Posts filed under: ‘Dorinda Clark Cole‘




JUANITA AT IT AGAIN…

I just happened to be on youtube when I saw this video and decided to click on it to see what Juanita was preaching about… only to be a bit surprised by her new look… and since the video was just uploaded a few days ago it is very much a ‘new look’ for her.   A bit too much 76162-4022909023plastic surgery for sure… and the make-up does not help.  It only makes her look worst …and again like she is in some kind of spiritual trouble.

bynum2-jpgc200I suspect after somewhat watching her transition into this ‘new Juanita’… the 1 before this… it is not hard to see that she has had this thing about how she looked. juanita-banner It appeared to be some kind of self-hate… or maybe that is too extreme.  Let me say a  dislike for her natural facial features.

Yes, that sounds better.

Looking at the photographs displayed at the beginning of her video… her program intro as this seems to be a new undertaking for Juanita…with unknown-1 her in a cap and jeans… Juanita seems be trying to recapture her youth… or some kind of teen to 21 hip look or something.yolanda-adams

In listening to her video below it appears to me she is trying to join the ranks of dorindaloltYolanda Adams… Donnie McClurkin, Kirk Franklin, Dorinda Clark and that marymary sister, Erica Campbell… on the radio air-waves with a syndicated national radio broadcast.

1275283948_a20f0250e9But being Juanita… she appears to not only be happy being on the radio air-waves… but also wants to have video live-streaming juanita_bynum_071712_400jrwwhile she broadcasts her radio show.   And this show… or broadcast… or this video take of it was evidently recorded with a very bad camera with terrible audio… and doesn’t appear to really be a live radio show but a pretense of doing it live in her home.  Nor does it appears to be anything like the Juanita Bynum I have come to know via my observation of her.  She has always been on top of her sound.

If nobody else on the podium sounds good… you can beat she is going to sound greatjuanita-bynum-1 because she leaves nothing to chance when its come the quality of her sound… which is, of course, her money maker.   But no so in these videos.

_mg_6351Now, many thousands of people no longer go into a read radio radio to broadcast their radio shows because technology today has made it so easy to do it that way… if you have
good quality professional or semi-professional equipment… and have someone close to being a professional set it up for you.  You can broadcast from anywhere in the download-11world… even in your bathroom or a cave…  and nobody will know whether it was in or out of a professional broadcasting studio.

But clearly, we can tell that this video tape was done with professional equipment …or some high level recording equipment… camera with a good mic or a mic tied in.

wpid-20141001_19095411But it is not the technical problems with Juanita’s video … but the evident continued plastic surgery which it appears she is continuing to engage in… and her new hair that she is so busy flinging all over the place… and her body language …and total look of glee that makes you wonder… is she back on drugs?

juanita-bynumHow could Juanita possible be so happy with her new look… in looking so overjoyed while recording this video.  In which in my opinion she looks far less than her normal self.

Just with all the batting of her eyes so continuously.  And all her what appears continuous movements… and such personal internal glee within herself … you can’t help but wonder is Juanita herself under the spell of drug addiction which she preaches about in the first video. juanita-bynum-mugshotillegal-drugs-650x01

After Pastor Zackary Timms being found in a New York hotel dead from a drug overdose… we should all be on the lookout for who else may be in trouble.  We are so busy just listening to these folks and fail to recognize that some of our pastors, evangelists etc. are in trouble.

zachery-tims-microphone-smile-facebookaf32ac49ec91d4ac8e3a87b317fd9c43There were definite signs that Pastor Timms was in trouble.  I can clearly say that.   I will never forget seeing him 1 day leap up on his podium like he was Batman or Superman.  And I recalled thinking where was the reverence to God’s altar in what he had done?

juanita-bynum-fall-life-coaching-retreatListen how fast Juanita is talking in her video… all that hyper energy that is clearly displayed.
I once was having a conversation with someone who was talking to me about possible employment.  While speaking with this person someone else was standing nearby observing this conversation.  When we had finished talking and the person had left… the unknownperson who had been observing said to me, ‘Did you see how she was moving?   How she never stopped moving?   And how she was talking?’

I said, ‘No.’

juanita-bynum-1040kc021811I know nothing about addiction.   Or people under addiction.  But the women who had been standing watching that conversation knew plenty about it.  And she began to educate me.

juanit

She started saying, ‘Didn’t you notice that she used to be a junkie?  How she rushed through their words while speaking, how her eyes move?  How she could not stand still or sit still

No, I had not noticed… nor did I know how to pick up on those type of things.  I knew nothing about how people show signs of things of addition or past addiction… actions that are not natural for folk normally.  That is exactly what I hear and see in this video of Juanita.  9ebbc5185e1dd1c3a5405ebad4f6ceab

Juanita is not acting 5730b607d72b6c72c77f8c12ede0e9d3as she normally acts. Her actions and language are out of sync with the Juanita we see displayed in most of her videos… while delivering the word or trying to share thoughts on tv or in her other videos.

No, this is an irrational fidgety Juanita… with eyes that keep rolling and batting uncontrollably… racing through what she is speaking about.  Look at her eyes.  Listen to what she is saying.76162-4022909023

Clearly, Juanita is either drunk or high… or maybe both.    All that flinging of hair… particular articulation of certain words… treats of hitting somebody… fast un-expectedhqdefault  jerky erratic movements… and just a pattern of cb6ba2d08c981419622641eebd2399ddirrational behavior for Juanita … it all clearly says Juanita is very much out of character.  And her in the photo shots in her show intro at the beginning and end of her video …of her in pants and
cap looking very much like Beyonce speaks volumes also.

I am not certain that Juanita has not taken money to promote the music of the artists that me-resizedshe is featuring in her video shows.  But she gives each song’s date when it will be able for purchase, so that might be a hint.

Okay, I’m waiting on a very important telephone call now.  So, I must stop here.  And I am suppose to be editing… so much for that.   But I must go but you enjoy the rest of the week, and have a good weekend.   At some point I hope to find time to talk about Donald Trump… what a mess this whole political cycle has become… 1 big joke if it weren’t so serious.

Well, God bless… and thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” http://www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©201

juanita-bynum-e1342725330234

UPDATE:  September 27, 2016… Truly speaking Juanita Bynum is getting weirder and weirder with each and every 1 of these videos she does.  Note bwrkkcdcaaa1kdxhow she grabs hold of her nose as she just finished taking a snort of cocaine or something.

ed6f930fdd158ed3fe71669e5f324025This is a woman who is usually so up on the quality of everything she puts out.  But all these latest videos released by her doing this ‘new thing’ lack her usual attention to detail … particularly when it comes to the audio of these videos.

In the video I just posted below she has a leg up with her legs wide open.  I know …. I’m old school.  But isn’t she representing the Kingdom… is there not proper protocol regarding women and how we sit when in public?  And I really do not understand the new look with regard to her hair.unknown

It really does appear to me that maybe Juanita may be on her way to a crash.  She seems to be slipping… and long ago lost focus.

 

 

Add a comment September 15, 2016

Just a few words on things on my mind…. DIVERSE CRIMES… Cannibalism…

It appears that my gospel blogs… or blogs about preachers or gospel music personalities etc.  are infinitely more popular than most of my other blogs lately.  I find that to be interesting.

Though that blog I wrote on that father who had impregnated 3 of his own daughters has techwoman16x9been right up there since I posted that blog.  However, that story was sick.  But perhaps you like sick.  If so, then you are sure to get a kick out of this… though I must say it is not funny at all… and really not something to get a kick out of… nor meant to be.  But it appears that these kind of shocking stories today are more and more appealing to some people… and very appalling to many of us.   Here is 1 that  I have been thinking about since I read the story a week or so ago over the internet.

It is about some man in Boston who they tracked down via his internet content.  He was… I guess greatly into child pornography.  He had posted that he was into rapping and eating children… eating as in ‘eating chicken’… cannibalism.  Needless to say I am so happy that they caught him.  But I could not help but wonder if the img-Man-sentenced-in-child-porn-cannibalism-caseman had carried out any of what he had posted about.

Based upon his web content and various magazines and pictures of children that the police had found in his home,  the man was definitely a pedophile and also into satanism.  Was it not enough just stealing the innocence of young children more than enough?

Why eat them as meat too?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2417572/Geoffrey-Portway-dungeon-First-pictures-torture-dungeon-British-man-planned-rape-murder-eat-children-beneath-Massachusetts-house.html

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/mass-cannibal-plotted-rape-eat-children-feds-article-1.1453549

What happens in the minds of these people that they allow themselves to get carried away with such deep dark thoughts that take up residence within them for so long… something that resisting them gets to be no option.

Don’t we all have thoughts that can be scary if we allowed them to linger?

One of cousins told me that she used to drink heavily but 1 day she said she realized she had to quit.  mother and babyShe said that  on that 1 day she was sitting in a restaurant and across from her was a mother with a young baby.   She told me that the thought came to her mind suddenly to over to the baby and stab it death with her fork.  She said that that was when she knew then that she had to stop drinking.  And she did.

Could it be as simple as that?

Could all these deviant thoughts… crazy thoughts… frightening thoughts… be cast off of us if we just merely chose to refuse to carry out whatever that insane thing or deviant thing… or crazy thought… or frightening thing that came into our mind was.

I do know that such wild and intensely insane thoughts do come into peoples minds.  whats-wrong-with-bondage_o_443103Thoughts that when carried out… become unbelievable to those who knew of the person that perpetrated some  heinously insane act.

I know this because such an insane thought came into my head once.  It was around about the time after I had had… given birth to my son.  It was something crazy and lingered with me for a few hours if not for days.  I will not say what the thought was… but for some reason it had me, somewhat.  I, of course, I never acted upon it… but it was a deviant and a mad thing… the though of carrying out an action which came into my mind and spirit.

For those of you who believe in Biblical text than you will understand this statement… though for some of you it may not have much of a meaning if any at all.   But the Bible says, ‘We wrestle not with flesh and blood, but with principalities, spiritual wickedness etc…’   It is those principalities… those strange dark forces, that if you are not careful you can slip into… and it will use you like a wet rag then cast you off like filthy rags ready for the fire.

holy-bibleMy cousin fortunately had the hand of God upon her life… as did I.  But I think of those who don’t know Him… and have no idea how to break the chain of the demonic spirit that is forcing them to carry out some depraved act… be it murder… rape… incest… cannibalism… etc.

This makes me think of that school teacher… or rather that notorious ex-school teacher… a woman who started having a sexual relationship with a 13 or 14 year old boy in her class.  The draw of being sexually involved with that boy could not be broken off of her… no matter how much the court… our legal system had tried.  She even went to prison… whitehurst30n-4-web had been publicly humiliated and yet could not stop.  But again and again she would be found with that boy.  I recall seeing a TV news segment of 1 of her trials, as the woman stood before the court she began pleading for help.  She said, ‘I need help.’  That’s when I realize she was helpless in doing what she continued to do with that young boy.

I  doubt that the court or anyone in that courtroom really heard her.  But I did… it radiated at me.  She was doomed and needed to have that curse broken from her.  Courts and judges… lawyers and things like that they do not understand anything like that.  The operate in the natural.  But are some very unnatural forces out there.  But those who are those like me who know the Word of the Lord understand the spirits which can come in and attack people.  People who like me knew what type of real help that woman was asking for.  But she never got it.  Some years later she was released from prison and went back at it… her and that boy.  Though he was older now… and soon she began birthing children by him.  I often think of her at times… knowing that there is no way that either of them are probably happy today.

teacher-give-chance-to-studentsI, since hearing her plead for help… have always felt sorry for her.  And have prayed that the yoke upon her would be broken off of her.

There are those who are not strong enough … and they have no power through the power or strength… which in these cases none of us have any.  Only through God can the demonic spirits be cast out.   God alone can turn away the evil thoughts and actions that can creep into their minds and spirit.  But they simply do not know Him… the people who do such unspeakable things.  They have no relationship with God.   It is not through any strength of our own that keeps any of us… or has kept us from carrying out some crazy or insane acts, but through the working of God in our lives.

Because such forces are beyond anything that we can personally fight… or ever hope to truly battle and win on our own.  We need God to do it… as we simply do not have the power to do it.  It takes that Greater and Higher Power to handle it for us… to act on our behaves… least we fall prey to the evil that lurks in our minds… as that school teacher and countless hundreds of thousands… probably millions of others.

http://www.biography.com/people/mary-kay-letourneau-9542379

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/31/laura-whitehurst-had-students-baby_n_3684664.html

When you read news stories of 13 and 14 year old kids killing 1 of their mother’s and then APP2001011399614prepare to eat her liver… you have to realize that we are in the midst of some very dark times.  More and more stories of cannibalism are coming into the news lately.  There had been a time when such stories were big shockers…stories of people like Jeffery Dahmer.  But not today.  It appears to me that daily something on cannibalism can be found in the news… and it is very disturbing.

http://www.cnn.com/2013/09/20/us/teens-attack-mom-spokane/index.html

For years we had heard of people who were into things like witchcraft that carried out such acts as the drinking of human blood.  Speaking of which when I once worked in the Village, down in New York City… I was ever so surprised when 1 of my co-workers came out with this statement, of wishing he was a vampire.  Near the end of life hanging out in New York City, gay clubs and the Gay & Lesbian Center in New York…  I had become to be weary with all the dog collars and black leather suits.  They were starting to get strongly involved into satanism, I thought.  Whips and bondage had started to take a hold upon them…  dominatrix… S&M was the new pleasure.

It was not until a very attractive women came to Sala Soul 1 night that I realized just how much this thing was taking a hold of them.  The meeting that Thursday night was about 41Bfx-UzlKL._SX342_S&M… sadomasochism… whippings and bondage for sexual pleasure.  I had noticed that she was dressed all in black leather, but I had not made the connection.  It was appalling to me… actually down right shocking.  I was not prepared for that kind of topic… nor will ever be.   But that woman’s world was the world of S&M.

She spoke about this thing that she had fallen into with such excitement and joy… that it was really hard for me to remain in my seat and not hit the door.  Whereas everyone else in the room seemed to be taken by this thing that this woman was inviting them to become involved in… I rejected it.  It was hard for me to believe that anyone would ever believe that… it was the 1 who was in bondage… the person handcuffed or chained… or otherwise tied up and being whipped… was the person in control.

Come on, now do you really believe that?

If you are handcuffed and have put yourself in mercy of some crazy person with a belt or whip or paddle or some other torturous device… who is standing over you inflicting you with pain… do you believe you have any power to stop that person if they decide…    Well, decide to kill you… or continue to whip you though you cry out STOP?

No, you have no power… to stop them.  But this woman was saying something else.  And if handcuffs-130529you were sitting on the moon… like many of my Sala Soul Sisters seemed to be that, as they were very engrossed with the topic and the woman.   Then maybe you might have bought that… but I did not.  And nobody on this planet can tell me anything different.

But this is the mind-set of many people… to begin dipping into the macabre… stepping deeper and deeper into darkness.  They begin playing with things and thoughts that take them into deep dark places… where they become lost.

A year or so… or maybe a couple of years later I happened to come across 1 of young women Full-Length-Women-Leather-Jumpsuit-backwho had been at that Sala Soul meeting on S&M.   This woman had asked a lot of questions that night, and she really seemed more than slightly interested in S&M.  I guess she truly was.   Because when I came across her some time later she was wearing all black leather… the dress code of those in S&M… bondage.  I even made a remark about it black leather attire… and saw a look come across her face as if I had found her out.   She had emerged herself into that lifestyle… and was now 1 of them… and it is a lifestyle… a sub-culture of which even they have their own flag… a nation unto itself… of highly misguided people.  That was the last Sala Soul Sisters meeting I ever went to… and from that point on I began to move further and further out of  ‘the Life’… meaning gay life… being a lesbian.  I began to realize I had less and less common with them, my fellow Sala Soul Sisters.  My thoughts were changing… and at the end I had changed.

I thank God he put something in me that has kept me from totally going crazy… or following every insane whim that came into my mind.  I had limits and barriers that I would never cross because of my early child training.  Training does show up… and dog-christopher-street-day-afternoonBiblical scripture is true.  Train up a child in the way that it should go, and when he is old he will not depart.

Well, so much for that…  just thought I would drop in and share a few words.  Hope all is well with you… and that you continue to enjoy the rest of this week.

2ab-the-bishop-wifecoverOne final note on that man from Boston who was into rapping and eating children.  He requested that the state give him life… but his sentence is only for a term of 25 years.  I think the Judge should have heard him… and some kind of provision me resized...was written that he would never be release back into public life again.  The man obviously knows he has no power to resist the deep dark forces that lurk within him.

Well, God bless… and I guess I’ll see ya’ the next time I decide that I have something on my mind.  For the record this blog was 1 of hardest to find any YouTube video for… or some pictures I really liked.  Most of the stuff was just to gross or nasty for me to want to use it.  But then I guess that all really goes with the type of subject matter this blog was about.  Not much that any of us really want to see or know about.

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends“pass it on…”  www.bsmith101.wordpress.com  ©2013



Add a comment October 1, 2013

DENSEL… DIVORCE OR NO DIVORCE….

2013-07-21-Denzel and Pauletta Google Image-DenzelWashingtonPaulettaWashington30thSjeky6sufUxI was standing in the line at the check-out cash register when I happened to spot the magazine that read, “150 washingtons1Million Dollar Divorce.”  And with that notation on the cover of that magazine was a picture of Densel and his wife, Paulette,  of some near 30  years.

Needless, to say I was a bit shocked, because as far as I knew they adored one another.  And lets face it, based upon all that Densel has said about his family and wife… there is no way that anyone would believe that THAT marriage was not rock solid.

Well, is it or isn’t it?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/12/denzel-washington-divorce_n_3586774.html

The answer is… I don’t know.  But then is it really for me to know.denzel_and_pauletta_t750x550

denzel_washington5Perhaps I should not say this but once while taking some sessions with Spike at Long Island University, about the time that Spike was making Malcolm X.  In one of the sessions a young woman, who had worked closely with the production people.  A fairly attractive, I guess… white woman began talking about Densel in such a way that I could tell she had great disdain for him.  Celebrities attend the Ohio State at USC game at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum

densel300She claimed he had gotten fresh with her.  Maybe more than a bit flirtatious.  And she apparently did not like it.

Now, I’m not saying this is true.  But it came back to mind when I was reading the front cover of that magazine.

When I initially looked this story up over to internet to see if it were true, I could find nothing on it.  Nspl110552_0331ow, it seems that Densel is out and about saying ‘there will be no divorce.’  He is saying that there is no break-up inspite of what seems to not be 1 rumor …but rumors.

Densel Washington today is a top of his game a very high grossing actor… a super big action movie hero and heart throb.  His world today is a very far cry since his days on the small screen,  as a doctor at St. Elsewhere… or something or other like that, a hospital series that was on TV… some maybe 20 years ago.  At his leisure these days Densel commands upward and over $20 million per film.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/dorothypomerantz/2011/11/03/hollywoods-most-overpaid-stars/2/

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2212271/Denzel-Washington-wife-29-years-Pauletta-look-love-holiday-Italy.html

http://www.theroot.com/buzz/denzel-washington-denies-divorce-rumorsGoldene Kamera 2012 - Arrivals

Densel and Paulette started dating in 1977… 3 or 4 years later they married.  He was then a struggling and aspiring actor, and she was an denzela-and-famactor/dancer, some 5 years his senior.  They have been married 29 years… and are the parent of 4 or 5 children.

Since Densel is declaring that his marriage is not over… I guess unlike so many other couples… they both must feel that their marriage is worth fighting for.

Either that or all this talk about divorce really is… nothing but senseless rumors.

And I say bravo… to that.  Which ever 1 it is…sanaa-lathan-43rd-annual-naacp-awards-01

The alleged other woman is this… from what I gather, is actress Lanaa Lathan, of that hit movie ‘Love & Basketball.’

Didn’t she used to be  Omar Epps’ girl-friend years ago?

Lathan looks good now…and has always been pretty.  But Densel’s wife is beautiful.  And I know whatever he does… if this thing might be true…  Densel is going to be thinking about his kids… and the effects upon them and their mother.  And, of course, his pocketbook… otherwise that $150 million divorce article might come true.

At this stage of the game I believe Denzel to be mature enough to definitely not be going through that thing what Donald Trump and Ivana went through.  That thing which so many men say they go through.  That…that thing… which is actually an excuse for exchange in sexual partners and/or wives… called ‘mid-life crisis.’

Well, God bless… hope you are having a great week this week.  I am so happy that the BLD080493weather has broke.  I needed the relief from all that heat.

I am still nursing my foot.  Still trying my best to stay off of it as much as I can.me resized...

Again let me say that I want to thank those of you very much  who have ventured out and purchased my book… which can be ordered on-line at any number of 2ab-the-bishop-wifecoverwebsites… just google THE BISHOP’S WIFE by Bernadine Smith… and see for yourself.  And you can also read excerpts from my book on-line as well at Barnes&Nobles Nook, amazon.com etc…

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends“pass it on…”  www.bsmith101.wordpress.com  ©2013


Add a comment July 26, 2013

I DECLARE…It’s my day…

Today was 1 of those rare days.  You know the kind of day you rarely ever get.  A day you wake up knowing that if you don’t get up at all it will be alright.

Didn’t have to rush to go catch nothing.  No buses… no cabs… no car pool… no ride to the store… no NOTHING

No need to ask my son for the keys to the car.

No need to beg-

“Can I catch a ride with you?”

“About how long for the cab?”

“Will you come by and get me?”

Yes, I woke up not having to go anywhere… or having to do anything.

I could lay there and there… and lay there enjoying the warmth of my bed.

I didn’t have worry about nothing.  Didn’t have to rush off to finish this… or finish that.

Today was… and is all mine.  ALL  MINE… all by myself.

Nobody to say-

“Auntie this…”

Or, “Auntie that…”

Didn’t have to answer any questions.

Didn’t have to worry aboout getting caught out in the rain.  Or go searching in my bag to pull out my sunglasses.

Didn’t have to search for my keys… lace up my shoes…. or make sure everything I needed was in my carrying case. 2ab-the-bishop-wifecover

Didn’t have to ask nothing… say nothing… or particularly do nothing thing.  Just lay back and enjoy it.

A day all to myself.

Ahhhhhhhhh…..

Don’t you wish you had 1?

When was the last time you could say this?

They don’t come often.  And for that reason I am going to end this blog, and continue to enjoy my day… with me… myself… and I.

Well, God bless… I’ve got a few more hours to this day… and I mean to continue to enjoy them.

And whatever your day is like I hope that you are enjoying it too.

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends“pass it on…”  www.bsmith101.wordpress.com  ©2011


Add a comment October 24, 2011

Busy…but not forgotten…

Yes, I have been busy…but I have not forgotten you.

Often, in fact, I formulated blogs in my head.  It is just that they have not quite made it to the printed form.  And soon those thoughts faded away… lost forever in the recesses of my mind.

It gets like that…getting busy, I mean.  You get so caught up in something else that everything else…  Well, almost everything else falls by the wayside.

Then just this pass weekend 1 of my sisters had a heart attack.  Well, needless to say that can really send you into a tailspin…if you weren’t already into one.  So, I have been busy…and now I’m into a tailspin too.

There is something about having to deal with one’s mortality that will force you to view your own…your purpose… life… things done …and things yet hoping to get done.  Then there are those things which we don’t want to do but somehow feel lead to do.  And to tell you the truth that is what for the pass couple of  days I have been wrestling with the most now that all of this has happened.

For a while now I have had a feeling that I am been lead to preach… as in ‘Preacher.’  So, I began to not only read my Bible but I also started to study it.  You know that scripture that says…

“Study to show thou self approved…”

So, for the pass I don’t know what…over 2 years or so… I have been studying.  And recently I began videotaping a television program for Public Access…a series about learning to study your Bible.

But when my sister suffered her heart attack it now seems that I have just been stalling…trying to put off the enviable.

It is not that I don’t want to do it.  No, not that…though that is kind of it too.  But I lack the confidence to do it.  I can’t remember scripture…though I do believe that as the Bible says…

“He will bring it back to our remembrance.”

Yes, I do believe that.  And He has shown me that He does and will do it.  But it is just that… I don’t really want to preach.

I mean I have been in radio, introduces acts at concerts, promoted different events…  But…but this is different.

So, as busy as I claim that I have been…  Well, I haven’t been all that busy.  I have just been laying around…low key…thinking about what it is that God is asking me to go out and do.  And down deep inside…I really don’t want to do it.

But I feel I must.  And then again I am afraid if I don’t…  Well, I’m afraid of what God may do to me… or my family.  And that is what I think my sister’s heart attack was all about.

I don’t think it was about her at all.  But that it was about me …and what I am not doing.

How can you be instant in and out of season if you really lack what you think you need?

I know that God would not send any of  us out without fully equipping us to fulfill His need.  But yet I can’t bring myself to want to go out into the streets and just start preaching.

How can some people do that?

All of my life I think I have been prepared for where God wants me to be.  Somehow He trusts in me.  But I have no trust in myself… or maybe in Him as I should.

Pray my strength in the Lord that I decide to walk in the steps that God has ordered for me.

Yes… I have been busy.  And maybe later I will tell2ab-the-bishop-wifecover you all about it…but now I am going through something.

God bless…

If you want to read some excerpts from my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE,  you can go to my website…. www.bsmith101.com .  But before you do just let me tell you that the site is very much under construction.  So, it is a long ways from being complete or anywhere near what I want… not even close to it at this time.  But slowly…but surely I know it will be something that will meet all our expectations.

View Bernadine Smith's profile on FiledBySo, if you would please bear with me…I would appreciate it very much.  But you can at least read some excerpts 4_printer_Promo_Cars_b_smith2from my book there.   And if you desire to order my  book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE, please do so here in my blog…as I can’t get that link to work.

My book is also available via authorhouse.com, barnes&nobles.com, amazon.com, filedby.com and a variety of other outlets…including ordering it through your local bookstore.

I have not officially launched the sale of my book yet.  But while I was down in Charlotte for AIM, our church convention…guess who purchased my book?

Dorinda Clark Cole.

Yes, that is right.  THE’ Dorinda…of the Clark Sisters…the COGIC gospel singing sentations.

I still can’t believe it.  Dorinda bought my book!

I was trying to give her a copy of my book to give to her sister, Twinkie…and Dorinda said to me…

“No, I ain’t going to give Twinkie nothing.  If  Twinkie wants your book she is just going to have to come and get it for herself.  But I’ll buy your book.  I support people of the Kingdom.”

Yes, that is exactly what Dorinda said to me.  Amazing.

I only sold 1 book at A.I.M. and it was to Dorinda Clark Cole.  Amazing.

Here is my book trailer that I created last summer…  Now you get a chance to hear my voice and to see a bit of me as well.  And please keep in mind…that by profession… I am a radio announcer…and a filmmaker.  It does make a difference.

I’ll tell you more about AIM in another blog…and I do have lots to say.  It was so inspiring and fantastic listening and watching all the women and men of God… and speaking with many of them of as well.

THE BISHOP’S WIFE  is now on sale. And remember you can read a few excerpts from my book by going to …. www.bsmith101.comThank you. 


I am just hearing that Walter Hawkins passed while we were down in Charlotte.  I never heard anything about it while I was at AIM, a Church of God in Christ conference.  He had been battling cancer my son informed me.

It is hard to believe.  I never knew him or met him…but I was quite familiar with his music and that of his brother and ex-wife.  Who in the gospel world is not familiar with them?

His brother, Edwin Hawkins and his ex-wife, Tramaine Hawkins…both gospel giants in their own rights as well. 

What a great lost to this Kingdom on earth with a the lost of such a tremendously marvelous and anointed voice as Walter Hawkins.

Walter and Tramaine Hawkins, his ex-wife, had 2 children and also some grand-children from their union together

http://voices.washingtonpost.com/postmortem/2010/07/gospel-great-walter-hawkins-di.html

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/07/13/AR2010071306089.html

What a great lost.

Luckily my sister realized that there was something wrong.  I later found out that she drove herself to the hospital where upon checking her out…she was informed that had she not come she would have died.

Her heart was in such bad shape and she did not know it.  In fact, just last weekend we were all happily in Philly for a large family gathering celebrating the life of the matriarch of our family ‘at large’… our Great Aunt Kate.  But who would have guessed that in the midst of my sister’s chest a time bomb was ticking.

If you would like to know some symptoms of an on-coming heart attack CLICK these LINKS below.

http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/actintime/haws/women.htm

http://usgovinfo.about.com/cs/healthmedical/a/womensami.htm

Be safe and keep yourself monitored by getting regular check-ups… and don’t forget to tell your doctor…

“What about my heart?”

It seems they check almost everything else but that when it comes to women.  And more and more of us are dying from it.

My mother did.  So, if heart failure runs in your family it is never too soon to start having it check.

And lets all start eating a little bit healtier.

Well, God bless…again.

UPDATE: July 29, 2010… My brother just mentioned this to me in passing.  I was not aware that the current Musical Director of the Church of God in Christ International Choir, Judith McAllister was even married…or much less that her husband had been indicted for fraud.

One could say that when it rains it pours…  Since becoming the head of the international musical department of the Church of God in Christ Dr. McAllister has been faced with one problem after another.

http://www.1800gospel.com/2010/05/husband-of-judith-mcallister-indicted-for-fraud/

There was the issue of  Kim Burrell wanting to go secular… and also I think the issue that the music department has lack a certain level of  spiritual direction that it once had under it former leaders.  None of the songs seem to connect any more.  There seems to be a lost in ‘the anointing’ that had long been a marker… a brand specific almost to the COGIC church which it had since its founding, some 103 years ago… being the  largest and one of  the oldest Pentecostal Churchs in the world.

Last year when I sat in on a workshop held by the COGIC scholars at AIM…my brother spoke on the topic of spirituality in the music.  It was something that he said Bishop Mason was very particular about.

In the part of his dissertation, my brother wrote that Bishop Mason, the founder of the Church of God in Christ, wanted the music to come alive and be felt deep down within the soul of the people.  That is something that under Judith McAllister the National COGIC Choir seems to have lost.  The songs had no depth… no feeling …no emotions… nothing that brings tears to your eyes… or moves you as the songs once had.

I don’t know but someone came up on this site saying that Dr. McAllister has decided to step down from her post as the International Director of the COGIC Choir..though they said ‘removed’.   I guess all of this might be following the allegations surrounding her husband… his arrest and indictment.   He was a Special Agent employed by the FBI and stationed in Nashville, TN… who I guess you could say ‘decided he wanted more out of life and decided to take it.’ 

I do not know if  it is true or not…that she has stepped down but if so…  Her husband is facing 19 counts of fraud, bank fraud, wire fraud etc…etc… which all totals more than 340 years in federal prison.   To that…all I can say is I really did not see what was wrong with the COGIC  International music Department as it already was anyways.

http://www.justice.gov/usao/tne/pr/2010/May/McAllister%20Press%20Release.htm

Thank you for reading this blog…and  my others.  Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family to em , co-workers and all your friends“pass it on…”  www.bsmith101.wordpress.com  ©2010

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