Posts filed under: ‘same-sex marriages‘
It is hard to know where to begin with this blog since I have so many different things on my mind. But let me begin with this…
As I just came across it on a Facebook post… where the mayor in Houston had proposed to allow transgender people to legally use the bathroom facilities that they identify with.
Needless to say… why write certain things into law?
They already do it. So, such a thing is really kind of stupid. But the other side of the coin is this …writing such a thing into law opens the door for many women to become victimized by men looking for new opportunities in ways to victimize women. What I mean by this is this.
Most times women go into a bathroom… it is usually not full… not unless you are at a club or some large social setting. A lot of times we are the only ones in bathrooms. When we enter the ladies room we do not expect anyone stronger than us to overpower us and shove us into stalls to rape us… or to carry out any other type of crime that people perpetrate against women. But such a city ordinance would open the door for such a thing to happen to women. As just anybody could walk into any bathroom they wanted and not necessarily have in mind the intention of using the toilet.
Not to mention women often allow their children to go into the ladies room… most of the time under their care. But such an ordinance would put at risk both a mother and a child if a deranged person were watching them… and then followed them into a co-ed bathroom. Whereas such a person entering into the ladies’ room would easily be spotted if the bathroom facilities were not co-ed.
In places where perpetrators look for unsuspecting victims …such as in movie theaters and amusement parks where there are always large number of children this type of policy would be very disastrous.
But is this thing right?
I say, ‘No.’
And it is a resounding ‘no.’
Perhaps I am a little bit too caution. Or maybe you just think I am being super homophobic. But it is not the homosexuals I am thinking about. I’m thinking about the people who would take such an ordinance and use it to prey upon certain people…such as unsuspecting women and possible children, as many times children do go into bathrooms with their mothers. And these people are not gay… they are rapists… child molesters… predators of every sort.
And believe me… I would rather fall on the side of a little per-caution rather than hearing someone say, ‘I’m sorry. We never dreamed this sort of thing would happen.’
All this might stem from the fact that I was abused as a child. I really don’t know. Or it may stem from the fact that I have been stalked several times. Now, that I do know.
I think about it this way… if it ain’t broke ‘don’t fix it.’
What is wrong with having the women’s bathroom for women, and the men’s bathroom for the men?
Has not that system worked all these years?
With regards to the home situation… Well, is totally different. We are at home. We all know each other… ans supposedly nobody is trying to prey upon another. We grow up using bathrooms inside the home as a family. But in public the same principles do not apply. And it has always been broken down as facilities for men… and separate facilities for women.
Why mess with that now?
One could say that this is the problem that we have with our medical system in this country today. Who in the world started messing with it?????
We had a system that used to work. People used to be able to see qualified doctors not just people tied into their medical plans, who only issue prescriptions for medication manufacturers tied to pharmaceutical companies who own their plans… to whom their now doctors are also tied to. Kind of a vicious little circle… called lets keep the money in-house. And that is exactly what they do… if they can.
Sure our old medical system might have had issues… lets face it nothing is perfect. But it had worked fine for hundreds… maybe thousands of years more or less as it was. The pluses were (1) you could pick and chose your own doctors. (2) Hospitals had to treat people whether they had insurance or not. And (3) if a doctor wasn’t working for you… you could just pick up your marbles and go to another one without asking the doctor you are trying to rid yourself of… to write you a ‘referral.’
Who thought of this ‘doctor’s referral‘ thing?
We are not children. Why do we need to ask a doctor ‘may I?’
Or ‘can I?’
And if they won’t then… you can’t. You are just plain STUCK.
That is just a little bit too much control over patients if you asked me.
But going back to my original issue with removing ‘MEN’ and ‘WOMEN‘ signs from public toilets….or those little pictures that mean ‘MEN’ or ‘WOMEN’ toilet facilities. I clearly understand what probably escapes many people… is that who is going to get blamed when stuff starts going wrong with making such an sane which to our long established system of public toilet facilities.
Most people like to believe that the people who perpetrate crimes on children… particularly on boys… little boys are all gay. If you only knew. Nothing could be further from the truth. If you could only hear some of the gay guys talking on this subject, then you would certainly know THAT to be a lie. Most gay men… and women… if not all of them… hate people who perpetrate sexual crimes against children …or anyone else for that matter.
I know personally that many gay people get mad when these people… sexual perverts such as NAMBLER… North American Man/Boy Love Association… attempt to tie or associate themselves to the gay community. Mostly because those men involved in that kind of thing are not gay. They think of themselves as straight men who merely love having sex with very very young boys. These men are low life predators. A bunch of six depraved men with warped minds. Of whom I have absolutely no tolerance whatsoever for.
The Nambler men are sexual deviants straight out of hell who prey upon very very young boys while living what appears to be very regular lives as heterosexual men… and men who seek out very very young little girls to do the same… they are just as intolerable. They are all highly deceitful. Many are married and/or have girlfriends… some even have their own children.
We are living in a time when laws and ordinances are being created and made that will cause more harm to our society … than at any other time. And crimes are becoming more and more heinous… and laws more and more lacks.
Who thought of legalizing marijuana?
Who approved it?
Now, you not only have to careful and the lookout for drunken drivers… or those under the influence of all those other long recognized nonlegal and legal drugs out there. But now also have to be on the lookout for people driving around buzzed… under the influence of marijuana, whose system is just as whacked out and as much impacted by effects of marijuana as anyone who has been drinking or using some other narcotic drug.
Now, these guys are selling marijuana stocks and bonds on Wall Street to fund their marijuana farms.
This whole thing is becoming very insane. My father would say… ‘the world is going out backwards.’ And it truly is.
Pandora’s box is being left wide open. And there is no turning back the terrible tide that it is unleashing upon this world.
Fools and depraved minds have taken over our Courts and government. They are creating laws and writing into place legislation that are turning this world upside down.
Having been in ‘the life‘ for many years, of course, I do understand why gay people wanted the right to be legally married. I myself had personally witnessed and knew of several relationships where one partner or lover had died. After having spent many years together I saw where families stepped in following the death of their family member deciding to take over everything from the surviving lover in that relationship… including the funeral arrangements. Just ripping everything out of the hands of the surviving partner or lover.
They may have had amassed a house… and/or a business… or other items purchased and/or paid for together… or co-owned by the both of them… but in came their family. They took control over the dead body… and eventually forced the surviving partner out.
So, yes I can understand how having some level of law to protect what 2 people had accumulated together would be helpful to them. Particularly in light of greedy family members… who many times cast off their gay family member years ago… only to re-emerge following their death to declare to their surviving lover ‘you don’t own anything here… and get out.’ But then I have seen that in heterosexual relationships too… where people lived together for years and failed to marry.
But did the law governing marriage have to be rewritten to provide for that is my question?
I think not. That right could have been gotten a whole entire way without trying to redefine marriage as something other than what God intended marriage to be… and between whom He intended it be between.
But their are people who have been put in place to bring about any change that delights that other spirit that also inhabits this world. Just a chosen few people in the right places is all it takes to set about a change that effects everyone in the land. And that is the problem with our system… it doesn’t take the masses to do it any more.
Today just a small group of people can decide to do something… and BAM! It is done. Things changed that you never thought you would see changed.
Who would have guessed that marijuana would ever get legalized in this country?
Next it will be crack cocaine… then cocaine and everything else. Why not… it all makes money?
Even lying after Bush became acceptable if it somehow can be seen to serve greater good. Or some kind of meaningful …or in Bush’s case devante purpose. But nobody started throwing stones at him when they finally found out he lied about ‘weapons of mass destruction,’ as a means for him to invade Iraq and start an unnecessary war, in order to push up gas prices and make his family richer. And that it ended up killing millions of Americans, mostly young college kids for no good cause.
There is someone somewhere making BIG BUCKS from marijuana …and that you can bet your money on it. Otherwise, how did marijuana stocks hit the stock market so quickly?
And who are the really people cashing in on it?
Probably the people who have always been at the top of the illegal American drug trade in the first place.
No, there are things happening in our government today… that even those guys on Capitol Hill… the insiders know and are dealing with …who are pulling all the strings to our never before. And because we now live in a global economy… our inter-actions in the global world… wield lots of global influence… that person or persons may not even be American… nor Americans. But they are for real.
They are getting things done that no of us ever dreamed would ever be done. And the change that they are effecting is not for the good of this country.
Not at all.
If, indeed, legislators were legitimately looking to legislate some good policy they should take a look at the evils in this world and sincerely seeks ways to remove and/or lessen them… not open the doors for more to come about.
But the 1 thing that stays on my mind about that whole thing is how nearly 300 school girls were kidnapped from their school… and nobody did nothing?
How did that happen?
Most of the problem in this case stems from world interest in this story and the fact that the Nigerian government officials do not want the involvement of outsider aid… such as the United States… in assisting them in freeing the girls … or seeking freedom for them. Most of it boils down to political pride on the part of the Nigerian officials not wanting it to be seen as they cannot handle their own affairs. Of which they evidently cannot based upon the kidnapping of these young girls they are in dire need of some help… from someone.
Why be so proud that you cannot accept assistance in such a matter as this?
It is foolish. If any of the government official’s daughters were involved they wouldn’t be able to accept help quick enough. But it is evident that none of their daughters is at risk.
There is no telling as to what is happening to those young girls when you consider the treatment of women who have be taken by such groups as the bunch of criminals who claimed that they took these girls. It is not uncommon for women/girls to be raped, beaten and abused in an array of various ways including sold into bondage and prostitution.
I am thankful we have a President who cares about Africa …and her people. Thank you, President Obama.
I know people are going to think I am whack-co but since I am on the subject let me take a moment to go back and hit upon this subject regarding transgender individuals as well. It appears to me that this whole thing is becoming more and more rampant. It has become a trend …and it is growing fast.
There was once a time when transgender and yes, even drag queens were kind of looked down upon. But a boom is on to change all of that. Their ranks are growing… and growing even at early ages.
It is almost becoming a fab now among many in the gay community. Kind of like all this body piercing and tattooing that has grown so popular… and tattooing lately. And not only has it become popular… trendy… but it is even becoming acceptable to many outside of the gay community.
Few people used to talk about such things as ‘I feel like I was born to be a man’ if they were a woman… or vise versa. But there is lots of chatter about that now. The seeds have been laid… and it has become like a ranging fire swirling out of control.
It kind of reminds of my niece saying to me 1 Sunday, ‘Auntie, I don’t want to go to this church any more. I’m not being fed.’
Not being fed?
What did she know about not being fed. It was not she like she was saved or anything… or even paying any attention much during our church services. But she had heard someone else said it. And that was all she needed… to being her own reverberating of those words ‘I’m not being fed.’
The true being told no church was going to feed her spiritually as she, at that point, was not really interested in being in church at all anyways.
So, what I am trying to say here is this… all these people declaring that they are something other than what God created them to be… be it male or female. They have been bitten by a bug… and the world today is full of people who follow what other people do. This stems from hearing something like ‘I never felt comfortable being a girl’… following somebody sitting on some television show… national, of course… sounding and looking every bit like a man or ever bit like a woman. And the viewer internalizes that notion and begins feeling and saying that exact same thing… as they start working their way to becoming a transitioning something or other.
It is really rather sad to me. But who knows …when the devil had me… he really had me too. So, who knows if this trend had been so hot and heavy in my days what I might not have elected to do it too?
Perhaps I should not cast any stones. But thank God that is not my mind today. For the devil no longer has be captive.
But now I am seeing them everywhere… transgender people. And reading and hearing more and more about people ‘transitioning.’ Meaning slipping out of being 1 type of sexual being into another… as in going from being… or appearing to be male to appearing to be female via surgery, shots and medication etc.
For a while now I have been thinking about a friend of mine who recently was informed by her daughter to begin calling her ‘Harry’ or some nonsense… (I am kind of playing with the name here as I do not wish to disclose the real name). But yes, she has begun eating up all those pills and seeking to undergo the surgery.
I cannot think of anything more which resembles self-hate more to me than an act such as this. And the thing seems to have become more and more popular… and widespread among those in the gay community.
And that is what they say ‘I hated myself because I knew I was suppose to be a girl.’
You know what the devil is the great deceiver. All of my life until most recently I used to think of myself as being ugly. I really thought I was ugly and never like taking pictures. I didn’t want any mirrors in my room. I rarely looked at myself in the mirror. But you know what a few years ago I started thinking about something…
I have been stalked at least 5 times in my life if not more. And I started thinking about that.
I had had some very beautiful girlfriends… but none of them had ever been stalked. Or least ways not to my knowledge. So, I wondered 1 day ‘why me?’
It was not until I started trying to get a picture for the back cover of my book, THE BISHOP’S WIFE, that I discovered something. And it came about shortly after I got saved… and came into the realization that God never created anything ugly.
So, now as I was looking for a picture for my book… I also began to see myself in a new and very different light. And in that light I realized that I had never ever been ugly.
I laugh at it now because for over 40 nearly 50 years I had felt that I was not attractive at all. I just never saw what I see now… and I have attached this picture of me so you can see too. Isn’t it funny. Stalked at least 5 times …and I mean seriously stalked. Once so bad I almost had a nervous breakdown because I became so terrified. And I have been stalked by men and women.
But once I came into the light… and the scales were removed from my eyes I began to see me that had always been there… but I had never seen before because… to me … in my eyes then I was ugly.
So, now you see me. And, of course, that is me below also. But when the devil has your mind …he can make you believe anything… even that you are man when you really are a woman. God does not make mistakes. But the devil does… and often. Don’t let him fool you too.
When my friend’s daughter… her other daughter called me up and told me the story about her decisions to become a man… my mind began to take a tumble. It is hard for me to wrap my mind around anyone wanting to destroy them-self in such a horrid way as this… as an act of trying to re-order their sexual gender would be doing. And all I could think of was the woman… really a man who tried to join Salsa-Soul Sisters. An act which met with such furry that the person was totally forced out of our group sessions and following that night stopped entirely coming to our Salsa-Soul Sisters meetings at all.
Those lesbians called an emergency meeting where immediately they voted in unanimously ‘that no person who is not born bio-logically a woman could ever be a board meeting of Salsa-Soul.’ And they meant every word of it.
And I mean they all rush into that meeting that night… for that emergency meeting. The only emergency meeting I think Salsa ever had. Sisters I hadn’t seen in years… some I even think got up out the grave to attend that meeting.
It was a pivotal point in Salsa-Soul Sisters history that night. I think in the lesbian world really… in how we all view some things… Salsa was a scared female only organization. So, a man… even 1 dressed up as a woman.. with boobs etc… Well, a thing like that was not acceptable to us… to none of us. And a man… going through a sex change to become a woman so he could be a lesbian… was not acceptable to those real 100% lesbian women who came into that meeting to voice their opinions on the matter… and it would never be and they made sure of that. Lease ways not as a board member of their prized and beloved organization… Salsa Soul Sister, Inc. And I have to say… I agreed.
But the odd point is this … as freaky as that whole thing was to me… and as it was to my fellow Salsa-Soul Sisters… I never saw where it might ever become a larger issue. A world issue… if you get my drift. As I now see it becoming.
This thing is large and it incorporates changing legal documents which are adjusted to the conform and affirm the status, name etc. of the said person. This includes drivers licenses and everything… which once read ‘male’ are now changed to read ‘female.’ And to me that is scary. Because these people move away from home where nobody knows them and present themselves to unsuspecting people as someone totally different from who they really were born to be… and they look many of them every bit the part of who they are trying to pretend to be… and sound like it too with the help of all of what they are taking by way of medication to assist in their incredible changes.
If questioned about it… saying that someone questioned if they were a man or a woman?
All they have to do is pull out this new false licenses, passports etc… listing their new names, social security numbers and sex on them. And who could argue that they were not who or what they claimed to be.
Today the amount of people opting to change their sex is staggering to me. It is like a fad with many people deciding to do it… like changing an old hat or pulling off an old tee shirt.
Whenever I am talking to the sister of the daughter who is going through this type of change… which is called ‘transitioning,’ I avoid speaking about her sister at all now. As the thing really is a bit too much for me… and I would rather not hear about it. But I understand that she has had her breast removed and her voice is changing. And ‘yes’ she is beginning to grown facial hair… so the process of looking more and more like the male species is well underway for her … as well as, sounding like 1.
The sister has told me that her mother and everybody else in the family is calling her ‘him’ now… and by his adaptive name… ‘Harry.’ Which really surprised me. Because I would not have believed that their mother would have fallen into that game… and it is a game. Really it is. And it is a game that I just cannot play… because it would be lying… and too accepting of your child going through that process.
If your child was a robber would you accept that?
I think not. Then why accept a change that is going to alter your child into someone or something you will no longer recognize …and living in such a diverse lifestyle that is bound to bring them nothing but unhappiness later on down the road… if not already And it will.
I hear that Chaz… Cher’s daughter has found that it may have been the wrong choice for her… in altering herself or attempting to alter herself into a man. Let’s face it… Chaz will always be known as Cher’s daughter whether they call her Chasity of not. We can all agree that she looks and sounds ever bit like a man. But at the end of the day she is just a woman who had a sex change. And THAT, my friend… really doesn’t add up to being a ‘real man.’
How could I go around calling someone ‘her’ or ‘she’ when I know that they are a ‘he or a her?’
And since I would rather not hurt their feelings it is best ‘we’ do not come together at all.
Now, I am not for disowning people. Or throwing away ones children. That would be down right wrong. But we cannot accept all kinds of junk either. A parent cannot discard their child… and should not. But this whole ‘I changing my sex thing’ certainly should not be forced down any parent’s throat either. That is the feeling I got about my friend’s daughter… she had no respect of what or how her parents felt about it. Or cared about how they felt about it. It was her way or no way. So, her mother conceded and began calling her daughter ‘he’ and ‘him’ … and whatever name she is calling herself.
I had lovers… a few of them even met my parents. But I was 1 of those people who was very discrete about my relationship with the women I went to bed with. I certainly never kissed or held their hands in the company of my parents… or out in mixed company anywhere. In fact, while in the company of my parents it never came to me to want to. Because… I guess I respected them too much to want to.
I have always maintained and still maintain… that my life is my life. I also felt that it was not necessary for me to go shouting through the streets or around world who I was sleeping with. And I have always maintained that I really did not care who other people were sleeping with as long as it was not involving children or animals. Outside of that… it really wasn’t any of my business.
Though I had a friend working at a radio station in New York and 1 evening I accompanied her to the radio station, and upon greeting someone she noted to me privately ‘that he likes young boys.’ She went on to say, ‘boys between 4 and 7.’ I never went back to the radio station with her after that… because all I could do was kind of stare at the guy and think that somebody should put him out of his misery. Such people have to be sad people to me.
How could you live with yourself doing such a thing?
I don’t know how she could work in a place like that… with someone like that. I could barely make it through the evening knowing what she had told me about him.
But how does anyone share information like that with anyone?
And how does anyone not report him?
And you would have had to have seen the guy… never would you have guessed it. Tall… muscular… good looking kind of guy… normal on the outside. But dark on the inside… filled with some deep dark secrets. It was written in his eyes… I think.
Why or how he managed to share them… that kind of information about himself and his sexual forays with my friend I do not know. But that was all she had to say to me to keep me away from that radio station ever again. But I have never forgotten him. Because there was something rather sad about him… as well. You cannot live like that… or that kind of life and not be sad. A very sad sad person.
But back to this transgender revolution that is exploding all over the place. It is sad to see how the world is going backwards. How twisted and turned around people are becoming. There is a lost of direction… and everything bad seems to be in. Or appears to be the latest thing to do. Even Bruce Jenner, step dad of the Kardashians and an Olympic champion, in his younger days… has gotten in on the transgender act. I is hard for me to see or understand why so many people are electing to do so… or are so guns-hoo for it. It boggles the mind.
And what is even more mind boggling to me… is the fact that many once they undergo their change now classify themselves as being ‘straight.’ Meaning they do not want to be classified as being gay or transgender etc… etc… at all. They think of themselves as being totally man or woman… not transformed being. This thing is crazy.
That is what I think about this whole new thing… crazy. This whole thriving world of transgender individuals…. people who think that it is ‘hip’ … I am dating myself here I know but I can’t think of another word that fits better than ‘they think it is ‘hip.’ ‘Hip’ to be an ‘it.’
I have seen them… seen pictures of them… and they seem to be happy outwardly…and loving who they are pretending to be. But I know that is a lie. You cannot be really happy or love anything …and be out so of alignment with God.
You did know this part was coming. Least ways I hope you did… because I could not leave this blog without bringing Him up. He does play a factor… a major factor in all of this. Especially since He created us all.
Oh, you can appear to be happy. But appearing to be happy and being happy are 2 totally different things.
What God has made us to be… that is what we are. And no doctor or amount of chemicals or operations can change it. Your DNA is your DNA and that is God’s doing. Everything else is meant to be confusion… strife… and deceitful.
Do not let the devil destroy you. And if your child is dealing with these issues remember you can’t change them… therapy can’t change them… but God can. He changes and mind and the heart… He changed mines. Just keep your children lifted up in prayer. Pray without ceasing and love on them …and let God do His perfect work in them.
My parents prayed for me. And you see me as I am today… God made a new creature out of me. And He didn’t need any medication or shots or surgery to do it.
One last thing before I get out of here…
This woman here and her daughter… turned male supposedly… are just looking for a reality show deal on the backs of this whole transgender mess. If they don’t already have 1. The thought of it makes me sick… because it puts out there this concept of changing your sexual identity is alright… that it is good… and okay… and above all… it can make you happy and ‘in.’ And so many many many people are just looking for anything that will make them ‘in’… they are looking for anything that make them more friends or gather them some attention. They are looking for their 15 minutes of fame and possible fortune.
And if you ask me this woman is definitely pimping her daughter… and the look of her daughter’s face…says she is loving every minute of it. It is all about money, baby
You do see what her cap says don’t you?
Or maybe they are both just pimping each other…
Well, God bless…. I have got to get started on something else before I get out of here. So, I have to end now. But you will not believe that I actually wrote this blog several weeks ago… and I am now just getting around to adding all the finishing touches to it today. Oh, well… Hope you enjoy your weekend and I truly do God will bless you and keep you well.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2014
When you watch this stuff it really really makes you scared for the world… and all its people. It is frightening times because the devil is taking the minds… hearts… and bodies of our children. And some parents are aiding in that process.
This stuff is sick… and very distressing… Perilous times…. II Timothy 3:1…
UPDATE: Wednesday, July 10, 2014….Okay, I’ve just finished watching the graduation speech to the college in the video above by the (I hate to say ‘he-she’ above)… but you know what?
I think whoever termed that phrase got it right. And for a truth they were way ahead of their time when they first started saying it.
Times have gone crazy. Why would you invite a transsexual to be your graduating class main speaker?
Alright, maybe I could see it if the person had done some type of fantastic or earth scattering deed… discovered something (other than he wanted to be a woman and was now pretending to be one). But all this guy does is pull at his very bad weave and talk about himself. I must admit that I have known more than my share of drag queens who loved to do the very same. But nobody paid them ‘x’ amount of dollars or extended an invitation to them to come and be the guest speaker of their class graduation at some college.
I must be missing something. And I am not trying to be funny… but I kind of liked it when we celebrated people for ‘really’ achieving something other than cutting off their penises… or attempting to grow 1. This is sick…truly.
And I know somebody is not going to like it. They will call me homophobic and everything else. And I can live with that.
But what I cannot live with… is me sitting around and being quiet as I watch this world sink into holes it will never ever be able to pull itself out of again. Pandora’s box is open…
One thing about everything when you are growing up. Everything is a joke to you… until it isn’t a joke. Don’t be caught unawares…
Add a comment June 20, 2014
Personally I have never quite understood the hype over Beyonce. I have seen a million and 1 sisters who can look or do look just like her… including 1 of my nieces.
Okay, then you want to say it is the way she can dance.
Please… What is she doing?
Nothing… that she has not copied from some Jamaican gals who have been jingling and shaking their stuff for quite some time now. And on Labor Day in Brooklyn you can catch as many as your eyes can see walking up Empire Blvd doing just that during the Jamaican Liberation Parade.
Empire Blvd becomes a haven of men with their eye bungling out of their heads at a bunch of young and old Jamaican women making their way up the Blvd in a parade shaking every piece of flab they’ve got… and a lot of it you don’t want to see.
Going back to Beyonce… it appears her following has developed into some worshipers… calling Beyonce a ‘deity.’ And they have developed their own church down in Atlanta, called THE NATIONAL CHURCH OF BEY.
If nothing else it should be crystal clear to you by this time that we are truly living in last days and times. And the evolution of Beyonce into a ‘god’ or ‘goddess’ can certainly be looked upon as a clear sign that Satan is busier than ever… and that there are some crazy folks out there.
“We are very disappointed in the failure of the public to recognize the existence of a divine Deity walking among them,” said the church’s founder Pauline John Andrews. This woman must be the supreme witch of the group as she is the founder of such a ludicrous religious start-up group of the Beyonce worshipers. I have heard of die hard fans… but this?
Come on… Why would some woman want to worship any other woman in the way that makes a religious goddess out of her?
Something is definitely wrong with that woman. And undoubtedly Beyonce is getting a charge out of… meaning she is loving it.
How do you become so taken with someone that you want to worship them?
Though I have heard of loving people to death. But this is beyond loving someone… even to that length. To death. Here the woman loves her unto heaven.
Now, how stupid is that?
And from what I hear Beyonce and her hubby are in their own diverse religion… that illuminati mess. Jay-z says he believes in 1 God… but not in hell. He does not believe in Christianity… meaning he does not believe in Jesus. That should speak volumes in of itself to many of you.
But going back to Beyonce… Oh, I have heard it said in movies… when men or women desire someone so much sexually that they will tell someone anything… even that they want to worship them. But before the end of the movie… the worship is all over and so wasn’t all that hot and heavy sexual desire that inspired those words.
I have heard too that Atlanta has a lot of strange things… and things Satanic going on. It can’t be that far behind New York City then… because I know for sure that New York has all kinds of crazy things going on.
I was very surprised 1 night when a very attractive black woman, well attired, very professional looking… walked into Salsa-Soul Sisters and began talking to us about S&M. It wasn’t until she pointed it out that I even noticed that she was dressed in all leather…black all leather… or maybe it was gray. But it was all leather. She called herself ‘1 of the leather people.’
I never knew much about S&M but that night I got a very in-depth lesson of what was supposed to be the ‘joys of being involved in S&M.’ Now, if you can get to that you might be a better person than me. No, a bigger fool than me… because can’t nobody tell me somebody standing over me while I am all handcuffed and tied up…being whipped by that person standing over me… with a whip or beating me with a belt buckle… can give me any joy. No, that you cannot tell me. I know much better than that. And I also knew something that I do not believe that woman ever recognized if she is still alive. And that is… that at any moment 1 of those fools could be subject to torture her to death… but even that thought might have been pleasurious to her.
Evidently, that woman had not processed that thought. For the woman claimed that she got pleasure out of what those S&M people had taught her and done to her. And she said she got mad at her friends because they had waited until she was 50 years old to introduce her to that lifestyle… and it is very much a lifestyle.
That woman also shared with us that night at Salsa-Soul Sisters that there was a restaurant in Manhattan that at a certain time of night shut it doors and locked them… and then the fun (if you care to call it that) began.
I was horrified when she told us that. Who would have ever had thought such a thing.
Full of people who were all into S&M?????
And all waiting on the clock to tick until they all got started on 1 another.
That woman also picked up what looked to me like a notebook jacket… and she pointed out that it bared the S&M flag. They had their own flag… a nation of people unto themselves. Who would have thought it.
It makes you wonder how large could that thing be?
Large as it may be… it was not going to get me. And I appeared to be the only person at Salsa that night who totally rejected anything that woman had said.
I found no part of it interesting or tempting. But some of my fellow Salsa-Soul Sisters did… and I could tell. Some time later… the 1 who had appeared the most interested in it that night… I came across a few years later. She was all dressed up in leather… I knew what course she had chosen.
Then there was another Salsa-Soul Sister who had become part of a religious group in New York called Isis. In fact, a few of the gay sisters I knew got involved in that religion. I recall 1 night this particular sister had given this party over at her home down in Riverside. She was dressed all in white, and as I came in her house I started to reach over to embrace her in greeting her… and she backed away keeping me at a distance without really touching me …talking about she had not yet gone over.
Gone over what???
Later a friend told me that the woman… our Salsa-Soul Sister had gotten involved in this Isis religion and that she was going through some type of purification ritual. Why this woman became involved in that Isis stuff was a mystery to me as she always seem so afro-centric… and also smart. Needless to say I soon began to think of her as anything but smart. She became odd and started acting funny… weird.
This guy… obviously gay… and as gay as he could be… moved into an upstairs apartment in her home. While at work… we later found out… her girlfriend would go upstairs to him. At the party it was pretty obvious that there was something going on between them. She kept dancing all up on him like she was crazy. And later on the woman ran off with this obviously gay man… who was the head of their religious cult.
In looking up that Isis mess… just now… it says that Isis was a goddess of Ancient Egypt and the religion spread through Greco-Rome.
Then not too long ago while listening to the news, I believe, I heard of this church where the congregation went to church nude… totally nude. They worshiped in their church naked. And I had seen on 20/20 or something a while back about some church where they were snake worshipers. They dance and pranced around their church twirling snakes.
While in the library 1 day a young woman came and sat down beside me at a computer. After a small amount of time I noticed that the woman was wiping tears from her eyes. Shortly thereafter I decided I should speak to her to see if I could help. That is when she told me she was running for her life from some religious cult she had fallen into while living in Atlanta. She was all messed up. Jumping at her own shadow… because she was full of fear… saying the cult people wanted to kill her because she wanted out.
So, my point here is this… there are lots of crazy people around the world seeking to worship all kinds of things if somebody is crazy enough to come up with it. And the group of people deciding that Beyonce is holy and should be worshiped is about as crazy as any of them can come… maybe worst. And certainly to me… is as insane as anyone can get who joins them.
And there is 1 thing for sure… somebody may get mad at me for saying it. Because people like to say that we should not condemn others. I do not believe in condemning anyone… and it is not condemning if you speak the truth, particularly if you are attempting to warn them… better yet show them the errors of their ways. However, there are many people who have no problem in condemning themselves to hell… and somebody needs to tell them so.
Therefore, people involved in S&M, Isis, Beyism, Muslim-ism, Buddhism, Hinduism… or any other kind of -ism and everything and anything else that is not like Jesus and God… nor of His doing. They will go straight to hell… and I did not condemn them there… but their acts did.
However, it is not the desire of God that any of us should be lost. But due to foolishness most people will be lost. I pray you won’t … or me. But how are you going to turn a woman into a god and become a worshiper of her… and not think that something is wrong with you… is my question?
Beyonce cannot do anything for anyone… like heal someone… save someone from hurt… harm or danger… illness… disease… or any kind of enemy including the devil. In fact, she is in as much of a need God as we all are. And I hope she and her worshipers find Him before it is too late.
My Lord… have mercy.
Then I happened to catch a video segment from the MaryMary reality TV show where the 2 sisters, Erica and Tina… are having a ‘for real’ conversation. Somebody should have called for the cameras to be cut off. Because the words started flying ‘God-Dang’ world??? Erica got beeped… who knows what she said. And I am not trying to figured it out… or even read lips.
We have all heard that the gospel world is not what we all thought or think that it should be when it comes to the language and behavior of some of the people walking around saying they love the Lord… singing gospel music… and that live lives that speak something totally else.
One of the worst things that could have happened to some of these people is reality TV. They don’t know how to stay off of it. Stuff slips… and everybody sees or hears something that wasn’t supposed to be seen… or heard… or hinted at. Then again drama sells… and keeps the ratings coming.
One of the biggest disasters is that boy… Deitrick Haddon. Nobody can tell me he is really saved. Somebody is going to be mad cause I called him a ‘boy.’ Don’t send me any more comments professing to me about how cruel and ungodly I am… and how much of a man of God Deitrick is.
That boy is not saved and not trying to be. If I wasn’t much of a lady I would post a picture of his lower half which evidently he is very proud of. The internet is loaded with pictures of the boy’s penis… and he didn’t release that picture or those pictures some 10 or 20 years ago. No, it was while he was supposed to be ‘Saved’… while he was a recognized gospel artist… while he was still married to 1 woman while showing his stuff to another …or who knows how many others. And all this I guess while he had taken over the leadership of his father’s church upon the passing of his father. I suspect those people must have put him out… and he deserved it.
We are living in a time when some folks have figured out how to get more exposure… any kind and any way they can. They make sex tapes… send out instagrams of pictures they claim they didn’t send… or this they get arrested or shoplifting or while driving drunk etc.. It worked for Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Brandy’s little brother, Lil’ Kim, R. Kelly, Puff Daddy and the list goes on and on…
You cannot tell me that if you are a recording artist or a movie star or a wanna-be that you have not figured out that sending pictures of your naked sexual organs or videotaping yourself involved in some sexual act… that you don’t know it won’t find its way to the public eye. It has happened far to many times for anybody to do it… and not do it with the intention that it is going to viral… where everybody and their brother and mother is going to see it.
Some do it to revive a fading career. Others to jump start a career in the spotlight… news… or gain a reality show etc…
When my son told me this story I was on my way to St. Louis… and he mentioned to me how this gospel singer by the name of Kevin Terry had a videotape leaked with him down on his knees… and he wasn’t praying. But giving some man a blow job. I never saw the video but while in St. Louis I mentioned it a couple of times… and I know for sure that others saw it.
This Kevin had ties with our boy Deitrick whom I do believe has some issues in the same department. I often realize something that goes over the top of the heads of most other people.
What I have realized is this… that a lot of time you will find men on the down-low who appear to be crazy about women. That is because that is what they want you to believe. They act like they want to sex down everything but the tree when it comes to women… while all the while hiding what they really like and with who. It is a game that they play to throw people off from thinking that they are really gay.
I know I’m going to get some comments about this… but so be it. I really do get tired of these so-called gospel ‘I love Jesus’ artists… who are more sinful that Joe Small out on the street corner selling drugs… or pimping girls or whatever. They have a semblance of holiness… but they are not holy. And I don’t care how many gospel songs they write …or sing.
And I get tired of people trying to make saints out Steve Harvey and Tyler Perry. Come on now…
Have you heard how Steve curses?
There has got to be a line… some kind of a line somewhere.
Why does everyone want to make people holy just cause they like them… or they find them to be funny… or they write Jesus into their plays… or tell church jokes from time to time?
I do not hate either Steve or Tyler. And I would never be jealous of anyone’s success… but in the same token success does not mean ‘godly’ just because they are successful… and happen to utter the word ‘God’ once or twice.
I have a cousin who totally blew me off when I told her I was not really a fan of Tyler Perry’s plays or movies etc. They were something I just was not interested in. Boy, did she call me everything but a child of God. She said I was bourgeoisie… I was a hater… and I was this… and I was that.
Man, what did I do?
I am sure that I have work that Tyler won’t like either. But it would not mean he hated me. Needless to say I have not talked to that cousin since. Not because she said all of what she said regarding Tyler… but because she called me ‘light.’ I don’t want or like people to call me ‘light.’ I hate it… and I am not really ‘light’… I am brown… black through and through. But let me go back to my blog topic….
The Bible tells us that we have to ‘put off the old man.’ We become brand new. Our language is new… how we dress is new… how we walk and talk is new…. how we think and behave is new. Many of these so-called people… many pastors and bishops… evangelists etc. included they have not lost that old man… he’s in the closet and peers out when the coast is clear. And they do what they do… believing nobody is going to find out… until somebody lets the cat out of the bag.
You can’t condemn someone who condemns them-self. The Bible tells us to judge them by their fruits. I would not believe that would be in the Bible if we are to be blind by the ways and the wills… and ways of people.
I am not gay bashing as that would be ridiculous for me to do… having come out of ‘the life’ myself. Though I hear we can be some of the biggest critics of it. But I would not do that. Least way I hope that I would not… even if I hadn’t come out of ‘the life.’
But I really think that my thoughts today come out of me recently coming in contact with someone who supposedly is in the church but living or trying to live his life as a woman.
Yes, I did say… trying to live his life as a woman in the church. The guy looks some what like a woman to most people I guess. But I noticed right off that something was out of sync about him. No matter how much they try whether it be the arms… the adam’s apple or their legs… body structure or something else… No one can truly wipe away totally who they really are.
And let me just say here and now before I forget it… our God does not make mistakes.
Evidently, this guy had taken the pills…not the 1 in this picture but the 1 that I am talking about having just met. His voice sounds very much like a woman and if you didn’t notice certain things about him… he could easily past as woman to most people hands down. But I came out of ‘the life’ so I would be subject to pick up on certain things that most people simply do not catch… as I had come to know a lot of gay guys… many of whom were my friends. I know them for the most part to be highly fantastic people… highly creative… kind and giving… so not so kind… but many of them loving the Lord.
What I do not like though is this… it is about the kind of people who move far away from home so people won’t know who they are and can’t recognize them as being so-and so’s son or daughter. They assume another life and identity as whatever role they are playing… be it either a man or a woman… walking around tricking …or a better word ‘fooling’ people. Or attempting to fool people. No, I do not like this kind of people… at all.
They have eaten up all these pills to either make themselves look and sound like either a man or a woman. And some of them have gone the distance and gotten the operation… removing their breast or male gentiles… growing breast or facial hair etc….
What also disturbs me about this… and perhaps the most. It is this… the fact that it is all a lie. It also undermines God perfect order. And it is highly deceitful when people walk around pretending to be something that they know they are really not… but look and sound every bit like it to unsuspecting people whom they charm into their lives …and never inform the truth… unless somehow forced to.
I foresee a time when many will be marrying such people unaware. There have past cases where someone found out that either their husband or wife was not really a man… or a woman. I even read not long ago of a case where a woman found out that her husband had really been her father. The world truly has gone crazy. And everything is turning upside down.
I recently was hired for a job… and from the jump I recognized immediately that the person introduced to me as a woman… was not a woman. It is from that moment I think I was going to write this blog regarding this subject. Because it bothered me.
I cannot lie and call someone a woman when I know that they are a man. I do not want to hurt anyone’s feelings. But to tell you the truth I would rather not come in contact with them.
Yes, back in the day I used to do it. I used to say ‘hey, girl’…when I was hanging out to the gay guys… and play that game with them. But I’m not that person today… or any more. I don’t want to play that game. And I just don’t want to lie… or aid or abet them in that lifestyle.
A lot of people do it. They grin and smile all up in their faces (meaning the gay guys faces) …while ripping them apart when they are among their other friends… laughing and making jokes about them. I have seen it. And I might have done that myself… I think.
But these people (and I do not say ‘these people’ to demean anyone)… who live these kind of lives trying to fool people are truly ‘double-minded.’ Their mind is split… they are biologically whatever they were born… and then they are whatever they are pretending to be. Over a period time yes… much because natural but still the core of who they really are cannot be removed by doctor… by pills… by surgery… or anything… unless God does it. And we all know that He is not.
But what bothered me most about my meeting and supposedly working with this person… was that I knew them to be a liar from the very beginning. You cannot be passing yourself off as something you know that you are not… and not be a liar. If you would lie to me about a core thing such as who you were born to be… then how can I trust you regarding anything else?
And that was the dilemma I was thrown into.
And I just could not do it… because I knew the person could not be trusted… because he was definitely not a woman.
You cannot trust anyone who would introduce himself to men as a woman… with all the parts…having gone through the surgery… as though they were born that way.
I am not going to go to hell aiding someone in their lying by holding up their lie pretending like it is the truth. No, I cannot do it. But the people who brought us together… church folk… were and did do just that. And I really could not understand it.
If there is 1 thing that I clearly understand… I understand that homosexuality is a spirit. Now, I know many would disagree… and that is alright. I will not argue the point. But homosexuality is as much a spirit as lying can be on some people who will tell you a lie even when there is nothing to lie about. Or as the spirit of drinking strong drink… or taking drugs. The measure of a spirit is this… how they talk… walk… act out.
All people under the influence of alcohol slur… walk drifting from side to side or show some sign of being unstable on their legs… and can be funnier than usual or more argumentative or mean depending upon the spirit that has a hold of them. The same is true with the spirit of homosexuality… their is a likeness in their mannerisms… hand movements… the way they talk etc. Even with the women they take on similar characteristics…looks… mannerisms etc…. these traits are a mark of the spirit that is within them. Some may say ‘I don’t have any gay mannerisms.’ Oh, yes they do… but they are not readily picked up by all people who don’t know what they are. Because there are many gay people who pride themselves on being ‘invisible’... meaning they think nobody can tell that they are gay.
So, all sins are a spirit of 1 sort or another. And if I were to hold up 1 sin or another I would be as bad as the people who doing that sin.
So, there are things I prefer not to become involved in… or with. I can’t hold up a lie no matter how much I like you or may love you. I would be contributing to the sin if I did… and I cannot do that. That would make me a liar. And lying is definitely as sin. Should I lose my soul for the sank of holding up someone else’s sin by playing their game and introducing them as a woman when I know they are a man?
No, I cannot do that. It does not mean I hate them. It just means I can’t play the devil’s game. And I will not be drawn into it… whether I like you or not.
It amazes me all the tricks the devil will play upon us. The people who go through that thing they call ‘transitioning’ can get driver’s licenses that say whatever they change their new sex to. Further evidence of a highly deceitful game. And it is a game.
I feel sorry for anyone who believes that they were born the wrong sex. I know that they are confused. But they do not realize who has confused them. Then others support that confusion by calling them ‘girl’ or ‘boy.’
I know devil to be a liar… and I am well aware of the tricks he can play on the mind… and it is a head game. But I know someone who can remove the confusion and turn everything around… and make it right side up again. His name is Jesus.
And I am not preaching… because preaching to the lost does them no good. They are lost. They have eyes but they cannot see… and ears but they cannot hear. Until God removes the blinders and they step into his marvelous light… then they will come to see and understand how they were deceived. It happened to me. I know first-hand. And I thank the Lord for Saving me… but it might not have happened if the church where God lead me had realized who I was at the time and what kind of spirit had a hold of me.
The problem is many churches… particularly African American churches chase out gay people… when God has called them in. The Bible says that faith comes through hearing… and then it says ‘with love and kindness have I drawn thee.’ We must show love and compassion in our churches… and stop acting like none of us were ever in sin, or may still be as the case usually is.
Most church people won’t even testify about what God Saved them from. But God did not give us a testimony for us to keep it to ourselves. It is of none effect if we keep what God has done for us to ourselves. It is to us His glory for us to share it.
I am thankful that God brought me out of lesbianism… and I will share it everywhere I go… along with all of His other goodness to me. I am not shame that God lifted me up… and now I walk in liberty.
Well, God bless…. I’ve got to get busy now and do what I really came into this computer lab to do. I said a bit more in this blog than I intended to. Hope it is a blessing to you…
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2014
36 comments April 15, 2014
And guess what?
I still don’t know who she is. I am not really all into the music scene like I used to be. Somebody says ‘concert’ to me I look the other way say, ‘Oh, I can’t stand the noise.’
Well, I’ve gotten older.
But she… this Diana King does kindda looks familiar to me for some reason… but I don’t know how. I think because she reminds me of this lady who rides the bus… they look similar.
I gave up listening to the radio for the most part years ago. Because when I listen to radio I am literally working. When you come from an industry you view everything within the eyes of that industry.
So, when I hear radio… I see the disc jockey… radio announcer (as I like to be called if you have to call me at all)… or DJ… Well, I hear everything you don’t… I hear the segways… the music mixes… their voice… what they say… in ways that a regular normal listener doesn’t. And the same thing happens to me when I go see a movie.
A movie has to be very good in order to draw me into the storyline within the first few minutes of its beginning… other than that I’m looking at how a scene was lit… the camera angle… the type of shot …the sound effects and audio mix down etc..etc…etc..
So, I guess you get the point. I am a professional… and as a professional in these industries we just hear it and see it very different from lay people.
So, this Diana King… at first I thought it was Oprah’s friend. Because you know the rumors about her and her friend. So, I thought it was Gail and not ‘Diana’ King at first that people were trying to find out more about. And I was thinking that maybe they had discovered that Gail ‘really’ was a lesbian. But… the search was for this woman Diana… I got the names twisted.
Apparently popular in the reggae world, Diana is a dance hall girl. I guess that means she shaked a lot of her back side. And ‘yes’ if you were 1 of those looking, Diana did recently come out as being gay.
Personally, with that tattoo in the middle of her forehead she looks satanic to me. And she looks much older than her girlfriend.
Which means nothing to me… because I am not familiar with her. But I will tell you that I was slightly surprised about Robin Roberts from the ‘Good Morning America’ Show coming out. I never quite thought that about her… not that it really matters what I thought.
Oh, I knew she had once been a basketball player and all that… and many of the women in the league are gay. But I never thought it about Robin. But she too recently came out… having been with her lover for the past 10 years.
Though I must say… I was a wee bit taken back when my girl Cheryl Swoops left her husband and married her girlfriend some few years back. To me Cheryl had to have been the all time best female basketball player of all times. I think she is coaching now. But my goodness what a player she was…
I know you are probably waiting for me to begin 1 of my stories about having been ‘in the life‘… gay some years ago. Well, I don’t think I’m going to say much on it today. Except I had… but thank goodness I am now redeemed. And I am so glad about it.
Thank goodness God desired me… even when I wasn’t thinking about Him.
It amazes me how many comments I have gotten over Deitrick. These women sound like they hate me.
What have I done?
Deitrick doesn’t need me to do him in… he is doing a fine job of it for himself. He appears to be someone who will do whatever it takes to get you some exposure… good or bad. Nobody takes nude pictures and sends them to someone without believing they may show up somewhere.
Can’t believe Deitrick stuff is all over the internet… if it really is his. This whole Hollywood thing of exposing yourself or some video of you having sex is making me sick.
And that formula works. These people exactly get deals… and contracts behind doing indecent things.
Who ever heard of that Kardashen woman until that nasty video?
Just heard that Serena Williams just beat another victim on the tennis court. The girl is too fierce… as Patti LaBelle would say.
I think it is marvelous the depth and width of her ability to do what she does… even when she is not feeling 100 … or the ‘nay’ sayers count her out. And that is when both she and Venus really show them what they are made of.
Serena keeps racking up the wins.. demolishing the records and still can’t get the endorsement deals. I wish I owned some major corporation… because she would definitely be my spokes woman. But those people won’t do it.
Well, I have over spent my time… time for me to get up out here now….
It has started to rain. A refreshing change to saying ‘it snowing now.’
My phone dropped and broke. The store had me call these claim people for a new phone. They told me that they didn’t have my phone in stock so they were going to up grade me to the Samsung Note 3?
But you know what I really liked my phone. And particularly after I went and checked on the cost of my phone… which the woman told me was 3 hundred and something… and this new up-grade was 6 hundred and something.
Yeah, but I really like my phone… especially since the woman told me that I would have pay a $150 for this new phone. I had forgotten I had only paid $50 for mines. And guess what… when I went back to the store that phone was still $50. Forget the deductible… I want my old phone because the way I see it… those claims people are charging 3 times as much to replace it. When I can just walk into the store and buy it again at the $50 price.
Forget the deductible… I know when I am coming out ahead.
So, I have been trying to reach these claim people. And guess what?
They won’t answer.
Well, God bless…. hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2014
Add a comment March 29, 2014
Now, all of this from an ex-lesbian myself… and a person who has a friend who is FOREVER telling me how I think everybody is gay. Well, this story proves that to be wrong. Because I just cannot believe that Raven Symone is actually gay.
Maybe she is just going through a phase. All kids go through them… even me. And perhaps even you did too.
“A phase’… a time in our life when we tried different things then moved on.
Raven might well argue this point. But time will tell.
Supposedly involved in love relationship… or sexual relationship… Raven is said to be entangled with this woman… some ‘the next top model’ woman.
Now 27 Raven clearly at this point is supposed to be a grown woman. Least ways that is the supposed experts say. But I ask you-
At 27 were you really all that grown?
I wasn’t. And that is for sure.
It was not until I was 25 that I actually branched out and started to become sexually involved. I know… I know. I was late. But up until that point I was pretty much in Church with my parents. Well… not quite. I had stopped going to church though… but had to move out first before I could. But I had not yet hit the clubs or anything like it until a few months after I turned 25… a couple of years out of college.
This is when I started frequenting clubs… if you care to call it that. Because I really didn’t frequent clubs… and I was never a bar person because I simply did not drink… and wasn’t going to try. And I totally hated bars… and the kind of people who sat in them drinking most of their nights away.
In fact, when I did start going out it was to disco clubs… and yes they were gay… in New York… and Manhattan to be exact. And I only liked clubs with all women… primarily black women. So, that limited the places where I went. These were places like ‘Bonnie & Clyde’s’… ‘Shahara,’ which was kind of mixed but up-scale… etc. I liked up-scale… but mostly went to ‘Bonnie & Clyde’s’ because they had more black women. In fact, they were all mostly black… mostly Afro-centric.
But as I have stated in my previous blog,s in which I have wrote on this subject on being gay… or lesbian… and/or lesbianism. Since I was in media… a professional radio announcer… I was undercover, as most people were in my time. And during my time… when I was young being ‘out’ really wasn’t the ‘in-thing’ to do.
To tell you the truth ‘outing’ yourself… or coming out of the closet… really is a evolving thing. Though many people are now coming ‘out’ the masses, I would say have not. There are many who feel it would hurt their image… their businesses… their law practices… their family relationships… etc…etc..
So, as they call it today… I had to be on the down-low. Which I guess Raven is claiming to have been.. until now. Since she recently twitted that she is gay and can now get married… though she says she has not immediate plans to do so.
I never really hung out in town… rarely, and never became involved with anyone in my hometown. Which really was not by plan or design… it just ended up being that way. Because when I could not get to New York… I partied in a nearby town that had tons of black women who were very attractive… upwardly mobile and were ‘in the life.’ I did that until something happened with the Warehouse… it closed down. And then I discovered the wonders of New York City… and I do wonders.
I was 25 and the world was my playground. At those early ages of your young adulthood… you really are just trying to find yourself.
But going back to Raven. Having been removed from that life by some years now… and with no desire or intentions to ever go back into it… I always become sadden when I hear … read or see young girls who have gravitated towards a gay lifestyle. You see them everywhere today… and it is not hard to tell them either. And some of them appear to be quite young.
I know many who will not agree with me on this… and some will even get mad. But that is okay… get mad. And I really do not care who does or does not agree with me.
You cannot expect to be happy when you are living outside of the will of God.
There were, of course, numerous times I felt that I was quite happy while I was doing my thing ‘in the life’… that is what we called it then… besides saying ‘I’m gay’ or ‘I’m a lesbian.’ You would just say ‘I’m in the life.’
But way down deep I was not happy. I do realize that now… but didn’t then. And I am not saying that people cannot or are not lonely… unhappy… or do not shed tears in heterosexual life, or any other lifestyle. But therein lies the problem.
When you live in a world that you define yourself by your sexual preference… then this means you are living to satisfy your sexual being. In Church they call it being ‘carnal.’
I can clearly say that while I was in that life… sex had a hold of me. And when I was loosed from the bondage of being gay… a lesbian… and released from desiring sex during great periods of my waking time… I cannot tell you how happy I have come to be free of it all.
I now know real happiness… and have a freedom that I just cannot explain. When I didn’t have a lover while I was in that life… man… It was all I craved. That is because I was caught up in the sex. Sex had a hold of me. It controlled me. Not in the way that I just did anything… or went to bed with just anybody.
Today, I do not live defining myself sexually. There is no need.
Why would I want to?
My life is not defined sexually. I am greater than being just a sexual being. Sex no longer has its control over me. I am free. And I walk in liberty.
A very beautiful young lady, Raven is very much grown up… and definitely seems to have her head on in the right place, and clearly very much unlike most Hollywood types. It is my hope that if Raven Symone really is gay… and I say ‘if’ because a lot of women… and young girls try it. For some it is nu-vogue… the thing to do. To walk around telling people that they have a ‘girl-friend.’ It is kind of a hip thing for them.
But if Raven is… I hope that it is merely just a stage in her life. A stage that she will soon get over… and move on from it without too much pain. And that she is fortunate enough to be discovered by a wonderful man… who will love her… become her husband, and the father to her children.
Well, I have said it. Now, I guess I am going to hear from a lot of people who may disagree. But that is okay… I love hearing from you all… whether we are in agreeance of not.
Well, God bless… I’m waiting on my son now who is suppose to be coming to pick me up. So, let me just say quickly… I hope you have a beautiful rest of the week.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2013
Add a comment August 7, 2013
It is baffling to me the times we now live in… and just how we happened to get here????
They are… the times we are now living in… they are strange and seem so foreign to me. The sickness of the crimes… the extreme insanity… and cruelity that seems to be abounding in these times.
Who ever before ever heard of women ripping unborn babies out the bellies of pregnant women for the purpose of stealing their children?
To read story… after story… Well, to find headline after headline of such is frightening to me. Not frightening in that I am afraid it will happen to me… because I am not pregnant. And doubt that I will be ever again.
But frightening in that such things are happening to anyone.
But how insane can you get to prepetrate such a cruel act upon another woman?
Or any acts of crime and/or crimes upon anyone?
I have not particularly cared for a lot of people. Well, not so many as that. It is really not my nature to distain people. And certainly if for some reason I should… to let it mount up in me turning into some kind of twisted wackco thang. No. I think not. I have neither the time or energy… to linger there in those kinds of deep and dark places in my mind. I am much too busy.
But for those where perhaps I might have found some kind of fault in… I have never thought about taking out or enacting any type of criminal act against them. Though I must admit to picking up a baseball bat or 2… Okay, maybe 3 or 4… Oh, alright… maybe 5 or 6 times… just to get my thought through …or to go after somebody. But that was all before I became saved. And never without due cause.
But I have never looked upon any woman… pregnant or otherwise …and wished that I was her… or that I had her baby. And then came up with a plan to replace her… or to steal her unborn… or born child. But people have. Some people have.
They truly and really have.
People try to pretend to be other people… and all kinds of craziness.
There was this guy in New York City who killed an elderly man, so that he could take his apartment and live in it. He also was living off the man’s social socurity… until they caught up with him.
But it goes beyond being sick… or insane… or being just plain crazy.
While these predators go around for the most part pretending to have given birth to the infant… if it survives… that they had illegally taken…while committing murder in order to obtain it.
Who would do this kind of thing???????
Who thinks up this kind of stuff????
Though clearly they all look like fruit cakes… and perhaps I should not slander fruit cakes in such a way. Because I used to kind of like them.
But who does this??????
And they are women of all colors, types, body sizes, come from different states, countries etc… etc… etc… And now they vary in ages as well. A 14 and 13 years did the exact same thing.
They take the baby from the belly of another woman in order to pretend that they had given birth to the baby. A baby that they either lost some how by mis-carriage or whatever. Or they never were pregnant with in the first place. So, they took the infant from the mother’s womb… so they could- Now, get this… let me say this slowly…
I cannot go any further with this.
Because if the truth be told there are some things which I just do not have any patience with. There are times that I think tax-payer’s money should not be wasted on. There are lots of ways tax-payers would be better served by the tax dollars taken out of each and every pay check, then by paying for cases like these that really do not warrant trials.
I know… I know…it would open the door to many of us being locked away for no cause at all. Because the system itself needs correction. BUT…
When you think about the economy… about the millions upon millions upon millions of people out of work… who could use another extension to their unemployment benefits …or whatever have you. There are plenty of places where money could go that would really serve some type of legitimate societal interest. But not the paying of lawyers and court costs for people like these women, in these cases cutting up women to steal unborn infants from their mother’s womb.
What would be their defense?
What defense could they have?
“I was crazy.”
We do not need to waste valuble court time to hear that.
And we have not even began to talk about the health issues that may surround the infants… or the lives and outcome of the murdered women’s other children, and family members if she had any.
Perhaps, it doesn’t sound Christian like to you… and I am a Christian.
I love the Lord… and He loves me. But in Biblical text we are informed to not lust after our neighbors possessions… it is called coveteness. Or to not envy them…that is coveteness too… and to do right by all men. And that ”thou shalt not kill.” Or “steal.”
So, I do not advocate killing such people… but I do believe they should be locked away. And kept away forever.
When I went up to read a story on 1 woman cutting a woman and stealing her infant, I in my wildest imagination never expected to see a listing of stories…one after another of simular acts.
I recall when I read the first story of this nature. It was some maybe 6 or 7 years ago.
The story centered around 2 women who had met over the internet… Craiglist or myspace ….or something like it.
One of the women was pregnant and the other woman befriended her. Over a period of time as their friendship grew… I guess… the pregnant woman gave the other woman her address. Whereupon near the time of pregnant woman’s delivery date for the birth of her child, the other woman went to whatever state where the pregnant woman lived and performed surgery upon the pregnant woman, killing her and removing the unborn infant from her body.
That was the very first time I had ever heard of that kind of story. So, it was a shock for me to find story after story after story… of women in various states all having done the same exact thing since that initial story.
This copy-cat thing is ridiculous. And the only way to deal with such things is to deal harshly with people who commit them.
But because the mind of people today is so warped the news sources should not divulge so much information about certain kinds of heinous crimes.
Also, I was grossly turned off by that reality show that showed doctors actually performing surgeries. Don’t know whether or not it still comes on… but is the need?
Who really needs to watch shows like that?
Or do our children really need video games that depict people realistically being blown apart, or shot to death, or cut up etc… etc…?
What are we developing here?????
One can clearly state that there is little reason for why the times are as they are today. Truly. There are a bunch of heartness conscienceless people walking around today. And we have only ourselves to blame… because of what we allow either in our homes via the television …or via our children’s video games… or in the movies on the big screen… or in the magazines… or whatever else and wherever else people consume negative images whether it be through music, or music videos, as well… we allow it.
It is amazing to me the things that people will get up and go marching against… such as same sex-marriages. Something which may never affect them, their family or anyone that they know. But they will picket against it…. vote against any politican remotely in favor of it, they will form rallies and bus trips to go to capitol statehouses. But they say nothing about what is allowed to strem into their homes, on their radios… through out their movies or even from page to page of the magazines put out form our consumption.
Whether Bobby marries Bobby or not is not anything that really deal with any of us personally. But the impact of what comes across the airwaves of our televisions and radios… and what is printed in our books and magazines, and movies does. And it can be harmful… hurtful… and can produce and inspire all kinds of criminal and violent acts.
We said nothing to the 10 Commanments being removed from Courtroom halls and buildings. We said nothing really about prayer being removed from schools… or the conversation of removing ‘In God we trust’ off of our currency.
When will we say something to something that really counts, is the question?
When will we ceased to be tossed to and fro with every whim like mindless and blind puppets?
There are a lot of things that should be challenged… and that serve no useful social purpose. Such as television shows that show people actually getting cut up during surgeries. And then we wonder why there suddenly is a rash of people out there using surgerical techniques while perpetrating various crimes.
It seems that there are those who have been voted into political office who think not about those whom they vowed to represent… but entered into the arena of politics so that they could establish some kind of name for themselves.
They consider not the needs of those whom they are vowed to serve and represent… whether or not they voted them in or not.
When 1 goes into political office it not for a chosen few… but for the masses of which they are said to be over their district… ward or whatever have you.
That being said…
“Why would any politican in his right mind vote down a plan that could possibly put millions back to work?”
Politics. That is the reason why.
There is no good reason behind hindering a bill that would put people to work rebuilding the infrastructure of this country. Clearly, it is a plan that could not fail… because bascially it calls for a lot of manual labor. As opposed to a bunch of computers or robots doing the work.
In a vote of 50 to 49 Obama’s Job Bill was defeated in the U.S. Senate. Every single Republican voted against the bill… inclusive of 2 turn-coat Democrats, Ben Nelson, Nebraska, and Jon Tester, Montana. The Jobs Bill needed 60 Senators to vote in favor of it in order for it to pass… to begin the process of putting thousands of Americans back onto the work rolls again.
There are people who do a lot of clicking and clacking… mostly because they want attention. Almost all of the Tea Party people can be classified as clickers and clackers. They only want some attention. Perhaps, they even have visions of themselves rising up out of the ranks to become some kind of major political player… or the next Barack Obama. Though they would never say that.
But they click and clack… posture… and pose… and never do anything for anyone. Because they can’t see beyond their own nose and selfish political goals.
The Jobs Bill needed to be passed. Not for the sake of Washington… but for the sake of the millions who have been out work …and can’t seem to find any solutions to their non-working dilemmas. They have been looking… but there is nothing out there.
Wouldn’t any bill that created any amount of substantials jobs been better than nothing?
To the people without 1 it would. But to a bunch of politicans who already have it made in the shade… quasi professions …politicans made up of lawyers… and now some doctors and businessmen… what do they have to worry about?
Their families are fed. Their bills are all being paid. They don’t have to worry about adequate health care… and they’veall got a job… supposedly representing you and me.
Every which way President Barack Obama has tried to re-boot this economy… and to get it in gear and restart it… along comes a bunch of Republican Politicans who would rather sabotage the President… rather than aid in helping America out of a dilemma that a former President… a Republican like themselves… put us all in.
A man who was a known and proven liar… yet nobody ever called him ‘liar.’ Yet, that word has been thrown at President Obama by so many Republicans… it makes you wonder what planet were they on while George W. Bush was sitting in the White House as President of the United States?
Well, God bless… and enjoy the rest of your week. How quickly these days are rolling by. We are mid-way through October already. Soon the rain drops in this picture will be replace by snow flakes. A welcome change… just hope that when it comes it won’t be too cold.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2011
1 comment October 14, 2011
I have never thought much of Arnold Schwarzenegger since a controversy once arose about him being a racist. I have since forgotten the details… but I think it had to do with him not hiring minorities within his staff, as governor of California. Or maybe it was something to do with him not having any minorities in his movies.
Through the course of living we have grown accustom to reading and hearing stories of men and women who have fallen down… who were living double lives and baring children with people outside of their vows of matrimony. So, this story about Arnold Schwarzenegger really shouldn’t be a great surprise. He is afterall… a man.
Don’t you hate hearing that?
“Well, he’s just doing what men do.”
“All men do it.”
“Maybe he wasn’t getting any at home.”
And the list goes on and on… as to the kinds of things people will say.
But sometimes we are caught off guard. People who we never would have suspected… though I would never classify Arnold as 1 of those as there had been rumors. Things about him groping and feeling up on women. But there were people like for instance… John Edwards. Even watching that mess unfold while standing at the counter of a local corner store… I just could not believe it. Not him was all I kept saying. Not goody 2-shoes… squeaky clean John Edwards. The John Edwards who said-
“I’m in love with my childhood sweetheart… that John Edwards?”
Then before him… there rose up Jesse Jackson. What a fine dude he was in his day. And I do mean fine.
He was the 1 that all the networks turned to concerning ‘black issues.’ He was a man for all season when it came to… his peoples…
Up to the point where he called Obama the ‘N’ word. But let’s go back before that… to those pictures displayed upon the front page of the New York Post and everywhere else… of Jesse… and ‘the’ woman… the very pregnant woman …carrying his ‘love’ child… who at the time that story broke… she had already had the baby. That was the picture with him and Bill Clinton…another 1… and her just grinning like there was not going to be a tomorrow for any of them.
Yes…the ‘right’ Reverend Jesse Jackson. Needless to say that controversy certainly changed a lot of people’s opinion about him… and what he truly represented. Which as already mentioned… was compounded by that little incident with him talking off camera with an open mic on… talking some crazy stuff about what he would like to do to Obama while referencing him with the ‘N’ word.
Clearly, if I had been Jesse’s wife… and I have said it over and over… since seeing that 1 picture in the New York Post. The 1 with the woman being 7 or 8 months pregnant with Jesse standing… I think behind her… grinning from ear to ear with his hands stretch around her inflated belly.
Oh, yeah… I would have been just like Morgan Freeman’s wife, and got me 1 of those high power lawyers. And he would have been seeing stars for the rest of life… after I got through with him. He would have been too dizzy to ever walk up onto any stage ever again… when I got through with him. But I guess Jesse’s wife is kinder… gentler… and more forgiving than I am.
But some women when they have had enough… they truly have had enough. And Morgan Freeman’s wife was 1 of those women.
One could argue… what was he thinking?
Maybe it was a lapse in judgment.
But for how many years did he suffer that lapse?
I am talking about Schwarzenegger now. What could he have been thinking? And to be doing it with someone who worked within his own house. Who was impregnated with his child at about the exact same time as his wife with their last child.
And who allowed the other woman… a maid to bring that child into the house of his wife… where this little boy probably played with his other son… the 1 born about the same time as the child he fathered with the maid… a woman who worked for his wife… aiding Maria around the house… and probably with her children as well.
Is this a confusing story?
Obviously, not. It did not seem to confuse Arnold at all. Because some how during the course of the last 10 to 13 years… the span of the life and birth of his outside son… he never slipped up. That is Maria Striver claims to have never known about the child before Arnold finally told her about him some weeks ago. Whereupon, she packed up and moved out… taking her children with her.
Not to be or seem evil… but I never thought the Striver/Schwarzenegger marriage was a good match. And it goes beyond him being Republican… and her being deeply rooted as a Democrat.
It just seemed to me that Arnold Schwarzenegger had a need to legitimize himself. Coming from Austria… and having a funny last name… combined with a funny and then quite thick accent… as well as… I guess he had some political ambitions. What better way to create for himself the type of American acceptance that he might not have ever gotten any other way than by marrying a Kennedy.
In seeing a picture of the woman… 1 would have to wonder what did Arnold see in her. She appears to be older than Maria… and I don’t know what she looked like some 20 years ago when she started working for the Schwarzenegger family… but that is all gone now. But then I thought that about the woman John Edwards impregnated… and about Marla Maples or Naples…or whatever her name was. The woman who Donald Trump took up with… and soon married. She probably was pregnant too… because that whole thang happened pretty quick. And soon it was over.
They snub their noses at those who do not have the money that they do… or who do not live quite as well off as they do. I’m talking about the supposed ‘high class’ who talk about… ‘all they do is make babies.’ But when push comes to shove they themselves are about as ‘ghetto fabulous’ as those they often look down upon. And they have far less class in the dealings of their own infidelity… than those they shun.
Though now nearing the end of his term as a governor, I have no doubt… Arnold felt it now safe to disclose his little secret. However, what men do not take into account is how women feel about men who cheat. And particularly if they not only cheat …but also make someone pregnant in the process of their cheating. And don’t let them walk around for years like they had not done anything… pretending.
But Arnold was so bold… he got the woman pregnant and then decided he wanted to be governor too. That is about just as bad as John Edwards deciding to run for President of the United States a second time… while his wife is dying of cancer… and his mistress was pregnant.
And to put the icing upon the cake for Arnold… it was all done within the preview of his wife and children. Right there under their own noses.
This is why I will never be able to stand that little guy… Woody Allen. I will never support him or anything that he does. To think that Mia Farrow adopted some children… and during the course of some time… he began taking lewd and questionable pictures of the then quite young girl… whom he later divorces Mia Farrow for… so that he could marry her.
What kind of craziness was that?
Clearly, the man had… and has problems. And I for 1 do no sanction them.
Another rat was… or is… that Rudolph Giuliani. Yeah, that guy from New York City who used to be the Mayor…then ran for President… and might try to run again. But he will never make it. Because women do not forget.
Giuliani… when he was Mayor of New York started seeing this women. This woman… he would bring to Gracie Mansion… the Mayor’s place of residence. in New York. This mind you was where his wife and his son lived. And Giuliani… the good mayor… would have this woman staying there with him… under the same roof with his wife and child.
What kind of a dog is that?
At least in the ghetto… most men know not to try that. If the woman doesn’t have an apartment of her own… then they know how to find a cheap motel or hotel. But ain’t nobody in the ghetto going to pull up to his wife’s house talking about he going to bring some other woman… in there to do his thing. Huh-uh… that ain’t happening… ever. Not with the wife knowing about it… it is not. Definitely not.
You have got to be kidding. And I am not joking about this… as this type of behavior is not acceptable. It is immoral …and it can be traced throughout history. Infidelity is not new… you only have to go back a few years to Bill Clinton and his little 24-year-old friend… named Monica.
It would seem that wedding vows do not mean very much today. Maybe never… as long as men and women have allowed themselves to become enticed sexually outside of their marriages.
Through the course of the 20 years that woman who worked in the Schwarzenegger household was taken care of by Schwarzenegger. Who knows maybe Schwarzenegger placed her there… got her the job in his home in the first place?
But upon retiring from her job as a maid for the Schwarzenegger… he bought the woman a nearly $300,000 house in an exclusive LA residence. And it also looks like he paid for her to have a boob job as well. Because in her pictures she clearly looks like she had 1. It does not look natural.
The 1 thing about outside of a marriage children… it is funny how many times those children look more like the men that fathered them… than the children within the marriage.
The Bible says a good name is worth more than rubies. I was listening to a Preacher preach and he began to talk about rubies. He said that rubies are more rare than diamonds. I had never thought about that… but you know what it is true.
The way most things operate in this world is based upon supply and demand. The higher the demand and the less the supply…the greater the price. Except for this 1 thing… rubies. We often hear of the diamond mines in South Africa and other places. There are some areas where I have heard it said that they… the people who live in some places… almost stumble upon diamonds daily. In these places the people are banned from gathering the diamonds in their country. But I have never heard anything about rubies. I really don’t even know where most rubies come from.
Hold it …I have got to ‘google’ this up.
They are 2nd only to diamonds …and are only the 2nd hardest mineral known to man. They are found in Thailand, India, Madagascar, Zimbabwe, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Kenya, Tanzania, Kampuchea, and most notably in Burma. And here is 1 for you… they are also found in North Carolina… right here in the United States. Imagine that and we rarely ever hear anything about rubies.
But back in Biblical times it is possible that rubies were considered more valuable than diamonds are today. Because the Biblical texts says that ‘a good name is worth more than rubies.’
When you think of it through history certain family names have stood out in this country such as ‘the’ Kennedy’s… ‘the’ Rockefeller’s… and so on. And with those names has come a certain level of respect… and to degree of regard… reverence and honor. These names are held in high regard and come with a track record so to speak of commitment and success. Having such a name opened doors and created opportunities for those who bared their family mark… their name.
Maria Striver has held onto her family identity being part of the Kennedy clan. I never once ever heard her being refered to as Maria Schwarzenegger. Though I guess that was kind of hard to get away from totally as she was, and at this time… still is married to Arnold… who is still governor of California.
How it all plays out remains to be seen. But Maria has lawyered up… and if she moves forward this will be a big 1. And it will cut deeply into Arnold’s fun money.
The moment I read the headline to this story… I knew that I was going to write something on it.
I cannot believe that a 17 or 18…or maybe 20 something young woman would elect to surgically have her body transformed to pretend to be something that she is not. But then to do it… and want to play on the women’s basketball team… is more than a bit puzzling to me.
What is the point?
It just does not make sense. Maybe the boys team is too rough for her… or whomever.
Okay…so, you believe that you are man… and that somehow your body type got confused. And you decide to straighten out whatever mistake that you tell yourself that God must have made… why then after doing all of this… changing your sexual organs and such… I guess… from female to male… then why would you want to play basketball on the women’s team?
Could it be that somewhere down deep… she still feels and knows that she is really a woman?
Perhaps, as confusing to me …it must have been for the young lady, Kye Allums, who ventured out to do it. And recently she has decided to come off of the Georgetown University women’s basketball team amid all this controversy.
It is perplexing.
And maybe… you don’t care to hear this. But if it had not been for the Lord we would all be just as equally confused. Making all kinds of crazy decisions and seeing them as right.
I first heard this story when a friend relayed it to me. I, of course, had always had my own thoughts on this as I had come in contact with Queen Latifah a couple of times. I hadn’t run into her at any parties …but I had heard where she hung out at when she came across the bridge into Manhattan.
And I am all for letting people along… and letting them live their lives. I once was there and I always felt that what I did in the privacy of my bedroom was my own personal business. I, of course, at that time never had any consideration of God. I just felt that as along as it didn’t involve children or animals… then leave me alone.
I also felt that same way about other people and their lives. I never liked listening to people tell me about their long weekends with their boyfriends. BORING.
Because I never thought of the workplace as a place of sharing every detail… and particularly those kind of stories. I was more quiet… laid back. I didn’t talk about my business… and only half listened to what other people were telling me about theirs.
So, the story is finally out… and with pictures. But if you believe it or not… because most people believe whatever they want to… pictures or no pictures anyway. I have always admired Queen Latifah. I am not interested in looking into anyone’s bedroom… I have too much on my own plate for that.
But to me Queen Latifah has always been a good role-model. Even as a rapper… she did not sell herself out… or our people… or other women. She was clean… decent… and came with rapps that jammed not insulted… or made us shame. And then she flipped that around and made herself a movie star…it just showed that she was also capable of reinventing herself… and she was always an entrepreneur.
So, I applaud her.
The fact that you or I may not agree with what she does in the bedroom… does not take away from the fact that she is an adult woman making her own choices and decisions and doing well at doing so. And 1 day she may make another decision just as I did… but that choice is hers… God gave that right to her.
But here is something we can all agree upon… at least she is not walking around trying to make it seem that it is alright. She is not flaunting it.
That takes me now to Tonex. I saw Lexi’s interview… even posted a blog about Tonex. But it is hard for me to agree with anyone who knows scripture… as it is written in the Holy Bible… to believe that living such a life is agreeable to the will of God. It is totally out of step… and I would be remiss if I did not say so.
To some level I will not deny that I have and do still now suffer with my own level of homophobia… which might sound strange coming from an ex-lesbian. But even while living ‘in the life’… I had it. But the 1 thing that I am careful not to do… is to hopefully not offend… hurt… or despise anyone. Nor do I poke fun at… or laugh at… or make light of any situation of being. And this is the way that more people should come to be.
I am not talking about being in acceptance… but being understanding… loving… kind… and not confrontational. The Bible say that with ‘love and kindness have I drawn thee.’
Find that spirit within yourself… and you may start drawing more people to the Lord.
Oh, on my final note… since so many people have been hitting my blog for more information on Cher’s ex-daughter…Chastity… since the release of some pictures this week and the announcement that she is going to marry her long time girl-friend. Here is what I have to say on the matter…
Well, she has managed to harden her facial features and looks more like a man… but at the end of the day… none of us can really un-do anything that God has done. No matter how hard me try… or how much medication… and surgeries you have. It can’t be undone… no matter what the mirror says… or what people tell you.
I’m sorry, Chastity… it is just the way that it is.
Gender transitioning is a misnomer. There is no such thing as transitioning your sex into another. We are what God says we are. Removing or having certain things changed about our physical being does not change our basic DNA. It may corrupt certain cells etc… even effect parts of our chemical make-up. But it is impossible to totally reconstruct certain core things about our inner workings and true gender.
If you can transition your sex… then why stop there?
Why not transition yourself into being rich… or famous?
That’s the point… it just does not happen like that. Though becoming rich and famous are certainly reasonable and achievable goals. But reconstructing your entire physical chemistry is not.
Well, I have been working on this blog for the better part of my day now. Started at about 2:30 this afternoon… and it’s now a little after 4:30 in the morning. Definitely time for me to go to sleep now.
But I did get up to mop the kitchen and bathroom… and got me something to eat in the in-between time. In a few hours it will time for me to get up and go to church. So, I will say good-night…
Hope you have a bless day… and weekend. They say mostly sunny and warm weather this week. I really didn’t mind what we got this past week. It was dark and rainy most of the time. But I like the rain… and that is not to say that I don’t equally enjoy the sun. Because I do.
Well, God bless…
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on…” www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2011
2 comments May 22, 2011
Got up very early again this morning…but I was not nearly as productive as I had been on Saturday. In fact, I got up going to the bathroom and then stopped to read a chapter in my Bible…and then returned to bed.
I spent the past couple of nights sweating out my cold…of course, I can certainly see a vast difference. Been drinking plenty of fluids too…and also been making sure I take my iron tablets. Got to thicken up my blood…which is why I am also enjoying my Cream of Wheat. I am working on my 2nd box of it now…and still enjoying every minute of it. And as I do…it makes me think of how my father used to make it for us as children.
Mondays was our father’s day to care for us. As he was a barber…Sundays and Mondays were his 2 days off. I do not know how they worked out their schedules…but my mother and father did have it worked out as we were never left in the care of other people.
Daddy worked days and mommy worked nights. She worked at a state institution as a nurse supervisor…as I had previously stated in another one of my blogs…my mother had been the first black nurse in the little southern town where I was born.
Everything my parents did centered around us…their children. When they bought their first house…it was less than a block away from the little grade school that most of us went to…there was a bakery at the corner…a drug store…a small corner grocery store and deli…a bus stop…and we were only three houses in from the corner of a main roadway. Not to mention as I see by the city records today…they had bought the largest parcel of land of any 2 family house within our block. They were wise. And on top of all of that…there is a college right across the street.
So, when I eat Cream of Wheat it takes me back to those days…when daddy used to make it for us on cold mornings just as were going off to school. Some mornings he would fry us this thing called festival by some Jamaicans…or fried dumplings. He could really make those things…no matter what you call them. And we loved them…we filled them up hot out of the pan with plenty of butter and jelly…or some times with lots of syrup and butter…but they were good…always. But daddy was a great cook…and for that matter…so was our mother.
I am watching the snow fall down…and it is steady. It had been rain. It had rained straight through the night…and hard. Had all that rain been snow we would have been buried up under it right now. And that rain had been steady right up to the time it just turned to snow not so long ago. Now it is just a steady flow of un-yielding snow. I will soon have to go out and start shoveling…cold or no cold. But I am not going to complain…it is still beautiful.
I remember my friend in New York…the elderly woman, the church mother, who used to go to our church who passed this past August. You know I had never realized until some time later that she had passed on my mother’s birth date. And last night as I was thinking of her…my friend…it also dawned on me that when I had gone to the hospital to visit her…that the floor I had to switch from elevator to elevator on…had the same name as our street…the street that my parent’s house in on.
It is not a common name…and you do not see it everywhere. I thought that to be divine providence…you know…God’s working in the matter. I was very blessed to have had her…to have met her…and that she counted me as a friend. Her guidance to me shall forever be treasured.
In reading the article on religion…it is odd to me that a country founded on the freedom to practice religious beliefs would today be shifting away from having religion at all. But these days were bound to come.
When you reflect back on the years following 1962 when the push began to remove prayer from public schools…then anything bearing the word “God”…the challenge to remove the 10 Commandments from court houses and so forth…then this really should be of no surprise.
I don’t know…perhaps it is just me. But where were all those anti-gay marriage people…and anti-abortion people when all of this was going on?
Droves of anti-gay marriage people come out picketing and marching…and demonstrating…against something which does not affect them…and will never affect them. But when something like taking prayer out the public school system…removal of the 10 Commandments from the court houses and other federal buildings…removing the words “In God we trust” off of our U.S. currency…comes up…where are these people?
Prayer was taken out of our school and replaced by sex education…and condoms. The kids today in school learn less about their A-B-C’s, Math, Sciences etc…than they are about condoms and the ‘birds and the bees.’
Kids do not need to learn anything about sex. Nature through all her infinite wisdom and years of expertise in that department has not needed any help…from the day that Adam and Eve ate that fruit from that tree. There does not seem to be one time in history that men and women did not know how to get together to procreate. And now it seems…little kids too. And I won’t blame it all on sex-education…because that would be foolish and quite absurb of me. But I do not see where educating kids about sex…does one thing to prepare them for their future in life.
But if they wanted to really to teach them something in regard to youth parenting…then maybe like those ‘Scared Straight’ programs they used to have years ago…perhaps they should take them to a welfare office where they get to meet and talk to some teenage mothers and see for themselves the pitfalls of pregnancy at young ages. There is nothing like a little one-on-one in reality in order to get the whole picture.
Or maybe…have them go do work study hours in places like a welfare office or WIC office aiding in in-take service…and they would truly learn a lot that just might give them a reason to pause and to think twice about the consequences of childhood pregnancy.
As I sit here watching the snow…I have been thinking about this guy…this man. I had met him at an event that I gave a few years ago. So, whenever he sees me…he likes to greet me.
Which is fine…I have no problem with that. It is something I became accustom to through my years in radio. Everybody wants to grab you…hug you…kiss you on the cheek. Okay…so, allow it. It is part of the territory…it goes with the turf when you become popular.
But this guy one day while I was in the library computer lab at school saw me…and he came greeting me…kissing me on the top of my head. Okay…fine. I did not say anything about it…but it was on my mind.
But the other day while I was waiting in a bank line…he happened to be passing by and saw me. My back was to the bank door…and he came up behind me. He said something to me grinning…and then kissed me to the back of my neck. I thought nothing of it at first…but later as I got into my son’s truck…in which sat a friend of his whom I was giving a ride to…that is when it hit me.
That guy had kissed me to the back of my neck.
I am very picky. Peculiar…you might even say. I really do not like people getting too familiar with me…and particularly people who I do not really know. And besides…he was not even good-looking. And even if he was…he still out of order…and I am still picky.
After all, this guy started out by sort of hugging me. Then he moved on to greeting me with a light kiss to a cheek…then to the top of my head. And I really should have stopped him then. So, I put it in my mind that the next time I saw that guy I would have to tell him that he could not touch me again.
That time came shortly…while I was once again in the library computer lab. As he approached me…he bent with his arms open ready to embrace me…and I guess kiss me again. But I happened to catch him…right on time…and drew away from him.
I stopped him saying-
“Listen, shake my hand if you want to greet me. But do not kiss me.”
He looked at me oddly.
So, I began to remind him about that day in the bank when he had come in and kissed me on my neck. I told him that anyone seeing that would have thought that we had a relationship and were involved with each other. Then I asked him what he would have thought if he had been standing off somewhere in the distance and happened to see a man kiss me on my neck.
And you know what he said?
“I would have thought that you were involved with each other too.”
“Look, I am a woman of God. I cannot just have people walking up to me and kissing me all over the place like that. Plus that is disrespectful of me for you to do that. You should have more respect of me to even do anything like that.”
Wow, I have truly grown. I am a woman.
Gone are the days when I was a child…and people could do anything to me…or with me.
I have control over me.
And I am not having it.
You will respect me.
Wow… I am woman.
That guy apologized to me…and thanked me for correcting him. I appreciated him accepting my correction. Yet…I felt within myself that it should not have been warranted that I should have had to do such a thing. But men have a way…of taking things for granted…and particularly women.
I felt that many times while working in radio. I hated when my bosses called me ‘sweetheart,’ and ‘dear.’ It was very demeaning to me…while they never greeted each other in such a way…or spoke to each other in such familiar terms. Consciously , sub-consciously or unconsciously…such things historically have been designed to keep women in their place.
When I was a child…I was powerless. When I worked in radio…I had limited power. Today I am my own boss…I wheel power as I may…but yet…I measure it. As I know I can be highly intimidating to some.
But this may come as a surprise to some of you. But I have never been kissed. Not by the male species.
I know I have a son…but that does not mean that I allowed that man to kiss me. And I know that I said in my other blog…that Willis Kattrell…well, he kissed me. And he did. But I think my head was in motion when he did it…so he only caught a portion of my lips. To the side really…of my mouth.
So, I have never been kissed. Not really…though yes many women have kissed me…and I them. But the male species…no.
I never had a boyfriend…and have never dated men.
I am different… Not like most people. And my experiences have been different.
Yet, I am a mother. And I have a fantastically wonderful son. I treasure and love him very much. He too is…different.
This is how I know of generational curses. It was in my mother’s family. And I do realize…that generational curses can be broken. I bear witness to it.
I love the change in my life and look forward to my tomorrow. Perhaps…my husband. I now wish I had had other children. My son often had spoken of it…and still does.
There is this funny thing about me. After having been sexually abused at a very early age…perhaps before or by the age of 10…only twice and by 2 different men…but sometime thereafter, I decided that I wanted to save myself for my husband. I thought I wanted to live in a big house with a white picket fence…with a 2 car gargage…and have all the children that I could have. So, that is what I did…I decided to save myself…and that is what I did.
From the point of whatever age it was…10 maybe less…the last time someone had taken sexual advantage of me…I never became engaged again sexually until some time when I was 25 years of age. At this point…I was only interested in woman. And not just any woman. Gay women…women like me. Women who were upper-wardly mobile and doing something with their lives…professional women mostly in media…though some were doctors, accountants etc…but talented…beautiful…well educated women…who looked and acted womanly.
Not all women who are gay…look it. In fact…many do not. The same is true of men…though the reverse thinking about gays is the myth.
I have no idea as to why I have begun to disclose so much to you…about myself. I shall have to pounder it.
Ahhh…yes… The point.
So, I decided to save myself. Well, at that point I could no longer save certain things as they had been stripped from me. My innocence had been stolen from me. But somehow throughout all the years one thing has remained…my kisses. So, since I have never kissed the male species…or allowed anyone of that species to kiss me directly on the lips…I decided to save it.
I am saving it for my husband…it is the least that I can give him. Unpolluted…un-tampered with…safe within my power…to give…or not to give. So, I am saving it for him. So, no I am not going to let somebody just walk up to me…or sneak up from behind me…and think that he can just come and steal it away from me…not that too. Except for…of course…er, uhm…if his name is Willis Kattrell. (you have just got to read that blog)
And let me just say…that I am still scrubbing my neck today…everytime I step into the shower…I am trying to remove the memory of that man’s lips to the back of my neck.
Well, the snow is slowing up now. And the kids are on their way home from school. I better get out and start shoveling. Enjoy the rest of your day.
Didn’t like the VOGUE cover of Michelle Obama at all…just goes to prove that nobody can do us better than us. Thank God for Essence, Ebony, Jet, VIB, Right-On, Black Enterprise…and everything
else we have today.
Thank you for reading this blog…and my others. Please be sure to continue to share this blog site with your family, co-workers and all your friends… “pass it on “ www.bsmith101.wordpress.com ©2009
Add a comment March 9, 2009
These young girls are receiving all the wrong messages and there is little being said about it. And forget…about ‘being done about it.’ Bcause that isn’t happening either.
The teen pact in Massachusetts was a shocker and should have created far more than just a wake-up call. It should have had people rolling out of their beds onto the floor and leaping up yelling-
“We’ve got to do something about this.”
But it did not. It was merely a hot topic for the moment…and then it was gone off the horizon.
What has since been done?
What heighten interest in this topic has been generated?
How many encounter groups have been formed to sincerely meet this problem head-on?
Where is the concern on this topic?
Teen sexual habits as they are today are highly serious problems. There is more at stake than a boy and girl getting together sexually. The problem is bigger than that and no one is really or sincerely looking into this problem. The issues and the impact are huge.
There are health issues involved…all kinds of dieases…many of which are life long. But this problem is also going to put millions more on the welfare rows.
Under age girls becoming mothers does impact us all and it should be all of our concerns. It is a moral issue…but it is even greater than that. And this concern is not only to what it will cost the states and eventually the federal government of this country, but there should also be a concern that these young girls are no more than mere kids themselves. Beyond a point the level of resentment does arise. And these kids have no knowledge that they are severely limiting their future life goals, expectations and levels of success…and choices in life.
While the kids are suppose to be busy going back and forth to school every day…they now have to balance their education with trying to parent babies or very young children. This can be a very daunting task for young parentsas babies and/or children take up a lot of time. It is even a very difficult task for the most grown-up adults to handle.
Children take time…and lots of it. They also require responsible and reasonable people in the care of them. Young girls under the age of 12 of even into their 20s or 30s many times are not ready for such a heavy responsibility nor the sacrafices that becoming a mother calls for.
Instead of chasing behind the gay population and trying to change them, and trying to get them to conform when laws are being created every day to encourage just the opposite…we should try working instead to make an impact in an area where we all have some level of control and a voice and that is among our children.
Oftentimes, the argument about education gets down to ‘the home’…well, this argument certainly is a ligitmate argument in this debate…as things in ‘the home’ can lead to effecting change.
Whether parents realize it or not…they can regulate their homes, the type of messages that their children are receiving, what is watched and listened to in ther homes…etc… But it is far more involved than just putting a chip in the cable system to block certain programming. It means getting your child’s face off myspace, out of facebook and whatever or wherever else it is…or whatever means they use to to make contact and meet people with whom they are enaging in sex…which on the face of it alone even sounds and looks wrong.
I personally don’t believe that anybody worth meeting is on the internet. You, if you are an adult, you should not indulged in it…and certainly your children should not. Yes, the internet has it values and good uses, but it also has a lot of risk factors…and safety issues when it comes to your children, teens…and even for older people who never learned that….yes, the world can be full of evil people who lie and try to sway you into dangerous places and situations. Predators are real…and none of you should have to find this out first hand.
But the kids are not alone when it comes to the internet. There are tons of grown up supposedly adult people who are doing the exact same thing. They have pages on myspace and pictures in facebook etc. And it is all wrong if you use it like a game of Russian roulette.
There is little wonder why the kids are in the situation that they are in if the adults are setting the examples or…and I hate to say this…or if the adults in their lives are following their examples…the kids examples in meeting people and becoming sexually involved with just anybody and everybody via the internet. Or even outside of meeting them over the internet.
What in the world is this world coming to?
What is the world is that?
There is too much tied in to sex…just the inter-personal nature of it alone. Call it what you want…but sex is not casual…it is just too intimate for that.
It is all wrong. WRONG….WRONG.
And of course, I know that the kids are hooking up at school too. Let’s face it now…even I at some point was a kid. But I never was stupid…and there is just no other way to say that. Nor was I…or have I ever been common.
There is something seriously wrong when a bunch of young girls are busy thinking more about getting pregnant than they are about the dress they plan of wearing to their class prom…or how they are going to get their mom to give them the money to go to movies next weekend.
There is something wrong when sex is the only thing on the fore-minds of young kids in school…more so than trying to study for an exam or thinking about their futures.
They do not care about an exam…or evidently their futures. No, they do not. Because if they did they wouldn’t be busy trying to get pregnant…or thinking about getting pregnant.
When I was growing up people tried hard to avoid getting pregnant. But then he standards of the day have been drastically lowered as opposed to those of yester-year. In fact, there are none…not today.
When did getting pregnant at a very early age become a badge of honor in this country?
And how can these kids be expected to do any better than the people they are watching and trying to emulate present these kinds of things to them day in and day out?
These kids are obsessed with images of the people they consider to be so-called stars. These so-called stars…they read about them, skim through the web to catch photos of…watch them in the movies or on television…and/or listen to on their iPods. And these people are their role models…whom they desire to emulate in every possible way…down to having babies by this one and by that one over there. And they never see a marriage ring or a wedding band.
That is the world our many of kids live in…and many adults, as well. That is why they can search facebook or myspace…and go from one person to the next. Because they live in a world of ‘no commitment.’ There parents are not committed to them. There teachers aren’t committed to them. Their schools aren’t committed to them…the government…society…nothing.
So, what do you expect…when a stranger over the internet shows them more interest than you do?
Even if it is for a hot minute. To them it beats none at all…no matter what they end up having to sacrifice.
Parents have got to invest time in…and quality time with their children. They need us to be concern about them…about their day…what’s going on with them…and the things we can help them with…as well as to encourage them…and, of course, to look out for their well being, as well as, protect them. There has to be quality time invested in your children’s lives all through their development…even into adulthood…if they allow you. And they will…if they trust you…but that trust is built up over time. That trust comes with involvement in their lives from the earliest stages of their lives straight throughout their developedment into adulthood.
It is time for America to not just take a serious look at this problem of teen and under age sex…but also to actively work to do something to cuve it. This tide must be stemmed because of the dire future consequences for America.
These young babies need to have a fighting chance at life. And they can’t do that by being born to people who are not mature enough to parent them properly.
The cost, to the system upon whom they will soon be imposing, should not become the driving force to make this country face this problem today.
…pass it on…’ www.bsmith101.wordpress.com
…pass it on…’ www.bsmith101.wordpress.com
God bless…and thanks for reading ©2008
Add a comment November 19, 2008
And there was…the supposed man in the story…is really a woman living as a man who…I started to say had a sex change. But she couldn’t have otherwise she wouldn’t have been able to have the baby or get impregnanted.
I am naive on many things…and I truly am.
But there are somethings which clearly just irritate me.
Why go through all of the trouble of trying to present yourself as a man…and then want to get pregnant?
What was she trying to make a mockery of?
Herself or God?
He can’t be made a mockery of.
And then to have this picture of her…well, supposely him and the baby together. Well…
Was this just a media thang?
And now they…what? The gay couple exploit the child and their relationship? Selling their story to the tabloids and appearing on talk shows. Anything for a dime or a dollar.
I once knew someone…and I guess I still do…just that I haven’t seen them in a very long time.
When I first met this person I realized something was out of whack…but I could not put my hands on it.
She lived in the same town as a friend of mines…and I say she because really that is what I met him as…and have only known him as. Though I do realize to call him…her would be lying…though at the time of course I was not saved…nor trying to be.
It was my friend who informed of what I just couldn’t put my finger on.
She said to me one night…while we were all out at dinner or something I think…she said after the person had gotten up from the table-
“I know you kept saying that there was something strange…or something about her. So, I have decided to tell you. And don’t look over there at her when I tell you this.”
I said, “Okay. So, what is it?”
And she said…she ain’t a she.
I know I said I wouldn’t look over in her direction…but my head spun around so quickly. It was an automatic response. I could not believe it. I knew I had felt something was out of whack…but I never would have guessed it was that.
My friend immediately admonished me saying-
“I told you don’t look. Don’t look.”
But I could not help but look. In fact I was staring. I had never experienced anything like that before. It was adverse to me.
I thought that she was a woman and nothing could have prepared me for anything otherwise.
I told you I had been terribly naive…and to some degree still am.
That was at a time when I was heavily involved in gay life…hanging out…partying in clubs with women…and a member of Salsa Soul Sisters, Inc, in New York City. My life is by no means like that now but there was a time…almost 25 years of my life when that is what I did. Before that I was not sexually involved at all.
So, I had gone through grade school and college without any type of involvement. Never dated boys in my life.
I was just different from most people and lived a highly sheltered life under the wings of my parents.
It was in Salsa Soul Sisters that I met this person whom I had introduced to my friend who had just moved to New Jersey from St. Louis. Salsa was a lesbian organization…and I guess that is why I never would have guessed that this person had been anything other than a woman.
But this is the way it went…she was a guy who wanted to be a woman and then a lesbian.
When the Salsa Soul Sisters found out about this…every founding mother and everybody else stormed into Salsa one night…the record had to be set straight (no pun intented)…and they called an emergency meeting. Where it was voted on that no biological male could ever become a board member of Salsa. Because that was really the issue…not only did she want to become a woman and be a lesbian…but she also was nominated to run for a position on the board of directors of Salsa…and that of course was a no-no for any male…real or operated on…which at the time she was not. And the Salsa Soul Sisters were not having it…not at all.
You would have loved to have heard those women that night…it got pretty heated…and they were not playing.
In the end I felt sorry for him…because he was nice and had proven to be a good worker. But my Salsa Soul Sisters were right…and I had to agree with them.
Salsa was a black lesbian organization…the oldest in the world. And through their years some very well known women, writers, artist of every type…and professional women and otherwise…etc… have walked through their doors…including Audrey Lorde, June Jordan and many many many others…all Salsa Soul Sisters. Some very well known and widely read, and seen in media and all facets of the arts, performing and otherwise, as well as educators etc…all Salsa Soul Sisters. Exceedingly, talented women.
It was hard for me to grasp why she…he would want to dress up as an woman and engage in sexual activity with women as a lesbian. She was after all a man…by living his life as man…he would not have had any of the confusion that just knowing the story caused me and many of the other Salsa Soul Sisters.
And as much as they tried…tried to not say…many of those same women dated her…before and after that meeting.
There is much confusion in the world…and I am so glad to not have that type of confusion any longer.
I am so glad that God has reclaimed my life…and set me free from the bondage that once held me.
Perhaps as strange as I thought she was…she was not more strange than I was. One thing is for certain we were both lost. I don’t know about her or him today…but I have been set free. And I walk in liberty.
But there is one thing though…I will leave a pocketbook like most people forget an umbrella…because I am not used to carrying one. So, most of the time I don’t even bother with them…unless it is something like a bookbag…because I will walk off and leave it. Smile…and even that too may become a thing of the past.
It is so good to be free. I cannot thank the Lord enough…for saving me.
Have a good day… and God bless….
Oh, yeah…another Chinese word. wu bu dong …. means I don’t understand… wu is Chinese for ‘I’.
It has been raining most of the day and yesterday…but just as I was about to finish telling this story the ceiling started leaking. I look at it as a sign that the devil just doesn’t want me to tell this story. But I will tell it everywhere I go if need be…if it can encourage somebody or help someone else to find peace and deliverance in their life. I’m going to tell it.
I am oh so thankful….for the chance to share it with you.
It is funny…but the moment I wrote that last paragraph the ceiling stopped leaking. It is the power of God…to speak what he puts upon your heart to speak. I know that this blog is going to touch someone in a special kind of way…and I am so happy to be able to speak life and truth into your life. Be bless… ©2008
Add a comment July 24, 2008
Felt like I wanted a donut…
Why can’t I have a donut if I want one?
So, every now a then…sometimes I just feel like I want a donut. Sometimes it could be a piece or chocolate cake…and real good chocolate cakes are hard to find nowadays. But sometimes I feel like I want one of those old time good tasting pieces of chocolate cake. Now, that I might have to have a couple of pieces if I could find it.
I don’t know…I guess from time to time we all get a taste for something…andwhen we do… Well, we just want it.
Well, this evening about 9:30 p.m. my urge was for a donut.
So, I jumped into the car and headed for the local Dunkin Donuts. But the one near the house was closed…just goes to prove I don’t get a donut urge often…otherwise I would have known that.
So, since I really wanted this donut and the place nearest to the house was closed…and I was already in the car…and even though gas is $4.16 per gallon…I decided to go for it…and get my donut anyways.
I drove right pass the second donut place believing that it too was going to be close. And even though I had my glasses on…I totally missed the big bright and very lit up sign reading “Dunkin Donuts.”
So, I had to make a u-turn. And as I drove home smacking on my donuts :). I started thinking wouldn’t it have been nice to be able to say-
“Baby, I want a donut.”
And someone would get up and go get in the car and get me a donut.
At any part of the day when my mother would come in, shower and lay down on the bed…if she desired something she rarely called any of us…her 8 children. Instead she could be heard calling for my father.
She would call him softly…never in a barking or rough tone…and she never called daddy by his real name…instead she called him, Douglas.
Whatever daddy was doing he would stop and go to mommie and see what it was that she wanted.
And sometimes mommie would just say-
“Douglas, bring me a glass of water.”
Daddy never complained…and always went to do or get whatever my mother would ask him for.
He was a businessman who had a very prosperous barber business that had serviced many generations of men in our town. His business did so well that we were literally the richest people in our church, probably on our street and perhaps in many of the circles in which we travelled even as teens and young adults.
They were very good together…my parents.
Daddy was 15 years older than mommie but you would have never had guessed it.
I have never met anybody who had all the capabilities of daddy. He could have been a tailor if he had wanted to…or a chef, or a mechanic, or an architech. Daddy could do everything. And he could do them all well…even better than well. He was superbly proficient in everything that he could do…and there was nothing that daddy could not do.
Sundays and Mondays were daddy’s days to cook. Though my mother would help out on Sundays doing things like baking (cakes, pies, fresh rolls etc.) and making macaroni & cheese, and cooking the greens…things like that. But daddy prepared all the meats which would entail him cutting up many onions, scallions and all kinds of spices.
He always seasoned his meats hours before cooking…and if it was curry goat he would season it the night before. Daddy would take his hands and mesh the seasoning into the meat. He would pour in hot water and allow the seasoning along with the curry and the onions to steam into the meat before placing it into the refrigerator to sit overnight. That is how he always cooked the curry goat.
He also prepared the rice, whether it was rice and beans, or regular rice, mashed potatoes etc.
Both mommie and daddy were fantastic cooks…and they could do everything from scratch. And didn’t have to refer to one cookbook.
Dinner was always a feast at our house no matter what day it was…but on Sundays even more so…we would 2 or 3 meats to chose from. And there were always guest whom my mother would bring home from church to share our Sunday dinners with us.
It wasn’t until I lived in Chicago…and was a thousands miles away from home that I came to realize just how special it was to be able to open up your home to other people. When I was in Chicago, I was away from family and all my friends…and there were many times when I was in need. This, of course, I never shared with my parents. No, I couldn’t do that.
I went to Chicago to become this big-time radio personality. As bad as things sometimes got for me, I managed to even send some money ocassionally…though at one point I was virtually homeless in Chicago.
Sending money home to my parents was something I had seen my parents do throughout our years of growing up…so, when I became of age it was what I wanted to do too. So, I sent…I never thought about whether or not my parents needed it. Because clearly my parents had more than enough…as our family was exceedingly blessed.
But while in Chicago there were some holidays that came around…Christmas and Thanksgiving. And when you are alone and away from your family for the first time in your life it can be very sad and lonely those 2 holidays.
While in Chicago, I never got a job on a radio station…but I had talked to Tom Joyner, Barry Mayo, BB Banna and several others on a regular basis trying to get in. But I ended up working at a church instead as a church secretary. I was in need and after a long period of looking I finally landed this job. At first I felt myself above it. “Me”….a secretary….”me…”
Big time me…a church secreatary?
But my no soon turned to a yes when I met my would be boss during an interview…which I nearly refeused to go to because “it was just too beneath me.” Thank God, I did not.
Of all the jobs I have ever had that job has meant the most to me, and I know today that it was right where God intended for me to be. For the lessons that it taught me and the greatest example of mentoring and leadership anyone could have possibly have gotten…I got there.
The church was 6th Grace United Presbyterian Church, 35th and Cottage Grove, on Chicago’s South Side…right down the street from the White Sox stadium. The Pastor was the late Dr. A. L. Reynolds, Jr…who from the moment I met him, I began to marvel at him. I have never met anybody like Dr. A. L. Reynolds, Jr…not even to this day. And at the moment I met him I knew he was special…but I had never realized that I had stepped into the presence of greatness until years later. What a man.
Why am I telling you this story…I have no idea. I will have to go back and read some of what I just wrote to see where I’m suppose to be going with this….give me a minute….
I sometimes get lost.
Oh, yes…oh, yes….
While at home with our parents, I used to wonder why we couldn’t spend our Sundays and holidays with just us…just our family. Why did we always have to have people over our house, eating our food and taking up our time?
I was selfish…terribly so.
It wasn’t until I was a thousand miles away from home that I came to realize just what a blessing my parents…my mother and father were to other people.
My parents didn’t invite people into our home who had a lot of things, or who were rich or popular…they invited people who didn’t have family, some were even in nursing homes…whom we would go and pick up to bring to church then take them to our house for dinner and back to church, and then later back to their nursing home at the end of the day.
They, my parents…they brought sunshine into people’s lifes and they never asked for anything in return. They enjoyed doing it.
In Chicago, I spent 2 holidays in the home of the Rippleton’s. Mr. and Mrs. Rippleton were the parents of the late singer Minnie Rippleton…and they had been members of 6th Grace. They were extremely nice people and full of alot of fun. Mr. Rippleton was a real comedian. Mrs. Rippleton sometimes talked to me about Minnie and the cancer, and how difficult it had been for Minnie…and their family watching her go through that.
My very first day on that job…I got a call early in the morning from someone asking to speak to Dr. Reynolds.
The woman said, “Hello, this is Minnie Rippleton. Is Dr. Reynolds in?”
I almost dropped the phone…that 6 octive voice, Grammy Winner…Minnie Rippleton was on the other line talking to me. And here I had come to Chicago to get into radio…and couldn’t get in. And here was Minnie Rippleton on the other end of my office line…the very first call on my first day on the job.
CLICK to LISTEN Loving You – Minnie Ripperton They don’t make music like this anymore…nor like her family, the Rippertons, whom I shall always love and have the greatest and highest regard for… for their love and hospitality to me… as well as the whole 6th Grace family.
Minnie died that evening but she had called and conversed with Dr. Reynolds, her spiritual advisor and Pastor. She had called in the first thing that Monday morning.
It was also at 6th Grace that I met Harold Washington…but that is another story for another time.
And perhaps I will get around to telling about when I met James Baldwin…what a day that was. I never met anyone like him…he was quite gracious. But that too is another story that perhaps I will get around to sharing with you at some other time.
Let me go back to telling you about my father.
Daddy could make the best ice tea, Kool-aide and lemonade. He also made homemade ice cream, in a variety of tropical favors, which we all gladly churned on Sundays.
Daddy was so good at everything including his business that in the morning men would be outside our door waiting on him to give him a ride to work…so that they could be the first one in his barber chair.
Daddy caught the bus to work usually. His barber shop was in the downtown area of our town. He always got up on time and would arrive at his shop every morning that it was due to open, Monday-Saturday, at 7:30 a.m. where a few of his customers were sure to be there waiting on him. And because he was so popular…this was, of course, the reason why some of them would come to the house to give him a ride.
Daddy loved it. He loved his customers…and always respected their time.
The one thing daddy never did…he didn’t eat sandwiches.
Mommie always prepared daddy a hot lunch which she would drive down to him some time during noon. But most of the time daddy would bring the food home mostly untouched because he would never get a chance to eat it. He was always busy taking care of customers right up until the time he closed his shop for the night.
And when he came home mommie always had him something good to eat…and it was always fresh and hot. He didn’t eat what we ate. Where mommie might make us spaghetti some nights, or homemade chicken pot pie, or meatloaf on others etc…which of course all kids love…but daddy would get stuff like smoothered steak with green peppers and onions over mashed potatos, and some sort of vegetable.
Another thing about daddy…he was a saver. He was also one of those people who as soon as a bill came in he would pay it. He never waited on due dates to pay anything. He managed money very well…and had the bank accounts to prove it. And though he only had a 7th grade education which render his reading skills weak…he could sure count money. He stayed on top of his money and his bills.
Though my mother worked as well…her money was her money. Daddy provided for our family. He paid for all our household expenditures, mortgages, grocery bills etc. And anything to do with us…he paid for it.
Daddy was clearly the husband that the Bible calls men to be…a provider. And our household wanted for nothing.
As children we spend our Christmas’ in Florida…and by the time we would return home over the holiday it was as if Toys R Us had made a special trip just to our house.
As we grew up we started spending our summers in Florida instead.
My parents spared nothing.
When they wanted a new car…they bought it. And they bought nothing that we all could not fit in.
When we went on trips…we all went.
When they decided to go to Jamaica…it was a family affair…which was the way my parents treated everything.
My mother loved to shop and that is what she did with her money. But she not only loved shopping for herself…but for us as well…as well as for daddy. At eighteen she was still buying all of my clothes. And everything she bought was top shelf.
And that is how daddy bought too. He did not buy cheap…and he tailored all his own clothes. He had the measuring tape, the pins and the white chalk to make the marks…the whole works. Daddy took everything serious. He was very percise and took such care in whatever he did. And he could sew by hand…as well as anyone could with a sewing machine.
In the basement he had all his tools; saws, drills, snakes for the plumbing system (which comes in handy when you have kids), levers…everything. Because daddy could build and make things, and was always working around the house.
Including gardening…daddy did that too…as well as service our cars and bicycles.
Mommie loved daddy’s tomatoes, green peppers and cabbage, strings beans, greens etc…
Yes, along with everything else daddy also had a green thumb too.
I don’t know who taught daddy…but they taught him well.
Though daddy might not have been able to read well…that, however, never stopped him from picking up a book and trying to sound his way through a few words…or from starting his business. And when I think on it…the thought of me helping him to learn to read never even came into my mind. I do not know why.
Mommie had been the first black nurse in the little town she grew up in down in a small town in Florida. When she retired she had been a nurse supervisor at a state institution.
Their schedules rotated around their children. We were their pride and joy.
They treated us to everything…everything good. They were not drinkers, smokers, cursers or things like that…nor did they allow cards or card playing in their house. Though we could play Ol’ Maid, checkers and stuff like that. And I do not know how Daddy could do it…but he was a master even at checkers.
Who could beat him?
Before you knew it he had the board loaded with kings…and just blowing you away with his moves taking everything you had on the board. What a mind.
We were never allowed into people’s houses, nor could any of our friends come into our house. As my parents said that they had had 8…and that 8 was enough.
We were not allowed to stay over people’s houses. And they did not believe in paying us any allowances for helping out around the house. Which sometimes included getting on our knees and scrubbing the floors, or wiping down all (and I do all) the woodwork in the house etc…etc… Oh, how I hated those Saturday mornings when we would be waken up to find buckets in the kitchen with rags in them…waiting on us.
From our parent’s house have sprang graduates from Moorehouse, Florida A & M, Princeton, University of Alabama, University of Kentucky, Brandeis University, etc…etc…and they are still coming. We’ve got a few more who will graduating in a couple of years and some whom we have began to set up for Spellman and Harvard…you’ve got to plant these seeds early.
My parents were believers in education. My mother was always taking classes. I can’t tell you how many times she took typing… she kept flunking it. But she kept on taking it anyways. She also took bookkeeping and a few other classes…including voice lessons.
Mommie definitely could not sing…but that didn’t stop her. I have to admit that the voice lessons did do a little good though.
Whenever mommie would go to school for a conference regarding me…she would come home with the report to my father. Whenever I tried to explain to my father about the teacher and how she didn’t like me…my father would always stop me short…and never hear whatever it was I was trying to tell him.
He would glare at me saying-
“The teacher got her’s you’ve got to get yours.”
I hated hearing those words…but today I understand them well. And daddy was right. I’ve even come to recite them a few times myself.
Daddy was full of witticisms also. He was some kind of special…and I don’t know how he and mommie met. But one thing for sure they sure loved each other.
Yes, daddy was very special and if ever I were looking for someone…I doubt that I would ever ever find anyone quite like daddy.
Well, if you feel like a donut…I hope you have someone who can go get you one. Or go with you…or take you to get one.
I hope I didn’t rample on and on…and that you got some sense out of this blog.
Enjoy your day…and I’m working on my rib business. I have spent so much money that I have actually run out of money. I have the whole set-up but I don’t have the money to buy the goods. So, maybe we will up and running by next weekend…this weekend looks a bit bleek. But it is all part of the process. Sometimes you have just got to learn how to go with the flow.
You know I really learned that from my friend in New York whom we are expecting to pass.
In her words…”Whatever God allows.” ….God bless… ©2008
Add a comment July 16, 2008
This post is inspired by a sermon by Bishop Charles Ellis, III, of Detroit, MI, entitled “I’m Still Standing in an Upside Down World.”
There is something about my blog on ‘Gay Pride’ which plagues me somewhat.
I in no ways intended to say or make it appear that I agree with gay (same-sex) marriages. Oh, no… In no way could I do that. For those things which are wrong are wrong…and gay marriages are wrong. And certainly go against the will of God.
However, what I was trying to say was…that I thought it was interesting that many gay people want to get married whereas many heterosexuals (for whom marriage was intended) do not.
I think that we have to be very careful in making statements that make wrong seem right…and to some degree that blog may have seemed that way to some. But it was not intended that way.
The Bible says “With love and kindness have I drawn thee.”
So, therefore I cast no judgement upon anyone.
Yes, I have opinions but my opinions are not meant to comdemn.
I don’t like gay jokes…particularly from the culpit. Because there is nothing funny about sin. So, therefore no sin should become a joke.
Nor do I like speaking about being homosexual or heterosexual…as to speak in terms of sex is to be caught up in fleshy things…because sex has to do with the flesh. And it is something which we all have to battle against.
Speaking of which, you will have to read my book when it comes out, “The Bishop’s Wife”….a sho’nuf must read. I will tell you when you can get it…as it is already at the publishers…you can read about that in my very first first blog…under ‘self-publishing.’ Well, so much for my shameless plug for my up-coming book…“The Bishop’s Wife.”
I hope I have addressed the issue of same-sex marriages, pre-martial sex (all of which you can read in my ‘Gay Pride’ blog)… along with my stance on them and other things all through my blogs…of which, if you haven’t read them all…do indeed give them a read. And don’t forget to share this blog address www.bsmith101.wordpress.com with your family and friends…and co-workers…everybody! Enjoy…and thank you for reading.
Be kind to those around you. With love…champion your enemies.
I will never forget once being in downtown Brooklyn when I came across a young employee whom I had had a lot of problems with…but when she saw me downtown that day (which had been the first time she had seen me for some time)…when she saw me…she came running towards and threw her arms around me burying her head in my chest with such joy.
And I said to her as we conversed, “Patrina, I thought that you didn’t like me.”
And she answered saying, “Yes, Miss Smith. But you were fair.”
So, I say champion your enemies and they will run towards you…with open arms.
ps….I have been doing nothing but sleeping. I’m still trying to catch up to all the sleep I lost while being on vacation last week. ©2008
Add a comment July 14, 2008