was about to reach for the door leading into the motel office, out came running two black boys… or teens… something I couldn’t really tell how old they were as they came running through that door shouting back to me, ‘Get of of here! Go! Go!’
I immediately ran back to our car and reported to my mother and father what those 2 boys had told me as they had whizzed pass me and shouted for me to get out of there.
Suddenly, my mother started screaming at me to get in the car… and she started hollering they ain’t gonna take my sons. ‘They ain’t gonna take my sons.’
Boy, I had never seen anything like it or ever heard my mother react in such a way. But years later I understood.
At that time my brothers were young kids… maybe 10 or 11 or something like that. But my mother having grown up in the south… my being a Jamaican had grew up in Jamaica so he had not really experienced any that Jim Crow stuff of the deep south. But my mother knew it well. And she knew that it would not matter to white folks that my brothers had not robbed or done whatever those 2 boys had done… but that they were black and that in of itself would have been enough for my young brothers to have been taken …in place of the real crooks or whatever they were who had come running out of that motel office.
I do not think we ever again stopped at another motel in all the years we continued to travel back and forth to Florida after that.
For years, I think that up until this very point I had always felt that Emmett Till should have been told how to behave, and carry himself while down there in the south. I always thought it was his mother’s fault for not sitting him down, and telling him how to behave down there when it came to being around white folks. It was the typical blaming that many people do when they blame the dead for being dead. Like some people blame Trayvon Martin for being out late… or out in the rain in that white neighborhood when he got shot and killed.
I thought that way because I was stupid. I was blind. Ignorant of the fact that many times it just didn’t matter what we did do or not, irregardless there was a very likely could still come up dead
He was a kid. And you could have told him something a thousand times, and would you believe you wouldn’t have to tell him it again… as we all do when it comes to talking to our children?
Emmett Till did not live in the south. Nor was there any reason for me to believe that what had been said regarding that story had been true. For you see, evidently I had believed something inappropriate must have been done for those white men to go in the middle of the night seeking this young boy, regarding something something he had said and/or done.
That is the irony of it. How readily we eat up the things we see or hear.
It had been a lie. It had all been a lie. And because some white woman had lied on her son, Mrs. Till was forced to go down to Mississippi and collect the bloated remains of her young teen age son, her only child… I think… and bring him back to Chicago in order to bury him.
Years later after Emmett Till had been viciously murder by a group of white men in the middle of the night, after going to his relative’s house and demanding that they send him out to them or they would burn them out and all up in their home.
How could that woman possibly live with herself after that?
Years later, I moved to Chicago and while working as a church secretary for a pastor by the name of Dr. A. L. Reynolds, Jr., I was told something by Dr. Reynolds, who pastored Sixth Grace United Presbyterian Church, at Cottage Grove and 35th Street, on the South Side.
Dr. Reynolds 1 day came into the office and for some reason began telling a story, of how he had had to run away from his home, which had been back in Arkansas. The reason he had to pick up and get out of there he told me, was because some white woman wanted him and he didn’t want her. That is exactly how he put it. He said, ‘she wanted me. But I didn’t want her. So, I had to leave.’ Because I did not want her to lie on me. Because in those days a white woman could say a black man raped her and they (meaning the other white people… mostly men) would kill him.
So, Dr. Reynolds said he got of Arkansas as quickly as he could.
And he said he left Arkansas running because he didn’t want her to tell a lie on him.
Through the our history in this country many black people have found it necessary to get up and get out of town in the middle of night, headed north or to other points unknown. Because they were afraid of some type of bad consequence which might take hold upon them… or befall them due to a lie… or some white person wanting something that belonged to them.
It comes to mind that even in Biblical text Abram lied. He was forced to lie when he and Sarah went to enter Egypt. And he became afraid that the king… otherwise known as Pharaoh… would want his wife, Sarai…as she was then before being renamed by God Sarah. Because the Bible says she was fair and goodly to look upon.
So, Abram felt that he would be killed by Pharaoh. So, therefore, told Sarai that they should say that he was her brother rather than her husband.
The end of this story is that Pharaoh and the people of his kingdom are overtaken by what the Bible calls a ‘great plague.’ Pharaoh questions Abram and asked him why he had not told him that the woman, Sarai… was his wife?
We come into the 21st Century now, some more than 60 years later and now we hear that the white woman who had told her husband and his white buddies, that Emmett Till had whistled and spoken to her… a white woman inappropriately… that she had lied.
All that pain and heartbreak … tears shed had been over a lie.
A young boy was pulled and dragged out into the dark of night… tortured and beaten …then partially burned and thrown into the river… to be found days later a bloated beyond recognition dead decomposing body. Because that woman lied. And now …I guess on her death bed… or on her near death bed she tells the truth… that she lied about the whole thing.
How did that woman do that… when she knew what the consequences for any black man would be?
She knew what times she lived in. But just did not care. She told that lie knowing that some out of control white drunken men were going to go and find them a white boy, and have what they called ‘have some fun.’ While they enjoyed torturing him and beating him…and eventually killing him.
How did this young boy respond?
Can you imagine what was going through his mind and heart… scared beyond his wits…
kicked…slapped…punched… stomped… cut… lit on fire…
And all because some white woman thought it nothing to lie on him. And me thinking years later that it had been his fault… because nobody every trained him properly how to behave around white folks.
This reminds me of how I hear black commentators on television now when they are talking about black men being shot and killed by white police officers. Everybody saying they should have kept their hands on the dashboard… or where they could be seen… or not moved too quickly… etc… etc… etc….
Blaming the victim because racist people still abound….
Well, God bless… It was sleeting a little bit this morning. But I hope it is nice and warm
where you are. Have a good day all… and remember it’s BLACK HISTORY MONTH. “pass it on…” http://www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2017
Add a comment February 8, 2017
I’m sorry but I can definitely not agree.
I understand how the world now feels that it must agree with every whim that comes rolling along, in order to not offend anyone.
But what about what is right?
Should we forsake everything that is right in order to appease everything in this world?
I think not. And I also believe it puts this world … though it has already been… on the road to destruction long ago… but it is just edging closer and closer to it.
It appears to me that we at this moment in history …we are creating our own pitfalls and devastation.
You cannot run with everything and believe you will finish the race successfully. Somewhere along the line something falls… or everything begins to fall out of your arms. This means you loose something.
We are loosing many things these days… and it mostly boils down to primarily loosing our way as people… as a civilization …as people who live in a ‘real world.’ Not a make-believe world… anything we want to be… or anything we want it to be world. But a REAL WORLD… with REAL WORLD ORDER… standards… qualifications… variety… and variances created by God. Not by us.
God created this world order. And He created it as He would have it to be.
Can man upset world balance?
Yes, man can.
When we go tinkering with things which we should not be tinkering with problems are sure to arise. And they have.
This whole cross dressing and transgender thing is going to destroy this planet. And this thing is booming.
There is a problem which arises when we start picking and choosing what gender we decide we should be. Or maybe what gender we decide we are going to raise our children as being… like saying you wanted a boy but got a girl.
So, you arbitrarily decide you are call your girl Sam and dress her only in clothes of boys… and have her live her life as Sam. And never let her in on the fact that she is a girl… but tell and teach her as if she is boy.
So, Sally grows up believing that she is Sam. Now, this is hypothetical. I just going somewhere with this scenario.
Now, Sally did not realize until some time in school that she … or rather he (Sam) was different from all the other boys. She noticed that perhaps she looked more like a girl. Then she noticed that she had started to develop breasts. When she was in the boy’s bathroom she noticed that she was missing something that all the other boys seem to have when they peed.
But you raised Sally believing that she was Sam.
You thought that you were God. That you could create whatever you wanted your child to be. When God gave you the child He had deemed for you… a girl… not a boy.
Now, Sam is having problems at school. He is disassociating from all the other kids. He feels that he does not fit in. He feels different.
Most of us grew up feeling different. Many of us grew up feeling like we didn’t fit in. These are natural emotions for kids to go through… except for those who happen be popular and always seem to be in the midst of plenty of people who rush to be with them.
But you weren’t 1 of them. When you look into the mirror you see somebody else. You feel like if you could be somebody else… that then you would be happy. Maybe you wish you were your sister or brother or a different sex. Or your mom or dad. And you begin to become that someone else.
Kids are always pretending… and playing make believe. But when does this become something else for some kids or teens… or even adults?
It becomes something else as long as you harbor or meditate of being that different person… that you begin to fantasize yourself to be. And after a while you meet up with someone… because it only takes 1 mixed up and highly confused person to send you on a trip you may never come back from… a trip to convert yourself into a fantasy you.
It is all make believe. Because we are who we are… and there is no changing it no matter how many pills are taken. How deep the voice may get… or how much facial hairs you get… or breasts you develop. You really can’t change you.
Oh, outwardly yes. But inwardly… no. And that inside person who really determines who you truly are. And it goes beyond your DNA… and THAT you definitely cannot change.
So, you change your name, your driver’s license, your city or town… and the pretense really begins. Because you are looking for a fresh start as this ‘new you.’
Though you may be able to deceive many people. The issue is… how long can you keep up the pretense. Because everyday you step out the door pretending to be who you were not born to be is really just a pretense… and you will never ever be able to get away from that.
What I find interesting is how in the world do people who go through all this really believe that becoming …or attempting to become another gender means that they are not gay?
Do they not want to engage in sexual activity with someone of the sex they are pretending to no longer be?
Then how can this not be gay behavior?
Oh, because you now associate yourself as the opposite sex… and call yourself ‘he’ rather than ‘she’… you believe that you automatically became the ‘he’ or ‘she’ you wanted to be?
Do not deceive yourself. It is all a charade. And the only 1 who got fooled was you.
Men who want men… are not going to go for a man who becomes a woman. Because if they wanted a woman they could get a ‘real’ woman… not some one pretending to be 1.
Women who love women… might like a dyke looking woman… many like that … but not all. But if a woman wanted a man, do you not believe she could find herself a ‘real’ man… and not someone playing and eating pills to be 1?
And therein lays the problem for these people who get these sex changes. They discover that that fantastic change that they were hoping for … that was going to make them happy ever after because they were now who and what they felt they had truly been born to be… wasn’t the happy every after that they hoped it would be.
Come on wake up.
So, no I’m not in agreement to the Boys Scouts of America allowing transgender girls into the scouts. Because primarily… because these girls are still girls. Down beneath they still have their vagina.
So, what happens if out on the trail a couple of over zealous boys decide to teach her a thing or 2?
As quietly as it is kept in the military this is quite an issue. Female women in the military get raped… and this happens in large numbers. Female girls on campuses get raped… and this too happens in large numbers… as much as most campuses try to squash it from getting out.
It is a reality.
And why would any girls really want to put herself through watching a bunch of boys with ranging hormones …taking a leak.
And no, I am not into transgender bathrooms either.
And I do not believe I have to go along in order to get along.
I will not forsake my core principles in order to make other people happy. I just cannot do it.
Do you really want me to become a liar by calling him ‘she’ when I know that he is not
I can’t go to hell trying to play other people’s games. I am sorry… and I mean you no
harm. But just do not ask me to play.
And I do not believe in being politically right… when politically right goes against my religious right to not lie… or condone lying or stealing… or deceiving… or fornicating… or adultery … and you know the rest. I just cannot.
So, don’t ask me. Because I have enough things that I may have to answer for of my own without me playing your game …adding to my list…
Now that I have addressed my thoughts on this subject please enjoy the rest of your week. And I know that I’ll get a few responses on this… but that’s is okay.
We are not all going to agree. But 1 thing is for sure we trying to agree on too many things… when most people who play like they agree really do not. So, at least I am honest. And I am not a hater… but a firm believer that the truth is the truth… and hopefully because I spoke truth somebody will be set free…
And anyone… so-called parent who does this thing purposely to their child or children really should be arrest for child abuse. Because they putting their child into the pit of hell… and creating for them a life that cannot lead them to any form of happiness by playing something that they are not.
Do not ruin the life of your child by making them a transgender child. One thing when a person who is old enough to decide certain things for themselves. And quite another when crazy parents do it to their children.
Well, God bless… I’m out. Thanks for reading my blogs. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” http://www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2017
Add a comment January 31, 2017
I would be the last person to criticize or make a mockery of anyone’s child, as I too am a mother of a gay child. The irony of it all is that I too was once gay… or as I like to say, ‘I was in the life.’
So, coming to grips with my son being gay should have been an easy thing for me right?
It worried me. It plagued me. And at times in the beginning shamed me. I went through the whole gambit of emotions trying to deal with it mentally. And truthfully speaking just did not want to accept it… and I still don’t but for other reasons I will get to later in this blog.
But through it all my love of my son never tethered. I have always loved him. In fact, I will go as far to say, ‘That I even adore him.’ And I have always recognized that he was a far better person than his mother.
I recall while teaching several years ago there was a young male student that sought me out to talk to me about his relationship with his family. His family was made up of Saved people who rejected him. They made him feel bad about himself and about the lifestyle he had gravitated toward. He felt trapped because he loved them… but could not deny his sexuality
He was a handsome boy… smart and I could tell that he was kind and loved his family deeply. But their feelings towards him tormented him. They were pushing him away… and out of their lives. They didn’t want him in their house. And I guess it is fair to say that the very sight of him made them sick.
What a shame. They obviously did not know …or could not see the type of person they had really birthed into this world. Because he was worth celebrating… and not rejecting.
While in the life I had encountered many gay guys with similar stories of rejection. Many covered up their alternate lifestyles… or attempted to …or so they thought. Because they did not want the rejection… someth
Many fell away from the church because the church laughed at them… made jokes about them and ‘limp wrist.’ The church turned its back on them and attempted to make them hate themselves. In response to that many became drug abuser…
started drinking heavily… and many even attempted and did commit suicide. And then there were those who broke down mentally and began having mental problems because of the rejection, and the feeling that they had let down their families.
I have seen many sad and lost gay men and women who suffered the pains of family rejection… church rejection and community rejection. In those days there were not gay people all over the TV like today… or all these Hollywood stars walking around proclaiming their gayness as we see today. Or all these anti-gay laws as we see today… or legislation of gay rights and gay marriages etc..
But back in the day there were just a lot of lost souls seeking to find themselves, who seemed to only find 1 place where they felt they really fitted… and that was in the gay lifestyle. Being gay… and I was 1 of them.
Oh, yes… I was 1 of them. I’m free today …and of that yoked of bondage that had once had me bound… but many still are lost. And because of all these new acceptances such as the changing of one’s sex… this whole thing has gotten more and more crazier. And it has fooled a lot of them into believing by doing all these crazy things they will find happiness.
The devil is a liar… and the great deceiver.
I came out of the life when S&M started to become the big rage. More and more gay people were slipping into the bondage thing… and I could just not wrap my head around that. It was not for me. I could not see me allowing anybody to tie me up or handcuff me… or otherwise rendering me helpless while they beat me and did whatever else they wanted to do to me. I could not see the intrigue in that sexually or any other kind of way.
During my time in the life there had always been cross-dressers, drag queens, transvestites etc. But this thing of wanting to become and man if you are a woman ….or a women if you are a man may not be new. But it certainly was not popular. And that is what it is today… popular. And it is very popular … as popular as people tattooing their bodies or piercing themselves all over the place.
But I did not begin this blog to really talk about any of what I just wrote. I really wanted to write about Sade’s daughter.
When I was in the life… it was Sade I longed for. She was so sexy to me. I loved everything about her… including all her music. I bought everything she put out. But then lets face it… her music was good. She was different and had a style all of her own… and I guess that attracted me more than anything else.
I will never forget that for 1 of my birthday’s a friend gave me a large framed picture of Sade, which I hung in my living room. And I would often just stare at it.
Yeah, I was crazy… in love. Sade was fine… but so was my then girlfriend, Angela. Where I would have chosen Sade… many would have chosen Angela hands down. And yes, Angela was quite beautiful. She was exotic in many ways. She had a British accent, and was part Jamaican and Chinese. And she was brilliant… and she was the person who withstood me for the longest… 10 years. She liked telling that story.
When I spoke with her last she informed me that she too had found Christ Jesus, and was reading the Bible daily. I was very happy to hear that as Angela had grown up Catholic and had very conflicting thoughts about God and religion. But there was 1 thing she had said about me… she knew even then… that 1 day I would become woman of God. I guess there was something about me… and it had to do with my training. It was the fact that I grew up in the church… and that training kept me from crossing certain lines… such as drinking or doing drugs… or smoking etc. Where many had been rejected I was not because I did not look a certain way. I could pass… and no one except keen women who were also in the life could spot me.
But I did not cuss or live a riotous life… and I knew nothing about living badly, as my parents were real church people… loving and caring… and giving unto others church people. So, they were my role models… and there was 1 thing about them. They never ever spoke to me about being gay… and I never ever flaunted anything like that in front of them… though they never restricted me in being me.
So, Sade’s daughter is gay. And by looking over the pictures of her and her daughter I can tell that Sade, who took time off from her career as a recording artist for a few years to give birth and begin raising her daughter… that Sade never once thought to reject her daughter.
Seeing pictures of Michael Jordan and his daughter, Jasmine…he too seems to be an accepting father of his child. She is quite attractive… they both are Michael’s daughter and Sade’s daughter. And Magic’s son, Erwin… after having lost over a hundred pounds is quite handsome himself.
Many people can’t deal with sexuality issues and their children. Everybody at some point has had to battle through something. Many adults … parents often forget the headaches they caused their parents… and the many sleepless night they took their parents through when it comes time to deal with their own children.
In life people are always in a state of transformation. Their taste in food changes… clothes changes… thoughts on various subjects change… and they change… they mature… they gain wisdom… and if all goes right they discover who they really are. This is why I am so anti-sex changes… because I understand clearly the changes that people go through from their early stages to their latter stages… and no one is ever the same or thinks the same way.
I sometimes go back and look up old gay friends on Facebook and I can truly say… I am so thankful that I am no longer in the life. They seem so old to me… so sad… and seem to not have grown. We look different… them and me. But then the hand of God is upon my life and has always been.
As Sade’s daughter travels through this life it will be interesting to see the changes and turns her life will too take… as well as Michael Jordan’s daughter and Magic’s son. There is this old song that Donny Hathaway used to sing called ‘Everything Must Change.’ And it goes on to say ...’nothing remains the same.’ That is BUT ‘God.’
And the great thing about God… He loves us all… no matter what pit we happen to fall in. And He is able to reach down and bring us all out.
I no longer fantasy over Sade. Nor do I listen to her music. I’m on a different path… and as my parents prayed for me… I too pray for my son that God does the same for him as He did for me. And I pray for my friends and the many many many others who are lost. It doesn’t matter what they may or may not be in… but if they are not walking in the steps which God has ordered then prayer is the most powerful tool we can use to help… with the hope that God too will favor them and call them out from among them.
God bless… I’ve got to get out of here now. Somebody is probably going to write me saying I thought this blog was supposed to be about Sade’s daughter. And to a degree it was…
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” http://www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2016
Add a comment April 20, 2016
Wow, I don’t even know what happened here. I lost my whole post all most.
I will try to rewrite it again but don’t know if it will be as good as the first. But here goes.
I came across this posting on a site called, MOTHER’S PEARLS. And since the day I initially posted my blog on the DeBarge family and their deep family secret which tormented them for years, that post hands down has been my most popular.
That being so I thought that many of you would also like to read what was said by Tommy DeBarge, who for years as growing up had been molested by his older brother, Bobby.
It cannot be a secret how much pain must go through 1 when they are physically violated. But that pain and hurt must be much deeper when it does not come from the man or woman down the street… but is within your own home… among those who are suppose to love and care for you… and protect you.
The DeBarge children had … I guess all of them… had be sexually abused by their father… both the girls and boys.
The damage that is done to children who experience sexual abuse cannot be overstated. I know this first hand having also been a victim of it, though it was not within the confines of my family.
I know some women who once worked at a facility that housed children sexual offenders. Yes, I said, CHILDREN SEXUAL OFFENDERS. I asked 1 day what were the ages of the children in their facility and I was told, “Well, the youngest is 3.”
That has always stayed with. I cannot image what it is like to be locked away from people for the rest of your life because someone began sexually abusing as an infant or toddler and at the age of 3 they have to lock you away.
The world indeed is a very cruel place… very cruel. And has gotten crueler with all of this child sex trafficking and everything else like it that goes on today.
For that kind of torment to be going on in your own home is something which a very beautiful family of children have had to fight to regain and sustain some type of sanity from the horrors they had to endure not only at the hands of their own father… but as their own siblings began to prey upon them.
As a note here, Bobby the oldest of the DeBarge children died many years ago from AIDS. His predator… his father who had sexually abused … I guess all of his children… Their father died only several years ago… and am sure if he had a conscience he died a very tormented man.
This is from Mother’s Pearls: http://www.pearlswindow.com/2013/06/tommy-debarge-shares-molestation-by.html
Men were attracted to men and openly spoke their minds about it, which offended me because of my past with Bobby. I felt as if something queer had been permanently affixed to me because of the horrible things he did to me.
At this point, Bobby was dating women. There was a brief period of time when I actually thought Bobby might be straight. However, as he became more sure of himself as an artist and comfortable in his surroundings, the more he openly expressed his desire for men.
I watched as homosexuality manifested itself in Bobby’s life. He had a stronger attraction towards men than women. He had a male friend, Tony, whom he had met in California, and whom accompanied him everywhere.
After a while, Bobby removed all restraints from his sexual desires. He didn’t care if his private life was private or exposed. He was staying at a Hollywood Hotel; Tony moved in.
Later, Bobby revealed himself to be bisexual, meaning that he participated in sex with both men and women. He stated that a man’s love is what he was searching for because women were only useful for sexual pleasure and couldn’t be trusted. He used neglect and abuse from the past as an excuse for his lifestyle.
Add a comment March 8, 2016
It is hard to know where to begin with this blog since I have so many different things on my mind. But let me begin with this…
As I just came across it on a Facebook post… where the mayor in Houston had proposed to allow transgender people to legally use the bathroom facilities that they identify with.
Needless to say… why write certain things into law?
They already do it. So, such a thing is really kind of stupid. But the other side of the coin is this …writing such a thing into law opens the door for many women to become victimized by men looking for new opportunities in ways to victimize women. What I mean by this is this.
Most times women go into a bathroom… it is usually not full… not unless you are at a club or some large social setting. A lot of times we are the only ones in bathrooms. When we enter the ladies room we do not expect anyone stronger than us to overpower us and shove us into stalls to rape us… or to carry out any other type of crime that people perpetrate against women. But such a city ordinance would open the door for such a thing to happen to women. As just anybody could walk into any bathroom they wanted and not necessarily have in mind the intention of using the toilet.
Not to mention women often allow their children to go into the ladies room… most of the time under their care. But such an ordinance would put at risk both a mother and a child if a deranged person were watching them… and then followed them into a co-ed bathroom. Whereas such a person entering into the ladies’ room would easily be spotted if the bathroom facilities were not co-ed.
In places where perpetrators look for unsuspecting victims …such as in movie theaters and amusement parks where there are always large number of children this type of policy would be very disastrous.
But is this thing right?
I say, ‘No.’
And it is a resounding ‘no.’
Perhaps I am a little bit too caution. Or maybe you just think I am being super homophobic. But it is not the homosexuals I am thinking about. I’m thinking about the people who would take such an ordinance and use it to prey upon certain people…such as unsuspecting women and possible children, as many times children do go into bathrooms with their mothers. And these people are not gay… they are rapists… child molesters… predators of every sort.
And believe me… I would rather fall on the side of a little per-caution rather than hearing someone say, ‘I’m sorry. We never dreamed this sort of thing would happen.’
All this might stem from the fact that I was abused as a child. I really don’t know. Or it may stem from the fact that I have been stalked several times. Now, that I do know.
I think about it this way… if it ain’t broke ‘don’t fix it.’
What is wrong with having the women’s bathroom for women, and the men’s bathroom for the men?
Has not that system worked all these years?
With regards to the home situation… Well, is totally different. We are at home. We all know each other… ans supposedly nobody is trying to prey upon another. We grow up using bathrooms inside the home as a family. But in public the same principles do not apply. And it has always been broken down as facilities for men… and separate facilities for women.
Why mess with that now?
One could say that this is the problem that we have with our medical system in this country today. Who in the world started messing with it?????
We had a system that used to work. People used to be able to see qualified doctors not just people tied into their medical plans, who only issue prescriptions for medication manufacturers tied to pharmaceutical companies who own their plans… to whom their now doctors are also tied to. Kind of a vicious little circle… called lets keep the money in-house. And that is exactly what they do… if they can.
Sure our old medical system might have had issues… lets face it nothing is perfect. But it had worked fine for hundreds… maybe thousands of years more or less as it was. The pluses were (1) you could pick and chose your own doctors. (2) Hospitals had to treat people whether they had insurance or not. And (3) if a doctor wasn’t working for you… you could just pick up your marbles and go to another one without asking the doctor you are trying to rid yourself of… to write you a ‘referral.’
Who thought of this ‘doctor’s referral‘ thing?
We are not children. Why do we need to ask a doctor ‘may I?’
Or ‘can I?’
And if they won’t then… you can’t. You are just plain STUCK.
That is just a little bit too much control over patients if you asked me.
But going back to my original issue with removing ‘MEN’ and ‘WOMEN‘ signs from public toilets….or those little pictures that mean ‘MEN’ or ‘WOMEN’ toilet facilities. I clearly understand what probably escapes many people… is that who is going to get blamed when stuff starts going wrong with making such an sane which to our long established system of public toilet facilities.
Most people like to believe that the people who perpetrate crimes on children… particularly on boys… little boys are all gay. If you only knew. Nothing could be further from the truth. If you could only hear some of the gay guys talking on this subject, then you would certainly know THAT to be a lie. Most gay men… and women… if not all of them… hate people who perpetrate sexual crimes against children …or anyone else for that matter.
I know personally that many gay people get mad when these people… sexual perverts such as NAMBLER… North American Man/Boy Love Association… attempt to tie or associate themselves to the gay community. Mostly because those men involved in that kind of thing are not gay. They think of themselves as straight men who merely love having sex with very very young boys. These men are low life predators. A bunch of six depraved men with warped minds. Of whom I have absolutely no tolerance whatsoever for.
The Nambler men are sexual deviants straight out of hell who prey upon very very young boys while living what appears to be very regular lives as heterosexual men… and men who seek out very very young little girls to do the same… they are just as intolerable. They are all highly deceitful. Many are married and/or have girlfriends… some even have their own children.
We are living in a time when laws and ordinances are being created and made that will cause more harm to our society … than at any other time. And crimes are becoming more and more heinous… and laws more and more lacks.
Who thought of legalizing marijuana?
Who approved it?
Now, you not only have to careful and the lookout for drunken drivers… or those under the influence of all those other long recognized nonlegal and legal drugs out there. But now also have to be on the lookout for people driving around buzzed… under the influence of marijuana, whose system is just as whacked out and as much impacted by effects of marijuana as anyone who has been drinking or using some other narcotic drug.
Now, these guys are selling marijuana stocks and bonds on Wall Street to fund their marijuana farms.
This whole thing is becoming very insane. My father would say… ‘the world is going out backwards.’ And it truly is.
Pandora’s box is being left wide open. And there is no turning back the terrible tide that it is unleashing upon this world.
Fools and depraved minds have taken over our Courts and government. They are creating laws and writing into place legislation that are turning this world upside down.
Having been in ‘the life‘ for many years, of course, I do understand why gay people wanted the right to be legally married. I myself had personally witnessed and knew of several relationships where one partner or lover had died. After having spent many years together I saw where families stepped in following the death of their family member deciding to take over everything from the surviving lover in that relationship… including the funeral arrangements. Just ripping everything out of the hands of the surviving partner or lover.
They may have had amassed a house… and/or a business… or other items purchased and/or paid for together… or co-owned by the both of them… but in came their family. They took control over the dead body… and eventually forced the surviving partner out.
So, yes I can understand how having some level of law to protect what 2 people had accumulated together would be helpful to them. Particularly in light of greedy family members… who many times cast off their gay family member years ago… only to re-emerge following their death to declare to their surviving lover ‘you don’t own anything here… and get out.’ But then I have seen that in heterosexual relationships too… where people lived together for years and failed to marry.
But did the law governing marriage have to be rewritten to provide for that is my question?
I think not. That right could have been gotten a whole entire way without trying to redefine marriage as something other than what God intended marriage to be… and between whom He intended it be between.
But their are people who have been put in place to bring about any change that delights that other spirit that also inhabits this world. Just a chosen few people in the right places is all it takes to set about a change that effects everyone in the land. And that is the problem with our system… it doesn’t take the masses to do it any more.
Today just a small group of people can decide to do something… and BAM! It is done. Things changed that you never thought you would see changed.
Who would have guessed that marijuana would ever get legalized in this country?
Next it will be crack cocaine… then cocaine and everything else. Why not… it all makes money?
Even lying after Bush became acceptable if it somehow can be seen to serve greater good. Or some kind of meaningful …or in Bush’s case devante purpose. But nobody started throwing stones at him when they finally found out he lied about ‘weapons of mass destruction,’ as a means for him to invade Iraq and start an unnecessary war, in order to push up gas prices and make his family richer. And that it ended up killing millions of Americans, mostly young college kids for no good cause.
There is someone somewhere making BIG BUCKS from marijuana …and that you can bet your money on it. Otherwise, how did marijuana stocks hit the stock market so quickly?
And who are the really people cashing in on it?
Probably the people who have always been at the top of the illegal American drug trade in the first place.
No, there are things happening in our government today… that even those guys on Capitol Hill… the insiders know and are dealing with …who are pulling all the strings to our never before. And because we now live in a global economy… our inter-actions in the global world… wield lots of global influence… that person or persons may not even be American… nor Americans. But they are for real.
They are getting things done that no of us ever dreamed would ever be done. And the change that they are effecting is not for the good of this country.
Not at all.
If, indeed, legislators were legitimately looking to legislate some good policy they should take a look at the evils in this world and sincerely seeks ways to remove and/or lessen them… not open the doors for more to come about.
But the 1 thing that stays on my mind about that whole thing is how nearly 300 school girls were kidnapped from their school… and nobody did nothing?
How did that happen?
Most of the problem in this case stems from world interest in this story and the fact that the Nigerian government officials do not want the involvement of outsider aid… such as the United States… in assisting them in freeing the girls … or seeking freedom for them. Most of it boils down to political pride on the part of the Nigerian officials not wanting it to be seen as they cannot handle their own affairs. Of which they evidently cannot based upon the kidnapping of these young girls they are in dire need of some help… from someone.
Why be so proud that you cannot accept assistance in such a matter as this?
It is foolish. If any of the government official’s daughters were involved they wouldn’t be able to accept help quick enough. But it is evident that none of their daughters is at risk.
There is no telling as to what is happening to those young girls when you consider the treatment of women who have be taken by such groups as the bunch of criminals who claimed that they took these girls. It is not uncommon for women/girls to be raped, beaten and abused in an array of various ways including sold into bondage and prostitution.
I am thankful we have a President who cares about Africa …and her people. Thank you, President Obama.
I know people are going to think I am whack-co but since I am on the subject let me take a moment to go back and hit upon this subject regarding transgender individuals as well. It appears to me that this whole thing is becoming more and more rampant. It has become a trend …and it is growing fast.
There was once a time when transgender and yes, even drag queens were kind of looked down upon. But a boom is on to change all of that. Their ranks are growing… and growing even at early ages.
It is almost becoming a fab now among many in the gay community. Kind of like all this body piercing and tattooing that has grown so popular… and tattooing lately. And not only has it become popular… trendy… but it is even becoming acceptable to many outside of the gay community.
Few people used to talk about such things as ‘I feel like I was born to be a man’ if they were a woman… or vise versa. But there is lots of chatter about that now. The seeds have been laid… and it has become like a ranging fire swirling out of control.
It kind of reminds of my niece saying to me 1 Sunday, ‘Auntie, I don’t want to go to this church any more. I’m not being fed.’
Not being fed?
What did she know about not being fed. It was not she like she was saved or anything… or even paying any attention much during our church services. But she had heard someone else said it. And that was all she needed… to being her own reverberating of those words ‘I’m not being fed.’
The true being told no church was going to feed her spiritually as she, at that point, was not really interested in being in church at all anyways.
So, what I am trying to say here is this… all these people declaring that they are something other than what God created them to be… be it male or female. They have been bitten by a bug… and the world today is full of people who follow what other people do. This stems from hearing something like ‘I never felt comfortable being a girl’… following somebody sitting on some television show… national, of course… sounding and looking every bit like a man or ever bit like a woman. And the viewer internalizes that notion and begins feeling and saying that exact same thing… as they start working their way to becoming a transitioning something or other.
It is really rather sad to me. But who knows …when the devil had me… he really had me too. So, who knows if this trend had been so hot and heavy in my days what I might not have elected to do it too?
Perhaps I should not cast any stones. But thank God that is not my mind today. For the devil no longer has be captive.
But now I am seeing them everywhere… transgender people. And reading and hearing more and more about people ‘transitioning.’ Meaning slipping out of being 1 type of sexual being into another… as in going from being… or appearing to be male to appearing to be female via surgery, shots and medication etc.
For a while now I have been thinking about a friend of mine who recently was informed by her daughter to begin calling her ‘Harry’ or some nonsense… (I am kind of playing with the name here as I do not wish to disclose the real name). But yes, she has begun eating up all those pills and seeking to undergo the surgery.
I cannot think of anything more which resembles self-hate more to me than an act such as this. And the thing seems to have become more and more popular… and widespread among those in the gay community.
And that is what they say ‘I hated myself because I knew I was suppose to be a girl.’
You know what the devil is the great deceiver. All of my life until most recently I used to think of myself as being ugly. I really thought I was ugly and never like taking pictures. I didn’t want any mirrors in my room. I rarely looked at myself in the mirror. But you know what a few years ago I started thinking about something…
I have been stalked at least 5 times in my life if not more. And I started thinking about that.
I had had some very beautiful girlfriends… but none of them had ever been stalked. Or least ways not to my knowledge. So, I wondered 1 day ‘why me?’
It was not until I started trying to get a picture for the back cover of my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE, that I discovered something. And it came about shortly after I got saved… and came into the realization that God never created anything ugly.
So, now as I was looking for a picture for my book… I also began to see myself in a new and very different light. And in that light I realized that I had never ever been ugly.
I laugh at it now because for over 40 nearly 50 years I had felt that I was not attractive at all. I just never saw what I see now… and I have attached this picture of me so you can see too. Isn’t it funny. Stalked at least 5 times …and I mean seriously stalked. Once so bad I almost had a nervous breakdown because I became so terrified. And I have been stalked by men and women.
But once I came into the light… and the scales were removed from my eyes I began to see me that had always been there… but I had never seen before because… to me … in my eyes then I was ugly.
So, now you see me. And, of course, that is me below also. But when the devil has your mind …he can make you believe anything… even that you are man when you really are a woman. God does not make mistakes. But the devil does… and often. Don’t let him fool you too.
When my friend’s daughter… her other daughter called me up and told me the story about her decisions to become a man… my mind began to take a tumble. It is hard for me to wrap my mind around anyone wanting to destroy them-self in such a horrid way as this… as an act of trying to re-order their sexual gender would be doing. And all I could think of was the woman… really a man who tried to join Salsa-Soul Sisters. An act which met with such furry that the person was totally forced out of our group sessions and following that night stopped entirely coming to our Salsa-Soul Sisters meetings at all.
Those lesbians called an emergency meeting where immediately they voted in unanimously ‘that no person who is not born bio-logically a woman could ever be a board meeting of Salsa-Soul.’ And they meant every word of it.
And I mean they all rush into that meeting that night… for that emergency meeting. The only emergency meeting I think Salsa ever had. Sisters I hadn’t seen in years… some I even think got up out the grave to attend that meeting.
It was a pivotal point in Salsa-Soul Sisters history that night. I think in the lesbian world really… in how we all view some things… Salsa was a scared female only organization. So, a man… even 1 dressed up as a woman.. with boobs etc… Well, a thing like that was not acceptable to us… to none of us. And a man… going through a sex change to become a woman so he could be a lesbian… was not acceptable to those real 100% lesbian women who came into that meeting to voice their opinions on the matter… and it would never be and they made sure of that. Lease ways not as a board member of their prized and beloved organization… Salsa Soul Sister, Inc. And I have to say… I agreed.
But the odd point is this … as freaky as that whole thing was to me… and as it was to my fellow Salsa-Soul Sisters… I never saw where it might ever become a larger issue. A world issue… if you get my drift. As I now see it becoming.
This thing is large and it incorporates changing legal documents which are adjusted to the conform and affirm the status, name etc. of the said person. This includes drivers licenses and everything… which once read ‘male’ are now changed to read ‘female.’ And to me that is scary. Because these people move away from home where nobody knows them and present themselves to unsuspecting people as someone totally different from who they really were born to be… and they look many of them every bit the part of who they are trying to pretend to be… and sound like it too with the help of all of what they are taking by way of medication to assist in their incredible changes.
If questioned about it… saying that someone questioned if they were a man or a woman?
All they have to do is pull out this new false licenses, passports etc… listing their new names, social security numbers and sex on them. And who could argue that they were not who or what they claimed to be.
Today the amount of people opting to change their sex is staggering to me. It is like a fad with many people deciding to do it… like changing an old hat or pulling off an old tee shirt.
Whenever I am talking to the sister of the daughter who is going through this type of change… which is called ‘transitioning,’ I avoid speaking about her sister at all now. As the thing really is a bit too much for me… and I would rather not hear about it. But I understand that she has had her breast removed and her voice is changing. And ‘yes’ she is beginning to grown facial hair… so the process of looking more and more like the male species is well underway for her … as well as, sounding like 1.
The sister has told me that her mother and everybody else in the family is calling her ‘him’ now… and by his adaptive name… ‘Harry.’ Which really surprised me. Because I would not have believed that their mother would have fallen into that game… and it is a game. Really it is. And it is a game that I just cannot play… because it would be lying… and too accepting of your child going through that process.
If your child was a robber would you accept that?
I think not. Then why accept a change that is going to alter your child into someone or something you will no longer recognize …and living in such a diverse lifestyle that is bound to bring them nothing but unhappiness later on down the road… if not already And it will.
I hear that Chaz… Cher’s daughter has found that it may have been the wrong choice for her… in altering herself or attempting to alter herself into a man. Let’s face it… Chaz will always be known as Cher’s daughter whether they call her Chasity of not. We can all agree that she looks and sounds ever bit like a man. But at the end of the day she is just a woman who had a sex change. And THAT, my friend… really doesn’t add up to being a ‘real man.’
How could I go around calling someone ‘her’ or ‘she’ when I know that they are a ‘he or a her?’
And since I would rather not hurt their feelings it is best ‘we’ do not come together at all.
Now, I am not for disowning people. Or throwing away ones children. That would be down right wrong. But we cannot accept all kinds of junk either. A parent cannot discard their child… and should not. But this whole ‘I changing my sex thing’ certainly should not be forced down any parent’s throat either. That is the feeling I got about my friend’s daughter… she had no respect of what or how her parents felt about it. Or cared about how they felt about it. It was her way or no way. So, her mother conceded and began calling her daughter ‘he’ and ‘him’ … and whatever name she is calling herself.
I had lovers… a few of them even met my parents. But I was 1 of those people who was very discrete about my relationship with the women I went to bed with. I certainly never kissed or held their hands in the company of my parents… or out in mixed company anywhere. In fact, while in the company of my parents it never came to me to want to. Because… I guess I respected them too much to want to.
I have always maintained and still maintain… that my life is my life. I also felt that it was not necessary for me to go shouting through the streets or around world who I was sleeping with. And I have always maintained that I really did not care who other people were sleeping with as long as it was not involving children or animals. Outside of that… it really wasn’t any of my business.
Though I had a friend working at a radio station in New York and 1 evening I accompanied her to the radio station, and upon greeting someone she noted to me privately ‘that he likes young boys.’ She went on to say, ‘boys between 4 and 7.’ I never went back to the radio station with her after that… because all I could do was kind of stare at the guy and think that somebody should put him out of his misery. Such people have to be sad people to me.
How could you live with yourself doing such a thing?
I don’t know how she could work in a place like that… with someone like that. I could barely make it through the evening knowing what she had told me about him.
But how does anyone share information like that with anyone?
And how does anyone not report him?
And you would have had to have seen the guy… never would you have guessed it. Tall… muscular… good looking kind of guy… normal on the outside. But dark on the inside… filled with some deep dark secrets. It was written in his eyes… I think.
Why or how he managed to share them… that kind of information about himself and his sexual forays with my friend I do not know. But that was all she had to say to me to keep me away from that radio station ever again. But I have never forgotten him. Because there was something rather sad about him… as well. You cannot live like that… or that kind of life and not be sad. A very sad sad person.
But back to this transgender revolution that is exploding all over the place. It is sad to see how the world is going backwards. How twisted and turned around people are becoming. There is a lost of direction… and everything bad seems to be in. Or appears to be the latest thing to do. Even Bruce Jenner, step dad of the Kardashians and an Olympic champion, in his younger days… has gotten in on the transgender act. I is hard for me to see or understand why so many people are electing to do so… or are so guns-hoo for it. It boggles the mind.
And what is even more mind boggling to me… is the fact that many once they undergo their change now classify themselves as being ‘straight.’ Meaning they do not want to be classified as being gay or transgender etc… etc… at all. They think of themselves as being totally man or woman… not transformed being. This thing is crazy.
That is what I think about this whole new thing… crazy. This whole thriving world of transgender individuals…. people who think that it is ‘hip’ … I am dating myself here I know but I can’t think of another word that fits better than ‘they think it is ‘hip.’ ‘Hip’ to be an ‘it.’
I have seen them… seen pictures of them… and they seem to be happy outwardly…and loving who they are pretending to be. But I know that is a lie. You cannot be really happy or love anything …and be out so of alignment with God.
You did know this part was coming. Least ways I hope you did… because I could not leave this blog without bringing Him up. He does play a factor… a major factor in all of this. Especially since He created us all.
Oh, you can appear to be happy. But appearing to be happy and being happy are 2 totally different things.
What God has made us to be… that is what we are. And no doctor or amount of chemicals or operations can change it. Your DNA is your DNA and that is God’s doing. Everything else is meant to be confusion… strife… and deceitful.
Do not let the devil destroy you. And if your child is dealing with these issues remember you can’t change them… therapy can’t change them… but God can. He changes and mind and the heart… He changed mines. Just keep your children lifted up in prayer. Pray without ceasing and love on them …and let God do His perfect work in them.
My parents prayed for me. And you see me as I am today… God made a new creature out of me. And He didn’t need any medication or shots or surgery to do it.
One last thing before I get out of here…
This woman here and her daughter… turned male supposedly… are just looking for a reality show deal on the backs of this whole transgender mess. If they don’t already have 1. The thought of it makes me sick… because it puts out there this concept of changing your sexual identity is alright… that it is good… and okay… and above all… it can make you happy and ‘in.’ And so many many many people are just looking for anything that will make them ‘in’… they are looking for anything that make them more friends or gather them some attention. They are looking for their 15 minutes of fame and possible fortune.
And if you ask me this woman is definitely pimping her daughter… and the look of her daughter’s face…says she is loving every minute of it. It is all about money, baby
You do see what her cap says don’t you?
Or maybe they are both just pimping each other…
Well, God bless…. I have got to get started on something else before I get out of here. So, I have to end now. But you will not believe that I actually wrote this blog several weeks ago… and I am now just getting around to adding all the finishing touches to it today. Oh, well… Hope you enjoy your weekend and I truly do God will bless you and keep you well.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2014
When you watch this stuff it really really makes you scared for the world… and all its people. It is frightening times because the devil is taking the minds… hearts… and bodies of our children. And some parents are aiding in that process.
This stuff is sick… and very distressing… Perilous times…. II Timothy 3:1…
UPDATE: Wednesday, July 10, 2014….Okay, I’ve just finished watching the graduation speech to the college in the video above by the (I hate to say ‘he-she’ above)… but you know what?
I think whoever termed that phrase got it right. And for a truth they were way ahead of their time when they first started saying it.
Times have gone crazy. Why would you invite a transsexual to be your graduating class main speaker?
Alright, maybe I could see it if the person had done some type of fantastic or earth scattering deed… discovered something (other than he wanted to be a woman and was now pretending to be one). But all this guy does is pull at his very bad weave and talk about himself. I must admit that I have known more than my share of drag queens who loved to do the very same. But nobody paid them ‘x’ amount of dollars or extended an invitation to them to come and be the guest speaker of their class graduation at some college.
I must be missing something. And I am not trying to be funny… but I kind of liked it when we celebrated people for ‘really’ achieving something other than cutting off their penises… or attempting to grow 1. This is sick…truly.
And I know somebody is not going to like it. They will call me homophobic and everything else. And I can live with that.
But what I cannot live with… is me sitting around and being quiet as I watch this world sink into holes it will never ever be able to pull itself out of again. Pandora’s box is open…
One thing about everything when you are growing up. Everything is a joke to you… until it isn’t a joke. Don’t be caught unawares…
Add a comment June 20, 2014
His name is B. Scott and he classifies himself as being androgynous… kind like what Michael wanted to be… somewhere between being male and female.
I have seen few people who have pretended to be as happy as B. Scott pretends like he is. When I was in ‘the life’ I thought I was happy too. But I never pretended like I was over joyed with it. Over a period of time I just came to accept it… which I guess if you finally settle upon ‘this is who I am’ you tend to do. You just start to kind of accept it. Which is what B. Scott said he finally came to do.
Though I have seen thousands of gay guys and women who acted like they were super dupper happy being gay. I had also seen them …many of them in the tears because they wished they could be like everyone else.
When I watched this video on YouTube by B. Scott… the 1 below… it really prompted me to write this blog. Because there were a few things that he said that really gave me insight as to who he is… and why.
(I’ve got to find the right video) But in the YouTube video B. tells of how people used to say to him when he was a little boy, ‘You so pretty you should have been born a girl.’
In hearing that it made me think of my son, who at the age of 13… 1 day broke down and started crying saying to me that I would never be a grandmother. Then he said that he must be ‘gay’ because everyone told he that.
How could I defeat what he was saying?
At the time I was not saved. I was speechless and did not know what to say. I was shocked.
I must confess to being 1 of those gay mothers who was seriously homophobic… terribly. But I never pushed my thoughts nor my fears over onto my son. Well, I hope not… certainly never intentionally. But there was a period in my life when he could nothing right. I hollered at him about everything. I did not realize that I was doing that though until a woman who was part of my film shoot on my short film… a niece to Florida of ‘Good Times’… pointed it out to me and talked to me about it. She said, ‘Why are you always yelling at him?’
I never realized that I did. But I am glad she brought it to my attention. I might have drove my son away… but thank God that did not happened. That big headed boy took me out to dinner last night… to very expensive sea food restaurant that we both like. But I do not love him because he treats me to thing… or buys me stuff… I love him because he is ‘my son.’ And I thank God for him.
I had never heard anyone call him that… that word… ‘gay.’ Though I think they were careful not to do so while I was around… as I would not have liked it. Though I must say that at an early age I started to feel like I was seeing certain signs of it. But here is where I want to tell you how the devil works.
You are not seeing anything that the devil has not put in your mind. Your young children know nothing about sex… but the devil will toy with your brain and make you believe you are seeing things which are not there.
You don’t believe me????
Let me share with you this. One night while in my apartment in downtown Brooklyn…. as I was leaving the living room to go towards my bedroom I looked down at the floor. Upon looking down I saw the floor was covered with large water bugs everywhere. I mean swarming with them everywhere. I quickly looked up and said to myself, ‘the devil is a liar.’
I don’t know where that came from… but that is what I said. Then I looked back down at the floor and there were no water bugs anywhere. It had all been a figment of my imagination… brought about from the devil knowing that I had a fear of those things. Which came about by the fact that occasionally I would see a water bug in my apartment… something that my landlord refused to believe.
But that night the devil had decided that he was going to drive me mad… meaning crazy by presenting to me a ton of those horrible things crawling all over my apartment floor around me… and they covered my entire apartment floor. But I did not go crazy. God kept my mind… because He did not let me fall for it. I merely shut my eyes for whatever reason… (as I did not know it was God’s doing at the time)… I just started believing that they were not there. You would have had to seen them. They were so real.
This is how I know that people can see things… which look as real as anything you can touch or feel… and it not really be there. It was just something that the devil presented to me… and had made it appear real to me because he knew I was afraid of those things. Of which New York seems to me have quite a few of them.
The woman in the above link killed her 4 year old son because she believed he was gay. The devil truly had her mind that she would have done such an insane thing. But he does and can plants seeds in your head… and make you see and hear things which are not really there. And if you are not careful… and you let them take root in you… you will believe what the devil has planted and will act out in whatever way he wants you to.
What does having a jump rope in your hand have to do with being gay?
So, what if a little boy wants to jump rope. It does not mean he wants to grow long hair and become a girl.
But my friend did not realize that she was planting seeds… that 1 day would grown into just what she was asking for.
I had wanted to badly to tell her that what she and other members in her family were doing to him in regards to calling her grandson a ‘girl’… or saying to him had some ‘girl in him’ was wrong. But I knew they would not listen to me… so I did not. But now in hindsight I realized I should have tried …if for no other reason other than for her grandson’s sake.
We must speak LIFE to your children. And do not let anyone speak DEATH to them… not even in joking. Calling your boy child a girl is speaking death to him… or your girl child a boy. Don’t do it. Encourage them to have fun… let them enjoy themselves as children without you putting all your own sexual hangups upon them.
So, when I watched and listened to the above video of B. Scott I realized just how he had come to be and why. I understand him… not so much because of what my son had said to me. But because I understand how little children can become confused as to who they are if people keep pushing them in some other direction by saying ignorant things to them that makes them believe what people are saying about them. And I guess that does kind of fit directly with what my son had said to me.
My entrance into ‘the life’ was very different… it had nothing to do with anyone calling me a ‘boy.’ Because frankly I never looked like 1… nor did I ever want to be 1. Though I wasn’t much of a baby doll playing little girl either. I don’t think I tried climbing trees… but I did try my hand at trying to fix a couple of things when I was young.
But being the oldest my youth was superseded by my having to learn how to do things at an early age… like washing dishes. I do not know how old I was when my father pushed a chair up to the kitchen sink… but that was the beginning of my years of me being our family dishwasher. Then I was taught how to cook… and the list goes on and on…
I was introduced to sex at a very early age. Not via any family members but outside of our home. Only twice had it happened. But it happened before I had a voice or knew I had a voice or any idea of what was happening. That is not to say I was an infant. I was just a very young innocent child of maybe 6…7… or 8. And the 2 times it happened they happened at varying times… not close or together. Maybe a year or so apart… can’t remember that part.
I made mention on 1 of the times in 1 of my other blogs not so long ago. It was a time that I almost got gang raped… but God said ‘no.’ That was the first time that someone took advantage of me. But those 2 experiences marked my life forever… and how I think and feel about people who take advantage or abuse children.
But contrary to what many people may say or think… sexual preference many times may not have anything to do with what you were indoctrinated to… or let me say it this way first introduced to sexually.
Though I have spoken to many gay guys and they had the opposite experience… and some women too. It did lead them into a life of homosexuality. And a lot of times it happened to them with someone who took advantage of them sitting in some position in the church… lived in their apartment building… was a close friend to their mother or father… and ‘yes’ even sometimes it was a relative… or a daughter or a son of the 1 their parent’s friend. One of my times was such a case as that. My mother must have known… as she never went to visit that friend ever again.
But going back to this guy B. Scott in watching his videos I felt sorry for him… because I understood him in ways that many people will never get to. And I also recognized his gaiety… or supposed happiness… really to be his sadness.
Love you, B. Scott. And hoping that 1 day God will do a work in your life like he did in mine. I hope the same for my son…. and the many sons and daughters dealing with identity problems… issues… or sexual confusion.
And I hope your laughter and smiles will become ‘real’… and turn into a joy that surpasses all understanding 1 day.
And that 1 day you will look into a mirror and see how really handsome you are… and start loving the ‘real’ you’ and not that the ones who were agents of devil told you were… but who God really made you to be.
Well, God bless…. I am really supposed to be doing something else right now. But I just wanted to take the time to do this blog really quickly. I hope that it falls upon fertile ground…
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2014
2 comments April 17, 2014
But as I looked at her face it seemed to tell a story… of much sadness… weariness… and age. She looked tired and older that her physical years… like an old woman. A young face but so old.
I think what impacted me ever so much about this story is the fact that she was homeless with her mother… and I guess other siblings… living in a shelter.
Living in a shelter???
Little children living in a shelter???
It is not that I am naive. Because many years ago as I happened to be crossing a busy Manhattan street down near Macy’s… walking towards me was a woman pushing a baby carriage and a couple of other children along side of her. But from the moment my eyes fell upon them walking towards me… as we were both going in opposite directions…. I could tell that that woman was homeless and her children too. So, I have seen it… though you don’t often hear about it. It is something that is hard not to notice when you see it.
I do not think that little children should be allowed to live in shelters… no matter what. It is 1 thing for parents to have to go. But I do not think children should be made to suffer that kind of experience when they had nothing to do with whatever circumstance fell upon their parent and/or parents. Though some might argue that it is because of their children that they are in the state that they are in. But children do not bring about poverty. It is brought about by people who are not prepared to deal responsibly with their charge of caring for themselves. Part of taking care of ourselves is also being able to take care of our children decently. This is why we have be educated… work… and endeavor to provide even when times get hard.
Perhaps, I am not realistic. I am not talking about pulling up your own bootstraps. I’m talking about adulthood takes preparation and serious determination for a successful life. And we can do that only by advancing ourselves… studying… improving our skills… get into training positions… and endeavoring to move up.
The 1 thing I can still foremost remember about parents of old… they almost all wanted their children to have better lives than they did. So, they worked to make that happened. They struggled to make that happened. They saved to make that happened. But there is a new parent of so-called parents… and everything appears to be more and more about them.
So, many of these young girls have killed off their children or attempted to kill off their children for the sank of some love interest… or because they were tired of being tied to their children… or whatever other excuse they may have had. These people are having children without any paternal instinct in them at all. I am not necessarily talking about Relisha’s mother… because I do not know her… nor do I know the situation that drove her to seek shelter with her children in a shelter.
Based upon the article a janitor working at the shelter where this little girl, Relisha Rudd, lived with her mother… a place where they have been living for the past 3 years. The janitor befriended the mother who allowed him to take her daughter off… away from the shelter (on perhaps more than 1 occasion).
That was more than 3 weeks ago now… Relisha was never returned to the shelter… and it has since been discovered that the janitor killed his wife. And then later somewhere… or where he killed his wife… he took his own life.
And the story kind of ends there… except for the fact that they are searching for Relisha.
The police are out searching for her the little 8 year older who was allowed by her mother to go off with 1 of the shelter janitors. A 2nd grader who lived in an old Washington, DC deserted hospital turned into a shelter for families. A news article said… ‘place said to be filled with bedbugs and no playground.’ It probably smelled… and an overall feeling of complete destitution abounded there.
I cannot imagine what it is like to be forced to go live in a shelter. It seems to be the last resort for those forced in that situation… next to just plain living on the street. And many people chose living on the streets if they can… because I have heard them say that the shelters were not safe.
I don’t know this child’s mother. But as a mother I would not ever have allowed my daughter big or small to go off with some man. Sometimes when we sit in situations of desperation we might do anything… that under ordinary circumstances we might not allow. I have no idea what could have been going through this mother’s mind. The first thought that would have come to me… was ‘why was this person so interested in my daughter?’
There are mothers who will turn their children over to people… because they have an interest in that person. And the person’s interest in their child gets them attention from that person… because of their interest in the child.
I once knew a mother who used her children like that. Not being worldly I really didn’t really know what was going on at the time… it is over a period of years that I now realize what I had been seeing.
This woman had a very attractive young daughter who she used to take to the club with her… a lesbian hang out. An older lesbian woman… much older lesbian woman became interested in the woman’s daughter… who at the time may have been 12 or 14. I am not sure as I did not know the family at the time. I can only bear witness to what I saw when I came to meet them.
The older woman was about in her 40’s … approaching 50 at the time she took up becoming involved with the woman’s daughter. This meant obviously perks for the mother and the daughter. At some point the young girl started living with the older woman… I met the daughter when she had moved back into her mother’s house… by this time the girl had developed her own mind and didn’t just want the older woman but wanted to play around with other woman… young girls etc. She was exceedingly pretty… and knew it… everybody was chasing her. The old woman truly cared for her and bought her everything the young girl wanted… clothes and everything she owned… even after the young girl moved out and went back to her mother’s house. And that young girl was very well dressed from head to toe.
When I met them their lives were different from what I was accustom to. The mother’s house seemed like Madison Square Garden to me… or Penn Station. People were coming and going from the mother’s house all night long. It was like the local drop in center. It was not until later that I noticed 1 of the younger sons answering the door… which usually was unlocked and people just walked in. But the young boy sold the person some drugs. I was taken aback by it. I had never seen such a thing before… and a young kid doing it. He was probably all of 9 or 10 at the time.
I was clearly out of my element at the time… way out of it. But going back to the young girl who at the time I met her… I thought she was 17 or 18… later I came to find out she was only 15. But thing was when you entered her mother’s house and then stepped into her room it was like stepping into another world. Her room was like night and day to her mother’s house… because of how that older woman cared for her… by that I mean ‘took care of her.’ She had everything in her room… she never had to leave it. She had a refrigerator… and I don’t know what else now. Can’t remember… all I remember is the shocked I had when I stepped in the young girl’s room in her mother’s house.
I had seen nothing like it. She was well taken care of by the older woman… who obviously was so attached to her that she did not mind sharing her with other people… if that was the only way she could keep her. It was wired… but the young girl was not the only child of the mother that the mother let people take and do what they wanted. She had a son… I could tell that the young boy… younger than his sister was obviously gay. But the mother had a border living in her house. And the 1 time that I visited their home the young boy and the young man who boarded their were having an argument and sounded like husband and wife.
I never went back to that woman’s house again it was too weird for me. But I felt sorry for her children… all of them. So, I would take them out trying to expose them to things that most little children usually do. I drove them 1 day to the beach… can’t think of what else it has been so long. But I cannot rationalize how any mother could exploit her children as that woman. The girl’s mother liked me which is why she invited me to her house. But their way of living was so foreign to me that I rarely ever went back to that house. Mother knew that my eye was on her daughter which is why she invited to their house… but when I found out her daughter’s real age… there was a boundary that I could not cross and didn’t. But I got to see a side of life I might not have ever otherwise… a dark side… a side where anything goes… and everything is alright if you show me some attention too. That I think is how that young girl’s mother thought.
I do know that being homeless works on many people mind… and they become unglued. They loose it mentally. One can hardly blame them as the burden of homelessness must be so great… that it could tear most of us to pieces just thinking about it.
When I think of homelessness I often think of the lady who I used to pass everyday when I walked through the tunnel from the World Trade Center to the subway train going home or heading to someplace in Manhattan or going to Jersey.
She sat quietly on a large run to the left side of the wall between the Path and the ‘A’ train. I have always wondered whether or not she made it out on the day that the airplanes flew into the Twin Towers of the World Trade Center, on 9/11. But much like this young girl, Relisha… memories of that woman many times haunted me. I often wondered if there was something that I could do for her?
How the elderly woman became homeless I do not know. She appeared to be very proud. I once stopped to offer some food and she became very angry at me telling me she did not want it. And she meant it… as she became very angry and I realized then that I had offended her by offering my food to her.
There is so much happening to young children today. Every time you finish reading 1 story that is haunting and detestable to you… there pops up another even worst.
The story was sad enough just reading that she… this beautiful little child was living in a shelter.
I cannot imagine how many other children are living in shelters around this country or in this world.
Sometimes we get so caught up in the joys of our own lives… that we totally forget or are obvious to all the sadness that is in this world. And there is much sadness in this world… whether it touches us personally or not. But we should all be touched …or moved by it to try to help or make a difference in the lives of others less fortunate than we… somehow….
Just saw while looking info on this story that Mickey Rooney has passed. There was hardly a Saturday afternoon that Mickey was not in some movie on our television. I guess I could call him 1 of Saturday friends… just like Shirley (Temple) and Tarzan….
Mickey was 93….
Since writing what I did above about Relisha Rudd the 8 year missing in Washington, DC… and though no one is saying it… thought to be dead… as they have on camera Relisha’s kidnapper purchasing large trash bags and buying lye. Meaning he… if he did… killed her put her body into a trash bag and buried her pouring the lye all over her body to dissolve her away. My, Lord…
I watched the video below where the mother speaks… and truthfully speaking you can tell the mother has problems. She appears to be slow… if you know what that means. She says she allowed the man… the kidnapped to take her because he did not seem to be the type of person who would do anything like that. Many times it is exactly the people who appear ‘not’ to be ‘the type’... who are ‘the type.’ It is part of what gives them the thrill of doing whatever evil they do… because they know no one would believe ‘they would do something like that.’ I have never once heard a news items where someone was discovered committing heinous crimes or mass whatever’s where no one said ‘he just didn’t seem like that kind of guy.’
I would have to believe that this man may have had an obsession for little girls. Many men do. R. Kelly is not the only 1… or all by himself. One thing that has aided in this kind of thing is the law becoming extremely lax when it comes to filing cases against men or boys… teenage or otherwise… who indulge in having sex with under age young girls.
Once I read a news article about a little 12 year old girl who had to be separated from her 17 year old brother. The 12 year old was pregnant by him… and she was head over heels in love with her brother who obviously had been having sexual relations with his little sister for many years. The young girl was so attached to him sexually that they had to remove her from him via court order for them to stay away from each other. At 12 and having grown up being abused by her brother… I doubt that the young girl really understood the breath or the width of that order… or why it was being enacted.
They say the eyes are the window to the soul. When I first looked upon this young girl’s picture all I really noticed were her eyes… and the sadness within them. She looked old… worn… and had traveled many miles….
I posted a picture of her on my Facebook page and here is 1 of the comments I got concerning it… or this story…
We must work to save the children… from despair… from homelessness… from abuse… from people who really can’t care for them or protect them properly…
Well, God bless…. its getting late and I am getting hungry. I’m supposed to be working on another project for client. And here I am writing this… but it was on my mind. Enjoy your day and the rest of this week… and I think Spring is really in the air this time.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2014
Add a comment April 8, 2014
When I first got wind of this story it was while watching some camera man or woman poke a microphone in front of Jesse Jackson, Sr., his father. They were asking him about something or other and then shifted the questioning to his son. Jesse Jr. Jesse senior kind of smirked and said that his son was now doing much better following his rehab.
Hearing the word ‘rehab‘ I immediately believed that Jackson’s son had been in some type of auto accident or something. And that the reason his father was smirking was because his son was pulling through his injuries with flying colors.
But I Googled the story on Jesse junior and was very surprised. He had always looked so clean cut… spoke with such intelligence. Who would have thought that he would have become involved in drugs… much less had become an addict?
It appears that they were trying to say that it all came about due to Jesse junior falling prey to pain pills. ‘They’ being the Jackson family. But for some reason it all seemed a bit deeper than that.
In my continuing to Google more information on the story I noticed the tremendous amount of weight that Jesse junior had put on during the time since last I had seen him… it seemed to me overnight.
The Bible says that what is done in the dark comes to light… and I believe that this is the case in this story.
Now, I am not 1 for throwing stones. Goodness, no. I don’t want to do that. But as I was saying to a friend earlier today… this morning to be exact… as we were speaking on this story…
“Most people do not just start taking drugs later on in life.”
And they don’t.
They either got started in college or were doing it earlier somewhere during their growing up period. But they do not just get up and start sniffing coke or shooting up crack unless they have a history of drugs somewhere in their life.
So, I’m thinking that all those years… which really weren’t that many… since I first became award of Jesse Jackson, Jr…. who was not involved in politics until years after I left Chicago. But during the brief time that I knew of him or had seen him on TV… he appeared to be so handsome… articulate… and very clean cut. But underneath he had to had some deep dark demons … and those demons had to have been the cause of his living a double life.
Contrary to most beliefs there tons of people who live and work daily functioning on very high levels having some type of addiction. It many times is really not a very hard thing to do. We pay so little attention to the people around us really.
Many more people are functioning alcoholics or drug addicts than you may believe. The same way many people are functioning illiterates… or whatever else people may be trying to hide about themselves from others. They can function and work right beside you and you would never know anything was out of whack about them… or with them.
I once had a young lady who worked under me. She was promoted to an assistant managerial position before I began to notice anything… and it took a while for me to grab a hold of it. I had forgotten our many conversations… conversations that the young lady and I had shared together, as I was an immediate supervisor to her. But we were friendly with each other.
The conversations we had had were about her being in college… that alone would have been more than enough reason for me to never believe that she was a functioning illiterate. She spoke about going to college and having to take these ‘remedial’ classes. I actually had no clue as to what ‘remedial‘ classes were… but over a course of time while working with her… in her new capacity I came to find out.
In New York City they have this thing called ‘social promotions.’ It is when they promote students to the next level or grade not based upon what they have learned, or having successfully fulfilled their studies… but because of their age. And that young lady had been 1 of the unfortunate students who had suffered such a thing as that.
The young lady… she could not read. Something I had never gathered in all my conversations with her… and certainly during any of the time she worked directly under me. Basically because I just never had to have her read anything. And I guess if she needed to read something… a notification or company document or something… she found someone who read it for her.
So, it was not until the young lady was promoted to assistant manager where reading became crucial… and something that she definitely had to do in order to fulfill the job and on a regular daily basis. But the young lady was coy… she knew how to camouflage her handicap. As a supervisor she had people working under her, so she merely passed on the written material to 1 of them telling them to read it aloud… while she pretended to be busy doing something else.
I never found out that the young lady could not read until a worker under her came to me and told me. I had never noticed it… never guessed it… and it certainly had never been evident to me or any of the other senior managers on that job. But I never disclosed her secret… and she continued to functioned on her job without anyone being any the wiser except the 1 person she used to read company documents to her, who later herself was promoted.
So, yes alcoholics and people on drugs or those with any other kind of diversity can function normally and quite well without those around them being any the wiser. Unless, they start exhibiting signs of a problem. Which does oftentimes start happening with some people. Things like a slurring of words, staggering… missing work… having to leave work early… appearing un-kept or unshaven… clothes unclean or smelly… not showing up for appointments… being giggly or overly loud… changes in attitude… mood swings etc… can all be signs that there is a problem.
So, whether I saw it or not I am sure that there were some around him who did. Who saw that Jesse junior was on his way down.
When I first read the story I must say that it reminded of the Marion Berry story. The ex-Mayor of Washington, D.C. who was caught in a hotel room shooting up crack. A similar kind of story about a politician going down due to drugs.
In mentioning that story to my friend, who had called me on the Jesse junior story… we both had to agree that Marion Berry did not just being using drugs after he became the Mayor. No, he probably had to have had a drug problem from before that even came about, but it was on the down-low… meaning few if anybody politically connected to him knew about it.
Busted and publicly outed as a drug user Marion was yet voted back in as Mayor. And I guess Jesse junior believed that the same thing could happen for him.
But it did not. Though Jesse junior did not remove his name from the 2012 ballot for re-election… he found out that his constituents thought differently from those who voted Marion Berry back into office after having been convicted for drug use.
Recently… like just yesterday… an Illinois Judge handed Jesse Jackson, Jr. a 30 month prison conviction, and gave his wife a 12 month sentence for misappropriation of election funds from her own campaign money in her bid for State Alderman.
It appears that my friend who called me on the story followed the Jackson story a lot closer than I did. She commenced to tell me that Jesse junior and his wife were involved not only in drugs, and mis-usage of campaign funds to the tune of over $750,000… but also indulged in 3-somes… and had done a lot of foolish lavish spending which ultimately lead to their downfall… and their getting caught.
It is a shame how we vote these people into public offices believing that they are going to do and represent us in honor and with integrity. That they will be diligent in their labors and pursuits for us, as our representatives in government. And they go off and make a fool of themselves… and oftentimes of us too.
I happened to come across a YouTube video of Bishop Paul Morton announcing that he will be turning over the reigns of the leadership of the Full Gospel Fellowship to Bishop Joseph Walker, Mt. Zion Baptist Church, Nashville, TN. I need not tell you that I was taken aback by the announcement. Well, for a few reasons…
- I wasn’t ready for it.
- It shocked me.
- I never realized that Bishop Morton would retire.
And it must have been a shock to more than just me based upon the body language… and those who applauded the announcement… versus those who did not… of those standing behind Bishop Morton at the time he made that announcement.
But with all of that being said… I must say that through the years I have caught the broadcast of the Bishop Walker… and remember that not too long ago his first wife passed and after some time he later remarried. Beyond that I have nothing to say about him… because I know nothing else of him.
But I do wonder how this will play itself out amongst the inner circle of the current leadership of Full Gospel?
Usually the second or the third in command becomes the new head. So, I am sure this was a big surprise all the way around.
This was a decision made by Bishop Morton… and the Full Gospel Fellowship organization being his baby… as he organized it and gave it birth to it… he has the right to do as he wishes. I must say I thought it brave of him. I do believe that it is better to have people already in place for the sake of the organization or church so that the flow of the organization is not thrown into an upheaval when the leader passes or some other drastic change comes about suddenly.
Having, however, made such a decision will lead to challenges. There undoubtedly will be some fallout. Everybody is not going to be satisfied. Feelings were hurt and feathers ruffled… and there just is no getting around that when large and important decisions are made. And especially if something goes to someone that no one may have thought it would… for whatever reason.
Through the course of time the Full Gospel Fellowship has lost some dynamic preachers. People who went on to create their own fellowships and supposed religious dynasty’s… or desired to. Some of whom press has not been so kind to lately due to certain events either concerning themselves or their churches… such as Bishop Eddie Long and Bishop Larry Trotter. And if human nature has anything to do with it some others will probably be making an exit from Full Gospel, of this I am sure.
But I hope Bishop Walker well… and the entire congregation of Full Gospel delegates. I would believe that Bishop Morton did not create something only to 20 years later destroy it with his own 2 hands.
But there may well be some skeletons in Bishop Walkers closet. In March of last year at least 4 women filed suit against Bishop Walker and others affiliated with his mega church for the sum of $5 million… for alleged sexual harassment, aggravated sexual battery, sexual exploitation etc…
In light of this 1 has to wonder how such an appointment could have possible come about… until at least all these allegations have been dealt with… and Bishop Walker cleared of any wrong doing?
It is certainly stated in the Bible that a Bishop should be a man without blame… and a number of other things.
And as the leader of his own mega church… if Bishop Walker had not been personally involved in any wrong doings that took place at his church… just what does this, however, say about his leadership ability?
It is so odd that I should hit upon this. Because believe me leadership is not what it used to be… either on the job… or at church. And it is a shame.
Only time will tell what is going to be the amount of fallout …or disenchantment due to come about from Bishop Morton’s announcement to step down, and loosing the reigns of his leadership over the Full Gospel Fellowship.
Well, God bless… It’s Thursday and I am just trying to be as productive as I possibly can before the end of the weekend… where I just like to relax. Hope you get in some relaxation this weekend too. And the weather has been great.
I was out on the road last weekend. I love to drive. It frees my head and I enjoy in taking in the beauty of God everywhere I look. It’s free and you should enjoy it too…
How in the world would anyone even consider voting in that sexual pervert, Weiner… into any office ever again.
The mere fact that the man would ever consider EVER running for public office EVER AGAIN has got to be a joke… much less the Mayor of New York City.
It is quite obvious that the man has a massive problem… both psychological and sexual.
Was it not enough that during the time of his wife’s pregnancy he was having it out over his cell with some woman sexually, and sending her all kinds of nasty pictures of himself. Now, to be at again… and supposedly running for office too?
I would believe if he is that sick to be doing all this virtual stuff on-line with his lower part… then he probably is out and about dipping and dappling into the real thing too.
You have got to be kidding me. The man has no shame. And certainly no type of consideration for his family.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2013
Add a comment August 16, 2013
I am not liberal in my thoughts concerning people who violate children. I have no tolerance for them whatsoever. And this particular news item only heightens my disdain.
This particular person is a man… if you care to call him that… a father, if you care to even half way call him that… who lives in Patterson, New Jersey. He at some point was very involved with the group that Lauren Hill emerged from, the Fugees. He was said to have been the music video producer of 1 on their videos, Killing Me Softly.
But here is the story in a nutshell as I read it. The man’s 12 year old daughter pops up pregnant. And I guess the mother was questioning the child.
He said, “I think the baby is mine.”
It is not amazing to me how bad you begin to look when you begin to do the unthinkable. How 1 lives with themselves knowing that they have gone into forbidden territory is beyond me. There is no way this person could have thought that what he was doing was right. Because for 1 thing he kept it hid for years while making 1 daughter after another… then again and and again… pregnant.
“I think the baby is mine.”
I recall thinking this sometime after my son was born… ‘that if anyone touched him,… my son… I would go to prison. And I meant it.
So, then I have to wonder about this mother?????????
The woman has 5 daughters with her husband… this man… again if you want to call him that… who had been a music video director for a video of the Fugees. Now, 3 of this woman’s older daughters had turned up pregnant… giving them 6 grand-children. For him they would be 6 grand, and 6 more daughters for him… since all the babies were his which he had with his daughters… and their mothers, whom his wife, their mother gave birth to.
How does this happen?
I guess after making that confession his conscious must have started in on him… though he really couldn’t have had much of 1 to have done what he has done. But he told the woman, his wife… the girl’s mother… the 12 year old’s mother… the same mother of his other daughters, whom he had babies by already… that he had also begun working on their 4th daughter too. A little 8-year-old girl… whom he claims to only have performed oral sex on.
Okay, if you want to believe that. But a man without boundaries… has no boundaries. So, I doubt that ‘only oral sex’ thang. Even THAT was 1 step far too much for someone who was supposed to protect his children… not abuse them.
And these are black folk.
Truly, a demonic spirit and/or spirits were working in that house. And a corrupt mind to perpetrate it all.
So, he thought he was Abraham?
Only, Abraham did not mess sexually with his own children. Nor did Abraham deal in incest. He sent a servant to his wife’s family house to seek a wife for his son, Issac. Which in those times was a traditional thing to so.
God help those children… all of them.
Well, God bless… I cannot imagine being 12 with my stomach pushed out… having to go to school… and this story comes out. Everybody in Patterson is going to know this story. All her little friends… her friends parents… her teachers. And this is what this man was doing in his house to his children.
He was breeding them. Like some kind of animals. My Lord… help mankind, Lord God… Please… please… please. Save us from ourselves…
This story is as bad as the father of the DeBarge family. The only difference is we never found out until they were grown people. But their adult lives were as much a wreck trying to cope with it, as their haunted childhoods. And these stories are not rare as I am beginning to find out just by looking up this story. Click the links below… it proves it.
Then there was that man in Austria. He kept his daughter locked in some hole down in his basement for 20 years… impregnating her with 9 children.
It is unbearable… Madness… Truly…
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2013
6 comments July 29, 2013
Well, since it is Black History Month maybe now would be a good time to post this blog which I started in 2009 but never, for some reason or other never came back to. Can’t remember what prompted me to begin it in the first place. Though I must say along with Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Coretta Scott King, Bernice Reagan, Merle Evers, Harriette Tubman, Sojourna Truth, my Mother, Grand-mothers, Great Grand-mother, Mrs. Parks, as in Rosa… and half a dozen others… if not more women I have always admired… I celebrate them all. And if I keep thinking I am sure that I can come up with a few more… like O. J. Simpson’s first wife.
You may asked why I have O. J.’s first ex-wife on my list… it is simply that I admired her for taking the high road in all that mess. Out of all of O. J.’s supposed friends and colleagues… judges and lawyers everybody went for the money. They sold O. J. out every which way they could sell him. That is to say everybody except for his first wife. She never took 1 dime or ever came out against him. Never wrote a book… never signed a book deal… and she denied almost every offer for an interview. Though I am sure that she could have had a lot to say… but she chose the high road… the side of ‘to do him no harm.’
So, women like that… or people like that I can admire without any level of hesitation. Because most people today will sell you down the river for a dime… a promotion… or whatever else is up for grabs. And I am not being cynical.
Relationships… family bonds… friendships… you name it and they can all be tossed to the wind if somebody comes in with the right price. And sometimes that prices doesn’t even necessarily have to even be actual money. It can be a position… a title… an automobile… property… status… and phoney friendship… whatever the other side is in need of or looking for.
This is one of biggest and most saddest things about the world and people who live in it today. Had Jesus still been alive today he might have had to worry about more than 1 Judas… but maybe 6… 8 or 11 of them.
Everybody loves you while there is something to be gained in their association of you. In the Bible it appears that Job was a very popular man until he lost everything including his health. So, I guess it can be said that people have been the same throughout history. Was it not Caesar who said ‘et tu, Butus?’
It was not a secret that Malcolm X was the Honorable Elijah Muhammad, the founder and religious leader of the National of Islam, right-hand-man and 2nd in command. In fact, Malcolm had become the front man for the organization… he was the voice and the face of the organization at that time.
Malcolm X, Malcolm Little the name given to him by his mother, was such an eloquent speaker and possessed such great charisma that the Nation of Islam grew greatly under him. A thing that I am sure was celebrated in the beginning of their relationship between him and Mr. Muhammad… but later it became a source of contention between the 2 …as Mr. Muhammad saw Malcolm X’s power and authority growing among the ranks of the followers in his organization.
And then Malcolm went to Mecca and everything really changed between them. When I was in high school I recall buying a book called the “Autobiography of Malcolm X” …that book really intrigued me. I had not known anything about him until I read that book.
I guess I should invest more time in reading about our historical icons… and those who are little known. Their contributions were great and should not be overlooked… while we make millionaires of only writers of fiction.
I really cannot remember what prompted me to begin this blog… or why I entitled it ‘Bettye & Malcolm X?’
But there had to have been a reason. But since really I cannot at this time remember the reason… I have decided to just go ahead and post this blog anyway as a tribute to Black History Month 2013… I hope you enjoy it.
I celebrate all the heroic women and men who make up our history. Who endured, sacrificed… bleed… were spat upon… whooped… beat… stomped… dogs sicked upon… hit with forceful waters from water hydrants… who were made widowed or orphan… chained… tarred and feathered… and those who died. I celebrated them all… including those who felt it worthy to die over just being called a belittling word that started with that letter ‘N’ … that I might walk and sit… and eat and sleep… and live… and go to school etc… where I want to.
I will not forget… nor can I ever repay the debt by which they have endowed me… my family… my son… my nieces and nephews… our families… our history and our legacy for generations to come. Providing us with much pride… dignity… courage that must be passed on to all our children.
It is Black History Month… and I am happy to celebrate all of our she-ro’s and hero’s… and there are many many many many of them. And I thank God for each and every one of them.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2013
2 comments March 1, 2013
I often check my blog to see exactly what people are referencing my blog to read. It often signifies a hot topic or that some event has just happened. And so was the case this morning when I logged in to check my blog and happened to noticed that I had gotten a lot of hits concerning Bishop Larry Trotter, of Chicago, IL., and a little girl… supposedly a 4-year-old grand-daughter of his in the bathtub together.
Immediately, I Googled the story and lo and behold there it was a picture of Bishop Trotter, and what is reported to be 1 of his young grand-daughters… and both appear naked in the bathtub together.
All I can say is who takes a bath with their children?
Or their grand-daughter????
I remember my father in the bathroom… there were times that we would pass the bathroom and would see that he was shaving or brushing his teeth, but by the time he was taking off any clothes we never saw him. There were times when he got into the shower and needed something and called for 1 of us… but he was always safely in the shower careful to keep himself out of our view.
For that matter my mother was pretty much the same. We never saw her in the tub or in the shower either.
Years later, however, while growing up we… me and my sisters from time to time had gotten dressed in the same room or area as our mother when we had to… you know like while visiting a relative’s house or in some hotel etc. But outside of that no.
During a radio interview Bishop Trotter attempted to explain away the incident. But Bishop Trotter stated that he saw nothing wrong in getting into the tub with his very young grand-daughter. And he added that he had gotten into the tub with all of his children.
In that interview also, Bishop Trotter recalls his growing up, when he and his sisters and brothers bathed together. I would believe that most people who have or have had siblings may have also experienced this. But beyond a point it ceased to happen. None of us went into adulthood… or grew up as teenagers jumping in and out of a bathtub or shower with his or her sister and/or brother. That is to say… not unless something was going on. And I never grew up in that kind of family where those type of things went on. Least ways… I don’t think so… and never heard of any such thing in our family.
However, many people will tell you that they were sexually molested.. abused or raped by a close family member. Oprah, for 1, herself speaks of an uncle that sexually abused her. I even think Donnie McClurkin speaks of an uncle who abused him for years.
I have heard people testify about things that even their father had done to them sexually. So, these kinds of things do happen… and sad to say they happen more often than we all really care to talk about.
So, yes eyebrows would go up upon seeing such a picture. Or when they hear of such a thing as this picture. And to say that you both had on ‘swimming trunks’… Well, it simply does not wash.
In fact, Bishop Trotter’s explanation for how the picture came about… the events surrounding it… and how he and his grand-daughter ended up in the same bathtub together in what looks like they are both naked… really opens the door to a whole lot of other questions?
In fact, if you really listen to that radio interview Bishop Trotter actually states that there was no reason for his little FOUR YEAR OLD GRAND-DAUGHTER to not be able to take a bath with her ‘pa-pa’ if she wanted to. WHAT??? And evidently, the little girl at 4 years old must have been down on her knees or something while on his lap in that water. Because at 4 she would be taller than we can actually make out in that picture.
I recall the first time I ever saw Bishop Trotter… he at the time was part of Full Gospel under Bishop Paul Morton. And I think that was about the same time that I first saw and heard Bishop Eddie Long too. Shortly, after that Full Gospel conference both Bishop Trotter and Bishop Long broke from the Full Gospel Baptist organization, and decided to pursue their own separate church organizations, New Birth and Sweet Holy Spirit.
A few years ago Bishop Long fell into his own share of troubles by the way of 4 or 5 young men who had been a part of his New Birth organization. To which Bishop Long later settled out of Court with, for a few million dollars against allegations of sexual misconduct and abuse.
The moment I read the story and saw the picture of Bishop Trotter, I must say that it brought back memories of Michael Jackson… and all the controversies of Michael with little kids. Namely little boys…
And just like Michael, Bishop Trotter in his radio interview clearly states that he found nothing to be inappropriate about him being in a bathtub naked with a little child… much less a little girl. With Michael it was that he found nothing wrong with being in bed with little boys. And like Bishop Trotter, Michael said that he did it all the time.
Bishop Trotter stated in his radio interview that ‘he used to jump into the bathtub all the time with his son, and their army men.’ Then added ‘I guess the times have changed.’
It really has nothing to do with how times have changed… which is what Bishop Trotter was trying to pass off as an accuse for the uproar over the picture. Because when you get right down to it… it is not about times changing at all. It is about putting yourself in a situation where something could happen… or bringing a small child into something they are not supposed to be exposed to.
I recall how when we were small my mother used to take us to this wading pool in our neighborhood. All the kids loved for summer to come around… and so didn’t we. During the summer our mother always took us swimming when it got too hot. There were times when she would pack us up and drove us to the beach… or to the pond where we could feed the ducks… or to that small wading pool, that was not too far from where we used to live.
The pool wasn’t very deep… but got deeper as you stepped closer and closer to the center of the pool. In the center of the pool you could float or try to swim and then put your feet down, and stand up any time you liked. So, we had fun playing in it… splashing… and sometimes running through it.
But then there came a time when our little pool became invaded. An occasional Spanish man or 2 would get into the pool playing around with the children. They mostly hug out near the center of that small wading pool so you could not see below their waste. Therefore, anyone sitting along the far outside edges of the pool could see the children in the water… but nothing too much under the water that may have been going on. And of course, the pool always had lots of kids into and out or the pool or running in the water… or splashing about further obstructing any parent’s watchful eye.
But 1 day I came to find out why they… those men liked being in the pool with us… I saw something… and I never liked going back to that pool again.
I went to a convention where he was at in Virginia.
He was promoting his newest series “My Wife, My Mistress, My Bitch or My Whore”.
I had come across where Bishop Trotter had written that book a while back. The title was curious to me also… and like the person who wrote that comment over the internet… I too thought it very inappropriate. Especially, since Bishop Trotter had written that book about his wife… who was… is … and had been the mother of his children… and I guess at some point the First Lady of his church.
God bless…hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend. The weather has broke here. We are now experiencing mild weather today… but for past couple of days it was freezing cold.
Remember that Monday… this coming Monday is both President Barack Obama’s second inaugural… AND Dr. Martin L. King, Jr.’s birthday celebration. Enjoy them both… and I am hoping to see you in D.C for the festivities. But if not please enjoy it for me too.
I am so happy about it. Truly a time to remember… And if you can be part of it don’t let the opportunity go by… by not being so.
And again…happy belated birthday FIRST LADY MICHELLE OBAMA… can’t close without saying that. Love you… In fact, I love you both…. And 49 is still a great year… A very special year in fact…
“Serena Williams said Armstrong let all athletes down by doping and lying about it for so long, while No. 1-ranked Victoria Azarenka says the disgraced cyclist “deserves everything he gets.”
“As an athlete, as someone that works really, really hard since I was 4 or 3, I think it’s a sad day for all athletes in general. Overall, it’s even more disappointing for the people that were adversely affected through everything. You can only just hope for the best for them.”
For years Armstrong had denied that he ever used any drugs to enhance his ability to become the top ranking bike cyclist in the world. And recently sat down with Oprah and confessed that he had lied.
5 comments January 19, 2013
So, here goes…
- When I was very young I kept having this re-occurring dream. It was always the exact same dream every night… and I always awoke at the exact spot in the dream. The dream scared me. So, one night I prayed to God to take the dream away from me. And He did…that very night…and I have never ever dreamed that dream again.
But I did not ever forget that dream.
In that dream I was always being chased…or so it seemed to me then…by these people with wings…like birds… who flew just above me… but somewhat slightly back just about over my head… 3 of them…
I always thought as a child…that they were chasing me. I never knew that God had dispatched them to watch over me.
And so I have…all my life…been watched over. Even though I prayed that prayer…and He stopped the dream…but He kept up the watch over me.
God’s favor….and I didn’t even know it until one of my brother’s told me… concerning something else in my life. And when he said, “Oooh, Bernadine, God favors you.” I really nearly fainted… that thang scared me nearly to death.
God favored me????
That was such a frightening thought.
All these million upon millions of people???
I’m still scared by the thought of it…but I know it’s true.
I do not know… But He does…He loves me…
- A while back last year I was at Newark Airport…and I was curious how many of the guys helping people with their luggage were there that day when they flew Whitney’s body in from LA?
I wanted to know if a lot people had gathered that day here at the airport?
That day Whitney flew into Newark Airport as she had never flown in before. She may have had a limousine… but she left that airport as she had never left it before.
We come all come into this world one way…and leave it in another. But as we existed before in another form… so shall be then exit here to be in yet another form. But whether we have victory or end up in defeat…life everlasting in peace and joy… depends entirely upon what we do while we are in this form…
- It has come to my attention just now that a lot of people come to me seeking my advice on a variety of subjects…and I counsel.
- Sometimes the matters are personal…other times they are legal…or affairs of the heart…or family issues…but whatever the subject or the matter I try to give good counsel…and sound counsel. And an ounce of wisdom…not really having a lot myself. But an ounce of good wisdom and rightly judgment is worth more than 2 barrels filled with foolishness…
- It is almost my son’s birthday. 32 years ago tomorrow I gave birth to a little bouncing baby boy…who had looked like he had been in a fight with Muhammad Ali. But he was mine… So, I loved him anyway. And when I first held him in my arms and looked down upon…I knew I couldn’t afford him.
So, by the time spring semester classes rolled around I started resuming my formal education.
One day while out walking with my son…he then was about 4 years old…he looked up and pointed at a man and said, ‘Ooh, look, mommie… there’s my daddy.’
Women do not demonize your children’s fathers. It does not matter whether ‘THEY’ do the right thing or not. It is absolutely wrong…and men you should not try to turn your children against their mother either. It’s wrong.
After son graduated I sent him away to school. The school did not have dorms and the small southern town it was in had no cabs or buses. So, I had to get him an apartment…a car…open him up a bank account…buy him a cell (which is also the time I got one just so he could stay in connect with me and me with him)…and paid monthly installments on his schooling.
I also hopped the bus from New York headed south to check all his monthly receipts…to make sure he was paying all his bills as he should with the money I would deposit into his bank account. And while there I always went grocery shopping…buying him enough groceries for the month…though he always had money to buy whatever he wanted…and could call me if he needed more.
Some time thereafter after settling my son in he contacted his father, he told me…and asked him for some money. My son told me that his father turned him down…and told him he should leave school and go back home until he could afford it. Needless to say I was furious at hearing this story. THAT…that man had told MY son to throw away everything I had invested in my son to get him to school and set him up properly so that he could do it…and he who had done nothing told him ‘go back home.’
When my son called and told me this story I was livid…but I did not speak badly against my son’s father…but I do have a few choice words for him if ever I should see him.
But I told my son ‘no’ that he was not coming home and he was going to stay in that school until he graduated…and he was not going to waste the money ‘I invested’ in getting him a car…a cell phone…an apartment…and paying tuition to that school. And that settled that.
Some time recently my son told me that his father had contacted him requesting a loan. Over a period of some years my son has connected with some of his father’s other children…sending gifts and things to his young nephews and nieces. Also, over the years…really in a short period of time after his graduation…my son has become very very successful in his chosen field. And I guess his father had heard.
So, when my son told me about the request for a loan I asked what he told him. And he said ‘I told him no.’
And I asked nothing further…but made note in my mind that was yet another conversation I was going to have to take up with my son’s father.
Fathers…AND mothers be good to your children. And they will be good to you…if you treat them right…train them right…and always seek to do good for them and by them…and DO give them a firm foundation in the Lord…and the things of the Lord. And they shall be blessed…and you shall be blessed of them…and shall reap well the rewards of a good harvest
This big head boy is well on his way to probably becoming a millionaire before he hits 40. That is why I put him down there in that school to sit among millionaires…not their kids but ‘them.’. So, that he would know them…and so that they would know him…
And oh, yes… I decided this year to let you really see me too. So, occasionally I will pop up… you just keep on reading my blogs and see… And this is me… But from time to time I look different…depending on a lot of different factors… You just keep looking out for me… : )
Well, the weather has been great. Spent the night in the hospital with 1 of my sisters the other night. All is well…and God is soooo good. Cannot thank Him ever enough.
Hope you enjoy the rest of this week. And I hope that all is well with you and your family too.
God bless…hoped you enjoyed it. I just thought I would share a little with you…
Add a comment January 11, 2013